hopeful9
focus 4-29-2011
Apr 30, 2011
Hi everyone,
It's almost may. I'm a year out on May 11th. I'm down 125 pounds. I was down 118 at the beginning of the year. Can you say 'loosing focus and pushing the boundries of the rules." Well slap my backside and get back on the horse. I have been back in the saddle for a week now. I had 3 really awful weeks of eating...really awful. I don't dump, but I do still have restriction.
I have 70 pounds to go and I won't give up. I just had a great talk with my "surgery sister'. She really helped me. She has some of the same struggles but is doing great. I feel much better and am ready to get on with my loss. no more practicing maintenence. It's been a much harder journey that I thought it would be but it's been such a learning experience about me.
I'll check back soon and update.
0 comments
It's almost may. I'm a year out on May 11th. I'm down 125 pounds. I was down 118 at the beginning of the year. Can you say 'loosing focus and pushing the boundries of the rules." Well slap my backside and get back on the horse. I have been back in the saddle for a week now. I had 3 really awful weeks of eating...really awful. I don't dump, but I do still have restriction.
I have 70 pounds to go and I won't give up. I just had a great talk with my "surgery sister'. She really helped me. She has some of the same struggles but is doing great. I feel much better and am ready to get on with my loss. no more practicing maintenence. It's been a much harder journey that I thought it would be but it's been such a learning experience about me.
I'll check back soon and update.
Halloween
Oct 31, 2010
It's been a long while since I blogged. First off I have to say that I feel much, much better. I found a new job and I have to run up and down a full flight of stairs about 5 times a day. I can actually 'trot' up them. I don't have to go up with one foot and then bring the second to the same step. I actually don't have to use the hand rail to come down and sometimes even bounce down the stairs. My knees still 'talk' to me but they don't scream anymore.
I went into the city, Chicago, to go on a ghost tour with my Goddaughter. The pick-up point was Rock and Roll McDonald's. After the tour my dear GD said, lets walk back to the train station. OK....1.7 miles. It would have killed me last year. Don't know if I could have done it. On a good day in the right chair I can actually cross my legs, I only weigh about 12 pounds more than when I got married. (1988) I was a pretty big bride but then managed to gain about 110 pounds. I'm down to 5 prescriptions from 12 and I'm smaller now than my Hubby and oldest son. My diabetes is much improved but not gone but I still have 70 pounds to go. I'm really not perfect at this. My sin list is I don't always get my water in, I'm usually close. I sometimes eat to fast and don't chew well enough, and then I usually barf. I have caffeine, daily coffee and iced tea. I'm sporadic about exercise since I got my job. I occasionally have a few taco chips and guacamole. I eat a few potato chips if I'm at a party and I occasional have a few handfuls of movie popcorn at the theater. I sometimes eat too many nuts. I snack at night.
What I do right, I almost always get in all of my protein, I stay off the couch, I do walk a lot more, I don't drink when I eat and I wait for at least 30 minutes afterward. ( I forgot once before
nd that's a hurtin' belly!!) I don't drink diet pop, I avoid sugar like the plague, I'm great about my multi-vitamins, I'm getting more sleep, I don't drink alcohol and I'm doing my best to stay positive. I go to group meetings, they are the best!!! I'm really trying to figure out why I eat when I'm not hungry and I'm doing a better job at reading myself.
Things I'm going to improve this week.
get in my walking and weights. Do the interval thing with my walking.
only eat planned snacks at night if at all
Lay off potato chips until goal
limit coffee to 2 a day. One with protein and one without.
get my water in better.
Enough blogging for now....I need to blog to remember....I don't want to forget what I went through, or how far I've come.
I'm learning to love me more. Not because I'm thinner, but because I'm kinder to myself. I've stopped judging my self so harshly. I'm beginning to see the magnificence of me..we all are magnificent. The moment is now.....
0 comments
I went into the city, Chicago, to go on a ghost tour with my Goddaughter. The pick-up point was Rock and Roll McDonald's. After the tour my dear GD said, lets walk back to the train station. OK....1.7 miles. It would have killed me last year. Don't know if I could have done it. On a good day in the right chair I can actually cross my legs, I only weigh about 12 pounds more than when I got married. (1988) I was a pretty big bride but then managed to gain about 110 pounds. I'm down to 5 prescriptions from 12 and I'm smaller now than my Hubby and oldest son. My diabetes is much improved but not gone but I still have 70 pounds to go. I'm really not perfect at this. My sin list is I don't always get my water in, I'm usually close. I sometimes eat to fast and don't chew well enough, and then I usually barf. I have caffeine, daily coffee and iced tea. I'm sporadic about exercise since I got my job. I occasionally have a few taco chips and guacamole. I eat a few potato chips if I'm at a party and I occasional have a few handfuls of movie popcorn at the theater. I sometimes eat too many nuts. I snack at night.
