barbie1963
It started when I was little being given food treats because of physical and mental abuse in my home. Then as I grew I learned to feed myself. Of course like everyone else I was picked on in school and called names. I had a number of friends that were kind to me. I even found sweet love, he even told me if I lost weight he would marry me. LOL, and did I no. I continued my battle with weight, I kept it to 200lbs. My father got cancer and fought for three years. When he passed away, I promised to keep my mother and watch over her. That wasnt hard, my mom and I was close.
My boyfriend at the time turned out to be the man I married and he liked my mom and we all lived together. The income together and working out the chores was good. I started somewhere in my head to lose weight. I lost around 120lbs and kept it off for about 10 years. I had a baby and even quit smoking. I learned to eat healthy and exercise. Then I was in an accident, hurting my neck and back. I was only able to work, nothing else. I started putting on weight, and my marriage started going down hill. I had always worked two jobs and I just couldnt keep up with everything I guess. I went back up to 200lbs and stayed there for a long time, got a divorce. Moved and continued working two jobs. Went up to 240lbs over the next 5 yrs. Then I decided 2003 to move and take another job went up to 280lbs, then 2005 lost 80lbs and 2006 gained that 80lbs back, when my mother almost died and I was demoted at work because of a co-worker making a sexual comment. Yes, I was the one removed from the dept, and not him. Then 1-07, is when it was discovered I have ptc/ih, fluid on the brain. Where my neurologist feels my estrogen receptors are producing too much estrogen which is causing the excess fluid. I have had from May to Dec 2007, 6 lp shunt surgeries. My neurosurgeon in Scarborough, Me is the best!!
I wouldnt have anyone else operate on me. I am able to work, thanks to him. The meds, spinal taps didnt work for me, I wasnt able to work. I coudnt risk losing my job. I am current waiting my lap band surgery 6-10-08. I am doing the pre op diet.
7-20-08 Sunday
I havent figured out how to blog. So, I am adding here. I am according to my new scales, digital down to 249.5lbs this am. My highest this year was 290lb, I will find out tomorrow what my weight was when I first started w/the bariatric center this Spring. I had surgery 6-10-08, two days after I started walking the treadmill at about 1.5mph and as of today I am still at 30 mins but at 2.2mph. I am still having a lot of head pain/headaches, because of the pressure of the PTC. I am lucky it comes and goes enough so it hasnt interferred with work. That of course cant happen, being out of work so much last year really hurt and almost cost me my job and then taking the time off for the band, used up all my full sick time so now I have to work a full month to earn anytime back. Of course I am very thankful that I am working!! I am also very thankful that I am walking again, I use to walk for hours and never thought there would come a day when I wouldnt be able to walk, even as heavy as I got, I could make myself walk even for 30 mins. But, when I was struck w/PTC, that all changed. My life stopped, there was pain like I never imagined, there are times even now, I wonder if I will ever be without pain, I long for the day that I will be pain free. I started my monthly and I am just having really bad pain, stomach, nausea and think it must be that and am not hungry. Going from bed to couch and doing only what needs to be done. Have follow up appt with Dr Wolfe tomorrow post op. Probably wont get a fill, only eating 3 meals a day. Not hungry, but waiting for the hungry to start, this is unusal from what I read from the posts. But, maybe once the monthly is over then things will change. I dont mind not thinking about food. very nice. I so appreciate the people on the OH support groups they are friendly and nice. They share so much.
Well, I guess this is all I will post for today, I am going to go listen to my Lap Band Success cd's that I got to help with my head hungry, along with Beck book.
My family, my mother and daughter are visiting family in CA, while I am home working!! Its ok, they deserve time much needed time away from me, since being sick I havent been the nicest or easiest person to live with but I sure hope to get back to myself.
Monday 7-21-08 Dr appt
I went for my post op appt, 6 wks since surgery. I had seen the dr 6-23-08 for an unfill of 1cc and other than that everything was fine.
Yesterday I ck'd in at the dr office and was told to go the bariactric center which is same building different section. I checked in there and meet the nurse. Which I love the nurse, very nice. She told me that unless there is a problem, I just meet with her and we decide if I need a fill. I had told her that the port site felt funny, it hurt and had a air bubble feel, but I didnt want to come in until my appt, which she said was fine. So, I was weighed, lost 10lbs since my last visit. She is teaching surgical residence to do the unfills so if patience go to the emergency room they can do it, also emergency room nurses and nurses on the different floors of the hospital. Anyway, the surgical res wasnt great at getting into my port, but he did locate a bubble of fluid and remove that, which the nurse said was probably the feeling I was getting. (Since the removal, no port pain!!) Anyway, she said I had 1cc in and put in 2cc, so I have 3cc in a 10cc band. She said they do fills every two weeks, but not sooner than that, but she will be out until Aug, so I wont be able to get a fill until 8-9-08. Then I meet with the nut and her and see if I need a fill, She said from now I let them know when I need a fill they do not contact me. She gave me a card to go by, the colors.
