Back on track & feeling better

Feb 05, 2009

It has been quite a while since I have blogged or focused on the most important thing in my life.  MY HEALTH & this journey that I started.  Well, it has been long enough!!!!  I have started getting back to basics in Food logs, nutrition appointments, planning meals & physical activity.  I am tired of not truly feeling good about my weight loss & beating myself up since I KNOW that I should be much further along then I am right now.  And why is that??  I had to take a good hard look at myself & what I was doing.  Yes, have a come a long way in the past couple of years?  Sure, but when I signed on the dotted line to once & for all go forward with this surgery a year ago, I made a commitment to myself which I have since backed out on.  I have NOT made myself & my health my 1st priority in a while & I know that sometimes it is easier said then done but the problem with me is that I have always put everyone ahead of myself & I have been the one to suffer.  I did start off very good in the beginning of last year with saying no to certain requests that would not put my time or feelings first which was hard at the beginning but felt really good after a while.  I had also learned of some of my so-called best friends & family that maybe took advantage at times.  That was eye opening, but a very good thing to be opened to.  I have several reasons for my lack of focus over the past couple of months but to be honest they have to be put behind me.  I need to work on a way that I can be there physically & emotionally for my loved ones who truly need me while still making my goals not slip in the process.
Sometimes I feel that this struggle is a minute to minute struggle where other days are not as difficult.  Today is an hour by hour kind of day so far.

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