What I do right, I almost always get in all of my protein, I stay off the couch, I do walk a lot more, I don't drink when I eat and I wait for at least 30 minutes afterward. ( I forgot once before
nd that's a hurtin' belly!!) I don't drink diet pop, I avoid sugar like the plague, I'm great about my multi-vitamins, I'm getting more sleep, I don't drink alcohol and I'm doing my best to stay positive. I go to group meetings, they are the best!!! I'm really trying to figure out why I eat when I'm not hungry and I'm doing a better job at reading myself.
Things I'm going to improve this week.
get in my walking and weights. Do the interval thing with my walking.
only eat planned snacks at night if at all
Lay off potato chips until goal
limit coffee to 2 a day. One with protein and one without.
get my water in better.
Enough blogging for now....I need to blog to remember....I don't want to forget what I went through, or how far I've come.
I'm learning to love me more. Not because I'm thinner, but because I'm kinder to myself. I've stopped judging my self so harshly. I'm beginning to see the magnificence of me..we all are magnificent. The moment is now.....
3 weeks post op
May 31, 2010
It's been a while so here goes!! I had my surgery and must say it was harder than I thought it would be. 2 nights in the hospital that I don't remember much of. I do remember being very uncomfortable and wishing they had a more comfortable chair for me to sit in. The ones they had for visitors had bouncy backs and at my size I sit and it'd lean me way back. ouch. So I had to wedge the chair up against the wall. For the first 4 days home I took my liquid vicodin pretty regularly except at night and could really tell when I was due to take it. again ouch. I stressed because I filled my drain for the first 5 days and it only began to slow down the day before I got it out. I was sure I'd need more surgery because I was bleeding too much. Silly me, the next day out came the staples and the drain. It was a little pinchy but didn't hurt. (one staple was killer. The skin had started growing over it.)
I already feel so much better!! My mind is so much clearer than it has been for years!!! I'm off of half of my old meds and 2 that I'm still taking are a much smaller dose. I thought I was getting alzeimers but after talking to the pharmacist he said with all of the meds I was taking it could have fogged me up. I feel so much better already. I walk everyday. Saturday my oldest boy graduated from High School. I walked from the parking lot to the football field and up the bleachers, in the heat, without getting winded! It's like a miracle.
We sat for 3 hours in the heat and while I was hot and did get a bit too much sun..especially on my part, I wasn't 'dying' and didn't end up with a headache and just being plain miserable. I actually enjoyed the rest of the day! The next day I was a teeny bit stiff but this time last year I would have woken up feeling crippled and miserable.
I'm also stressing about the scale. It doesn't seem to be moving as fast as my surgeon seems to think it should be and that's stressing me. I think I'm doing everything right but will double check with the nutritionist. I know I'm early out but this may be the best thing I've ever done. So that's where I'm at right now!
Need to stop stressing about the scale and just keep on, keeping on.
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I already feel so much better!! My mind is so much clearer than it has been for years!!! I'm off of half of my old meds and 2 that I'm still taking are a much smaller dose. I thought I was getting alzeimers but after talking to the pharmacist he said with all of the meds I was taking it could have fogged me up. I feel so much better already. I walk everyday. Saturday my oldest boy graduated from High School. I walked from the parking lot to the football field and up the bleachers, in the heat, without getting winded! It's like a miracle.
We sat for 3 hours in the heat and while I was hot and did get a bit too much sun..especially on my part, I wasn't 'dying' and didn't end up with a headache and just being plain miserable. I actually enjoyed the rest of the day! The next day I was a teeny bit stiff but this time last year I would have woken up feeling crippled and miserable.
I'm also stressing about the scale. It doesn't seem to be moving as fast as my surgeon seems to think it should be and that's stressing me. I think I'm doing everything right but will double check with the nutritionist. I know I'm early out but this may be the best thing I've ever done. So that's where I'm at right now!
Need to stop stressing about the scale and just keep on, keeping on.
six more days!!
