Almost time to start my new life!

Feb 27, 2012

Okay, I'll be at the hospital in 5 1/2 hours! My house is pretty much in order. I buzzed around this house most of the past few days, but especially today. Vacuumed my room, straightened, cleared out some piles, cleared some things out of my son's room (he comes home from college for spring break on Friday w00t). Also did laundry. It's still spinning!

Have my little bags packed (one is the hospital plastic bag, the other is an adorable extra-large cosmetic bag with a blue animal print =] that says FIRST CLASS ONLY! on the front). Not taking much.

The Hubs seems all ready to take over the reins. I know I'm going to be sleepy (meaning ASLEEP) when we leave home at 5 AM to get to the hospital at 5:30 AM. All I know is, 2/28 is now my new birth day!

So many thoughts have been going through my head today. A major one is that I'm leaving my father behind. He was horrible to me as a child (& adult). I'm the only one of my siblings (there are 5 of us) who looks like him & is heavy like he was. When I looked in the mirror, I saw him.

But no more. I forgive you, dad, I release all ties I have to you & to the victim you made me. I cut the cords of what you did to me when I was young; I won't let the hurt in my past define me ANY MORE.

Today I start my new life! The past is past. It does NOT define who I am TODAY. The future is unknown. I am living for this moment. That's the moment we live for: right now. It's in this present moment where I find peace.

Love, GG  

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