Sunday 8-24-08
Have been doing well with the headaches-head pain/earahes/ringing. As long as I didnt push the exercise. I pushed it once with trying to lift weights - just 3 sets of 12 reps of 3 lbs of triceps extentions and same number of bicep curls and the pressure increased for days. I only took my usual day off per week of rest and went back to walking. Not without the pain and pressure, but it was bareable. Then I had to go and increase the speed and time the sameday. Will I ever learn? only a week later. Just to mess the pressure up again. The pressure hadnt even stettled at that point. Sorry about the spelling, since the brain disorder, I am not good at spelling anymore, the harder I try to remember words, the worse the headache gets or causes one. Well, after this dumb stunt, I took my normal day off, and still continue to walk, and am working overtime, they are actually offering ot and of course I am taking it!! I made it through the week and for whatever reason I only upped the time yesterday and bam, bam it hit bad!! yesterday......... I was sick with pain..... I havent been this way since surgery...... but I have to realize that even with surgery and losing weight, that I am not cured and I am not at this time in remission. I am going to have bad days and I am still going to be waiting for the day of no pain. But, I am still thankful everyday for where I am since the surgery of the band, not sure how much is from not eating junk food, from weight loss, but I figured its to it all of it!! So, I continue not eating junk food, fatty food and following the band rules and continue walking!!! Maybe I have the pain so that I dont forget and go back to my old ways....... that I continue on to the good things, the right things with the band........
I am very thankful for the OH website and the members there, for their support and posts!!! That is where I go for my support and helpful info and of course I do have a wonderful nurse/Sharon at the bariatric center in Portland, their office staff are wonderful!! My mother and daughter are both very supportive and helpful, but to have people that have been there posting and sharing is so helpful, the people that just had surgery with me and the newbies. Its like family, they know what you are going through and how you feel. I have meet some wonderful people there and have been blessed knowing them. No matter where I am in life the good, the bad, no matter what I am dealt, I know I am there for a reason, I dont know what or why, but that isnt always for me to know. (if ever.. lol) But, I know that I will be alright for I am not alone, my God is with me. I always have everyone here at WLS in my thoughts and prayers each day. Because they are dear to my heart. Well, its time for me to go do that treadmill.
My daughter who is 17, goes back to school Wed. Because of me being so sick last year and she was very sick, the school didnt help her get the need school work so she didnt fall behind, she is repeating her Jr year. But, she is strong and will do a great job. I am very proud of her for not giving up. And standing behind me through the WLS, she knows I could lose the weight before my illness but had gained and couldnt lose it because I wasnt able to exercise and of course regain it. At first she was scared for me to have it, but after 6 surgeries last year and still no real relief of chronic pain, she knew it was my last hope for a normal life. I wasnt interested in brain surgery and no guarantees that would help either.
My mom who is 73 is a wonderful woman, who fights everyday to be with us. She has copd, emphysma, chronic asthma. She is on oxygen, nebulizer and every med you can imagine. She has lately been filling up with fluid. She walks everyday on a treadmill. I bought her one years ago and make sure she has it, so she can walk, this year when she went to Califonia she even went to a gym and the mall to walk so she got in her walking! I had promised my dad when he passed away from cancer 1986 that I would take care of her, well of course she wasnt sick then, but we lived together and when I married my husband loved her and she stayed with us. She helped me raise my daugher while I was married and of course after. So, we have three generations of woman in our home!! oh yes it is so much fun.......lol my mom had me at 28 and I had my daughter at 28.
Well, I have been rambling but wanted to share some of my family in case anyone read about me here, I am normally a private person.
Hope everyone has a wonderful day!!!
I have added to following to help explained or describe what PTC/IIH is.....
*What is Intracranial Hypertension?
Intracranial Hypertension often initially presents as an extremely painful and disabling headache due to high pressure levels of cerebro-spinal fluid (CSF) within the head. At this time it's unknown if this is caused by excess production of CSF or malabsorption of CSF. IH can result in permanent loss of vision and even blindness as a result of pressure on the Optic Nerve (papilledema).
According to limited research IH is a rare condition affecting approximately one to two people of 100,000, most often women. The percentage is higher in overweight females. Typical onset is the child-bearing years in females. Recent weight gain has been associated with IH in some patients. It is important to note IH is not limited to the above criteria (males, children, and females of average weight are also affected). Diagnosis and treatment often present a challenge to those outside the textbook norm due to limited research and outdated information. If you are an IH patient, participation in the IH Registry is vital to understanding this condition with the current medical technology we posses.
There are two forms of IH: Primary (PIH) and Secondary (SIH). In PIH there is no known cause. With SIH there is an identifiable causative agent such as underlying disease, an intracranial blood clot, or certain drugs and medications. With both, IH occurs spontaneously and no one has yet found out why.
No one knows why IH happens, only that in some cases certain factors seem to contribute to it. This is one of the vital questions that needs to be answered before a cure is found. Current research favors the theory that there is a resistance or obstruction to the Cerebral Spinal Fluid (CSF) outflow through the existing pathways of the brain. The sad fact is, in over 100 years of it being identified, there hasn't been any in depth research on this condition or treatments developed specifically to target IH (all were developed to treat other disorders).
http://groups.msn.com/pseudotumorcerebri/messageboards.msnw