May 04, 2010
May 5Th, 2010
Hey everyone. I have made it through 5 days of my pre-surgical diet. I have done really well, OK, the first 2 days I felt like dog-doo. Man, the headache the end of the first day was killer. It seems like pain makes me doubt myself about this decision. I'll need to remember that for when I'm having buyers remorse after surgery. I'm glad my surgeon lets us have some fruit pre-op. Blackberries have become my yum food. I'm actually getting a bit burned out on chocolate protein powder. Down the road I'll have to investigate some new brands. I don't have a scale at home that's dependable but seem to be down a couple of pounds. I have been really nervous about the whole surgery thing up until recently, now I'm just at peace with it. Not that 'those thoughts' don't creep in but I just don't give those thoughts any power. I guess I was afraid of any future surgeries from strictures, or obstructions. Frankly, if I don't loose weight surgeries are certainly in my future if I even would have a future. I know this fight will not be fought with out a few battle scars but they will be marks of bravery and fight. I didn't think I had any fight left in me but oh man, I'm starting to feel spunky again. I'm going to be fierce minus 140 pounds!!! I'll probably not look too bad either.(with clothes anyway!
) Well dear friends, thanks for being here!
Hugs, Liz
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Hey everyone. I have made it through 5 days of my pre-surgical diet. I have done really well, OK, the first 2 days I felt like dog-doo. Man, the headache the end of the first day was killer. It seems like pain makes me doubt myself about this decision. I'll need to remember that for when I'm having buyers remorse after surgery. I'm glad my surgeon lets us have some fruit pre-op. Blackberries have become my yum food. I'm actually getting a bit burned out on chocolate protein powder. Down the road I'll have to investigate some new brands. I don't have a scale at home that's dependable but seem to be down a couple of pounds. I have been really nervous about the whole surgery thing up until recently, now I'm just at peace with it. Not that 'those thoughts' don't creep in but I just don't give those thoughts any power. I guess I was afraid of any future surgeries from strictures, or obstructions. Frankly, if I don't loose weight surgeries are certainly in my future if I even would have a future. I know this fight will not be fought with out a few battle scars but they will be marks of bravery and fight. I didn't think I had any fight left in me but oh man, I'm starting to feel spunky again. I'm going to be fierce minus 140 pounds!!! I'll probably not look too bad either.(with clothes anyway!
) Well dear friends, thanks for being here!Hugs, Liz
My Liquid 10 days starts tomorrow!!
Apr 30, 2010
Hey all,
It's April 30th, 2010. I'm starting my liquid liver shrinking diet tomorrow. I can't believe I have a question. I thought I had asked and learned the answer to every possible question. I'll find the answer...do I mix the protein drink with water or skim milk. The container has both options...I'll ask my support group girls, they'll know.
I'm feeling very at peace with this decision, finally. I've had my goodbye to food in the 'use it as a drug' way and am now about to be reborn. My new pouch already has a name, (corny I know) but it is by the Grace of God that everything is coming together for my surgery and one of my main goals with this surgery is to feel better so I can feel joyful again. So Gracie Joy. My friend V. gave me the idea. My new pouch is like a little baby and what would you feed a little one. You start easy and work up to only healthy nutritious foods. She'll be vunerable at first, ever so fragile and I need to take good care of her. Like any child, she and I'll have our moments but we'll mean the world to each other. I can't believe it's only 11 days away!!
I'll be nesting over the next 10 days. I have the help of my sister and some friends, I'm very blessed to have so many people who love me. I was very fearful up until this week and now I just feel peaceful about all of it. My hubby is saying he'll be supportive, and he is but he is usually good out of the gate and then when it gets old to him, he'll be irritating about it. For the first time it won't be all about him. I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt but I'm not going to be upset if he gets pissy about it. This is my time and I'm taking it. My boys are great teenagers...they will help when it's crunch time and they are very nurturing and loving. So my ten days begin tomorrow and I know they'll be tough but I'm ready for them!!! Peace to any who read all of this!!! Lizbeth
0 comments
It's April 30th, 2010. I'm starting my liquid liver shrinking diet tomorrow. I can't believe I have a question. I thought I had asked and learned the answer to every possible question. I'll find the answer...do I mix the protein drink with water or skim milk. The container has both options...I'll ask my support group girls, they'll know.
I'm feeling very at peace with this decision, finally. I've had my goodbye to food in the 'use it as a drug' way and am now about to be reborn. My new pouch already has a name, (corny I know) but it is by the Grace of God that everything is coming together for my surgery and one of my main goals with this surgery is to feel better so I can feel joyful again. So Gracie Joy. My friend V. gave me the idea. My new pouch is like a little baby and what would you feed a little one. You start easy and work up to only healthy nutritious foods. She'll be vunerable at first, ever so fragile and I need to take good care of her. Like any child, she and I'll have our moments but we'll mean the world to each other. I can't believe it's only 11 days away!!
