I'm approved!

Nov 07, 2012

I'm not even sure how to express what I'm feeling. I've worked so hard to get here, this moment and I'm finally here and it feels...surreal. I'm approved. This is REALLY going to happen. Although I've gone through SO much the past 6 months to make it happen, I still think the majority of me still didn't think it would happen. I still thought something would get in my way. A huge fear was always insurance, especially since the last few months I was told how difficult my insurance was to approve surgery. I was pretty much expecting a denial. But it didn't come, and here I am- this official now...and now the fears are sinking in.

I had my final pre op with the surgeon's office yesterday. I talked with the surgeon for the last time. Surgey was set for November 14th, but we still had yet to submit to insurance. I felt we were cutting it very close- 1 week for approval I felt was way too short of a time frame. I was afraid it would never come in time. After my pre op yesterday they apparently submitted. This morning I had to go in for pre op testing, blood work, chest X ray, talk to the anesthesiologist etc. While I'm there waiting to have my blood drawn I was in the office of the pre op admission area and the finance coordinator walked in. He gave me a look and asked me 'What's your name?' I told him and he apparently recognized me and he said 'Oh you know they approved your surgery?' I was taken so off guard! I never expected to hear this, I didn't even know they had submitted yet (I thought they woul submit today) I was like 'THEY DID?' I tried to contain myself but I wanted to jump up and down right there in the pre op testing room lol. He went and double checked, came back and said 'Yes, they just left a message saying you were approved' I am STILL in complete and utter SHOCK!!! SO happy!

So now, this is real. That was the last piece of the puzzle and it's all there. And now the normal pre op fears can set in. I hadn't felt ANY fear for the surgery up until today, because I was so busy worrying about approval and had convinced myself fear was silly because I didn't know if this would even go through. But now the actual surgery is all that I have left to fear. Trying very hard to fight those thoughts lol.

Everything else is all set. I do have to do one final pre op- upper GI series on Friday. This was a last minute addition to my pre op testing and this almost slowed down my surgery, thank GOODNESS the nurse practitioner is on top of things and was able to get me in for Friday. So I'm going to just try my best to enjoy my weekend and not have anxiety over everything. I've come SO far, I CAN DO THIS! I've wanted this surgery for SO long! I've literally been looking into these options since I was 14, far too young to even have bariatric surgery. I almost had the lap band when I was 16, though I'm grateful things didn't work out because I wasn't ready for it. Then when I was 18 I almost went for RNY, but again I don't think I was ready. But NOW I am ready, I can feel it. I've been on OH since 2005- 7 years in the making and its FINALLY time for my journey to start. It's an emotional feeling, but I'm SO ready. I just need to keep telling myself its MY time, and this is right so the nerves settle down.

One week! I can do this!

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