beast2beauty

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Well it has been a little over six months and what can I say...I am finally living my life! For so long I sat on the couch and felt sorry for myself and "wished"  that I could be thinner and do all the things I wanted to do like play with my kids and go on a roller coaster or plane without fear that the seatbelt won't fit. Well I stopped "wishing" and started DOING and here I am!! I have lost a total of 105lbs so far and I am still losing. Slowly but that's ok. We are going on a cruise in June and taking the kids to Universal Studios and for the first time I am not going to worry about one single thing...instead I am going to enjoy what is important, spending time with my family and enjoying my kids! My weight has gotten enough of my time and energy!!
I have went from a size 26 to size 11. I can even wear my daughters size 11 juniors! Woot Woot!! But it is much harder now. I can eat so much more now and it is a little scary. But I take each day one at a time. I have that fear I know everyone has that i will gain it all back. Sometimes I drean that I am huge again and I am thrilled when I wake up! But I know that that does happen and it terrifies me! But all I can do is live for today and focus on making the right decisions. In the meantime...I am going to enjoy everyday I am given!!

Wow! Been awhile since I wrote. Well I am now down to 185. So that is what...61 lbs lost since surgery and 74 since i started this journey. So not too bad. Feeling better, but still nauseated alot. Still not getting in enough protein and viatimins are a atruggle. So I am def not the poster child for this surgery. But I try hard everyday to do what is right.
Getting ready for Christmas which is not the same this year. My grandma won't be here for the first time and my cousin is in the hospital with only days to live...so it's gonna be a pretty depressing year.
So nothin muh goin on. Just still moving in to the new house and getting adjusted. Hopefully soon I will wake up and feel "normal" like I hear so many people say!

So today I went to my first Dr.'s appt since my surgery. I am down 15.5 lbs, so I am pretty happy with that. Still though, she told me today that I would probably lose 7 to 10 lbs a month. That doesn't sound like a lot to me! I mean, I can lose that in a week on a low carb diet. But then again, I would just gain it back, soooo, I guess I will just take it as it comes and enjoy the fact that I was lucky enough to have had this.
Went back to work yesterday. Pretty uneventful. Was a little tired, but all in all, not a bad day. Dreading tomorrow though. I have to work 10 hrs and I know I am gonna drop when I get home.
I am gonna try and find my Richard Simmons dvd's and start exercising to them. Laugh if you will, but he works your butt off and it is in the privacy of my home. So I don't feel bad if I need to sit and take a break.
Gettting plenty of water in. Still not eating much. and so protein is not going as well as it should. But today I bought some unflavored protein mix from Clarian, so I am gonna start adding that to my food, so hopefully that will come.
I was really wanting to be below 200 by Thanksgiving, but not sure if that is gonna happen. That means I would have to lose 25 lbs in like 7 weeks...I guess all I can do is try!!
Starting "soft foods" next Monday. Not sure how I feel about that. Food is still gonna be bland. And I hate meat, sooo it is gonna be a struggle. But hey, when is weight loss not a struggle! :)

So a week ago today I forever changed my life. Scary? yes. A good choice? Absolutely! I am feeling pretty good. Still sore, but getting better everyday. It is still a struggle with eating and drinking, but again, getting better everyday. I went to the store today and did a little grocery shopping for my family. It is absolutely beautiful outside!! 66 degrees and sunny. I love fall. But getting out of the house really made me feel more "normal". I am really drained alot, but I am sure that the more  nutrients i can get in me, the better that i will feel.
I am starting pureed diet tomorrow and I am really excited to eat refried beans. Heck, I'm excited to eat anything I dont have to drink HAHA
I am down to 227, which is huge for me. that is only 8 lbs since surgery, but 38 lbs since my highest weight, so I am really excited to go forward. I can already tell a difference in my face!!

So this is day 5 post-op....still feeling yucky. Can't really drink anything without it hurting or gurgling. Seems mostly like water hurts me more than anything. However, I am getting a little better with each passing day! Really struggling with the protein thing. Everything is gaggy. God I sound like a baby...but I just keep reminding myself that I have read a lot of blogs on here that started out very similar to mine and then ended up being my insperation, and Iknow someday that will be me!!

It's odd knowing that I have finally had this procedure done. I have wanted it for soooooooooo long, that now that it has actually happened, i still find it hard to believe. Even though I have the pain to prove it lol But mostly I am just grateful that my life is finally heading in a direction that I want it to go in. Finally I can say "when I lose the weight" and know that really is going to be a reality for me!!!!

Wishing you all the success in this journey and thankful everyday for having OH!!!

Sooo, this is my 4th day post=op. Came home last night. I just want to say real quick that I had my surgery done at the Clarian North hospital in Indianapols and you couldn't have asked for nicer people. Fom the Dr.s right on down to the housekeeping. I have never in my life been treated so well, so i highly recommend them if you are in that area and are considering this.
Well today will be my first day home. I am a little nervous and in more pain than I thought I would be in. Not really sure what I was excpecting, but I'll live I am sure of it ! :) I think most of the pain I am having is gas pain???? It's so weird to have all this rumbling and pain goin on in my stomach, but not really sure what it is coming from. I also had to have my gallblader out so i have major bm's hope that goes away soon too. I find it very hard to swallow anything, everyitme i swallow even water,, if fell instant discomfort. almost like gas is trying to come up while the water is going down..???? again, not sure what the pain is, just know that i have it lol
However, besides all of that, I am feeling very optamistic and excited to finally be on the losing side!!  
I just want everyone to know that this website has been and will continue to be my saving grace!! I wish you all the luck and I am here to cheer you all on!!!!

BTW, havent wighed yet, still bloated from surgery, so i fugure I will weigh in maybe Monday? That will be one week out

I was on here 2 years ago in hopes of haveing this surery. Well, FINALLY , I am!!
So my story is pretty much like most others on here. I have always struggled with my weight. Been on numerous diets. Lost and gained, lost and gained and so on....But Not Anymore:) I am officially having the RNY a week from tomorrow!!!  I have wanted this for sooo long, and now that it is finally here, I am feeling excited, happy, nervous, scared and many other feelings I really didn't espect to have.
I am a 34 year old  mother of 2 girls. Married to a great guy who loves me thick or thin. But I don't love me, and that is the problem that I am gonna try to fix. I am doing this to get healthier, but I am not gonna lie, I want to look good too!!! I want to go into the stores and be able to look at something cute and NOT think, well if I were smaller, I would wear that! I want to be able to go to an amusement park and get on the rides with my kids without fearing the seatbelt won't fit. As many of you have I am sure done, I too have put off sooooo much living because I am fat. And I don't want to waste one more day of my childrens lives hiding. I want to get out and live while I can!!
I know several people who have had this done. I know it will not be easy. But the pay off is great! I get my life back !!