I'll be nesting over the next 10 days. I have the help of my sister and some friends, I'm very blessed to have so many people who love me. I was very fearful up until this week and now I just feel peaceful about all of it. My hubby is saying he'll be supportive, and he is but he is usually good out of the gate and then when it gets old to him, he'll be irritating about it. For the first time it won't be all about him. I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt but I'm not going to be upset if he gets pissy about it. This is my time and I'm taking it. My boys are great teenagers...they will help when it's crunch time and they are very nurturing and loving. So my ten days begin tomorrow and I know they'll be tough but I'm ready for them!!! Peace to any who read all of this!!! Lizbeth
2 weeks til surgery
Apr 26, 2010
I can't believe it's going to happen! I've been nervous about the surgery and having trouble saying good bye to foods. Foods I normally don't even eat. I'm investigating that I may be a control freak. I certainly was raised by a food control freak, so maybe it's not me being controlling, maybe I'm rebelling!? Now that over eating is habit and soothing and a way to procrastinate, my relationship with food needs to be stripped down and become what it is meant to be. Nourishment for my body. It's also meant to be enjoyed but some foods control me!!! Trigger foods for me are bananas, cereal, donuts, chocolate, white bread, IE pizza, burgers and chips...more carbs. I start my liquid diet on Saturday, I started very low carb today to try to minimize the headaches. I went up a few pounds saying goodbye to foods, but I'm still less than when I began this whole thing. I'll be down again by surgery. Today it was like someone flipped a switch and my brain just said 'your done being foolish with food, you've chosen a new life, with new rules and I'm going to work the heck out of it.!! I will be positive about all outcomes and I will make new choices and I will never, ever forget how miserable I have been the last few years.
I hate that I can't run up a flight of stairs, ride a horse or a bike, I hate that I strain to fasten seat belts and that I can't fit into all of the restaurant booths without my boobs sitting on the table. I hate that people stare or ignore me and I hate that some people out there think I'm undisciplined, lazy, and a self indulgent person. Or that I'm weak. I hate that my back always hurts and that I have to do crazy contortions to wipe my arse. I hate that I couldn't keep up with my family at Disney. I hate that I can't shoot hoops with my son. I hate that my teenage son's feel like they have to protect my feelings. I hate not fitting into roller coasters. I HATE being diabetic. I poke my self 4 times a day to test, 5 times a day for shots. I hate the mood swings that come with the blood sugar swings. I hate feeling like I'm the cause for my children's obesity. I hate not being able to walk the dogs or pull weeds. I hate that I'm always tired, I hate that I don't feel sexy anymore and I hate that I don't recognize me in the mirror anymore. I hate that I have to take 11 prescriptions and pay for them. I hate the impending feeling of doom about being fat and how it's killing me. That's just a whole lot of hate and hurt. No wonder I struggle with depression and motivation!!
I'll love less pain and more joy and being healthier and more active. I do really love me right now but I feel bad for me...I'm a really nice, kind, loving person and I've got myself into a pickle...the obesity pickle, the proverbial rock and hard place and I'm grateful for the tool of RNY. Oh yeah, I want to cross my legs!!!
whew....I've been meaning to write this list...it's freeing and motivating. If anyone read through this drivel, God Bless. My adventure continues.....
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I hate that I can't run up a flight of stairs, ride a horse or a bike, I hate that I strain to fasten seat belts and that I can't fit into all of the restaurant booths without my boobs sitting on the table. I hate that people stare or ignore me and I hate that some people out there think I'm undisciplined, lazy, and a self indulgent person. Or that I'm weak. I hate that my back always hurts and that I have to do crazy contortions to wipe my arse. I hate that I couldn't keep up with my family at Disney. I hate that I can't shoot hoops with my son. I hate that my teenage son's feel like they have to protect my feelings. I hate not fitting into roller coasters. I HATE being diabetic. I poke my self 4 times a day to test, 5 times a day for shots. I hate the mood swings that come with the blood sugar swings. I hate feeling like I'm the cause for my children's obesity. I hate not being able to walk the dogs or pull weeds. I hate that I'm always tired, I hate that I don't feel sexy anymore and I hate that I don't recognize me in the mirror anymore. I hate that I have to take 11 prescriptions and pay for them. I hate the impending feeling of doom about being fat and how it's killing me. That's just a whole lot of hate and hurt. No wonder I struggle with depression and motivation!!
I'll love less pain and more joy and being healthier and more active. I do really love me right now but I feel bad for me...I'm a really nice, kind, loving person and I've got myself into a pickle...the obesity pickle, the proverbial rock and hard place and I'm grateful for the tool of RNY. Oh yeah, I want to cross my legs!!!
whew....I've been meaning to write this list...it's freeing and motivating. If anyone read through this drivel, God Bless. My adventure continues.....
Used Clothing Sale
Apr 24, 2010
Today I went to my support groups clothing sale. I bought 3 pair of jeans, I currently wear a 26 or 28 and I bought one in a 26,24,and 22. I also got a pair of shorts in a 20. I can't believe they will ever fit. I'm functioning on pure faith here!! I also got 2 pairs of jammies in a 2x, although they look pretty small for an xx large. We'll see?! I went with my Sister and my new RNy buddy, G. The support group people were there and it was like a mini support group meeting. Very encouraging. Viv took pictures of me on her phone because she said you can never have too many before pics. I'm sure one day I'll look at them and it'll make me sad to see me this unhappy. My avatar Pic is 20 yrs old and 90 lbs thinner. I know I'll never be that young but I should end up thinner...It was a good day. Had dinner out with dear husband and really opened up about how bad I've been feeling the last few years. He was really supportive...he earns uber good hubby points tonight. (I think the part where my libido should come back really got his attention!) God Bless all who are reading.
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WTH new scale
Apr 17, 2010
I thought I'd better have a scale for home. My sister has a fancy one that measures fat, H2o,and such. She can't read the display and offered it to me. Well the dang scale is smarter than I am. I can get a weight but can't get the rest set. Maybe it can be a project when I'm recouping from surgery.
I took my son to a retreat on Friday night. We had to walk about one fifth of a mile. It was downhill there and I did fine. My knees did whisper to me their usual talk...too...much...weight..owie. This self whisper gets responded to by more self head talk. Sarcastically to self, "have another donut maybe you could stop and get the double dog meal, followed by a snickers bar or two. I am such a pig."
When I put it onto the printed page it's sad that I would treat myself that way, I would never think, let alone say it to anyone else. So now I have to leave and walk back up the hill. The self talk was positive until we hit the very large hill to the parking lot. The self talk started out much the same and then morphed into "omg are my lungs going to pop, my heart is going to pop out of my chest and now I scared I'm going to have 'the big one' right here at the camp. How long until they find my lifeless body. My children will be so traumatized. How could I have let myself get this big and out of shape. I'm an idiot. I make it to the car. I'm breathing as hard as I ever have. If I was with a group I couldn't even hide this heavy breathing. ( I've perfected the, no really I'm fine face and somehow manage to breath so as not to look like I'm about to expire.) I get to my truck, Praise the Lord and just stand there. Trying to regroup so I can step up onto the running board and into the truck. I get in the car and am having positive RNY thoughts. I tilt the vanity mirror to check to see if my lips are blue from lack of oxygen, whew, I just look like me only a little scared. On my drive home my thoughts go from, Silly girl, you were just thinking that maybe all of this surgery stuff wasn't really necessary, yeah right! To wondering if I am still going to have that heart attack or stroke. It's all insanity. When I got home I watched Jamie Olivers Food revolution. I wanted to hug him and tell him that he is the voice of sanity in this insane food world we live in. He is brilliant...and I'm grateful for him.
Most of all this morning I'm grateful that I finally have insurance that will cover wls and that I am almost to my surgery date. If anyone actually reads this, God Bless, because I am really verbose.
I'm also doing this as some therapy for me. When I extract things from my mind and put them on paper, so to speak, it really, really helps me focus and peel back all of the layers of my obesity disease. Not all my fault, but I did put every single bite into my mouth..I even chewed most of them. I didn't enjoy a lot of them but they did fill a void or created carb coma that would let me avoid unpleasant tasks. (like paying bills or should I say trying to figure out which bills I can pay this paycheck.) After all when your stuffed you can't clean out the garage or go for a walk. It really is craziness/ addiction. All I can say right now is God Bless Me and heal me. God Bless you and heal you, too.
0 comments
I took my son to a retreat on Friday night. We had to walk about one fifth of a mile. It was downhill there and I did fine. My knees did whisper to me their usual talk...too...much...weight..owie. This self whisper gets responded to by more self head talk. Sarcastically to self, "have another donut maybe you could stop and get the double dog meal, followed by a snickers bar or two. I am such a pig."
When I put it onto the printed page it's sad that I would treat myself that way, I would never think, let alone say it to anyone else. So now I have to leave and walk back up the hill. The self talk was positive until we hit the very large hill to the parking lot. The self talk started out much the same and then morphed into "omg are my lungs going to pop, my heart is going to pop out of my chest and now I scared I'm going to have 'the big one' right here at the camp. How long until they find my lifeless body. My children will be so traumatized. How could I have let myself get this big and out of shape. I'm an idiot. I make it to the car. I'm breathing as hard as I ever have. If I was with a group I couldn't even hide this heavy breathing. ( I've perfected the, no really I'm fine face and somehow manage to breath so as not to look like I'm about to expire.) I get to my truck, Praise the Lord and just stand there. Trying to regroup so I can step up onto the running board and into the truck. I get in the car and am having positive RNY thoughts. I tilt the vanity mirror to check to see if my lips are blue from lack of oxygen, whew, I just look like me only a little scared. On my drive home my thoughts go from, Silly girl, you were just thinking that maybe all of this surgery stuff wasn't really necessary, yeah right! To wondering if I am still going to have that heart attack or stroke. It's all insanity. When I got home I watched Jamie Olivers Food revolution. I wanted to hug him and tell him that he is the voice of sanity in this insane food world we live in. He is brilliant...and I'm grateful for him.
Most of all this morning I'm grateful that I finally have insurance that will cover wls and that I am almost to my surgery date. If anyone actually reads this, God Bless, because I am really verbose.
I'm also doing this as some therapy for me. When I extract things from my mind and put them on paper, so to speak, it really, really helps me focus and peel back all of the layers of my obesity disease. Not all my fault, but I did put every single bite into my mouth..I even chewed most of them. I didn't enjoy a lot of them but they did fill a void or created carb coma that would let me avoid unpleasant tasks. (like paying bills or should I say trying to figure out which bills I can pay this paycheck.) After all when your stuffed you can't clean out the garage or go for a walk. It really is craziness/ addiction. All I can say right now is God Bless Me and heal me. God Bless you and heal you, too.
I'm a couple of days post setting surgery date
Apr 14, 2010
April 14, 2010
I had an emotional day. I was way up after support group Monday and now today I emotionally pooped out. I was a slug most of the day, ate pretty well and now feel as if I'm bouncing back. Back in the saddle again. I didn't expect this much variation in how I feel....a big step no doubt. I'm feeling better and better about all of this and am getting through with help of my support group, my shrinking sisters N and G, and my sister. Who is struggling with her lap band. I know it'll be hard for her, seeing me loose fast with the RNY, but we're always there for each other. My DH and DS's are supportive as well. So what's my deal?!
I really do crack myself up
. I blog and I feel so much better. Well blessings to all who wander in here. Liz
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I had an emotional day. I was way up after support group Monday and now today I emotionally pooped out. I was a slug most of the day, ate pretty well and now feel as if I'm bouncing back. Back in the saddle again. I didn't expect this much variation in how I feel....a big step no doubt. I'm feeling better and better about all of this and am getting through with help of my support group, my shrinking sisters N and G, and my sister. Who is struggling with her lap band. I know it'll be hard for her, seeing me loose fast with the RNY, but we're always there for each other. My DH and DS's are supportive as well. So what's my deal?!
I really do crack myself up. I blog and I feel so much better. Well blessings to all who wander in here. Liz It was an approval letter and I have a date
Apr 12, 2010
I just scheduled my surgery. May 11Th. The day before my oldest boy turns 18. I expected the news of approval and ensuing surgery to make me feel really happy and excited! I feel nervous and it all feels a bit surreal. I didn't expect that 'balloon and confetti' feeling but I thought I feel a bit more excited than scared. I am committed to this. I want to be free of my 11 medications and I want to feel more free,not so surrounded by myself.
I'm grateful that support group meets tonight, I sure could use some. Of course what normal person would be excited about having their digestive system re-routed!It's the changes I am looking forward to. So here I am, one month away from my re-birth. Hey, I think I just felt a teeny glimmer of hope and excitement. Love to blog...it helps with my perspective.
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I'm grateful that support group meets tonight, I sure could use some. Of course what normal person would be excited about having their digestive system re-routed!
It's the changes I am looking forward to. So here I am, one month away from my re-birth. Hey, I think I just felt a teeny glimmer of hope and excitement. Love to blog...it helps with my perspective.
