kimjones120

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So happy that this is another week gone! There is not much to update about. Still the same 'ol stuff going on in my life work, work, and more work. I am still going back and forward with these same 5 lbs that seem to go nowhere but I have made up my mind to not get discouraged and to keep on doing what I am doing. I have made the decision to start lifting weights everyday no matter what. I've start to see some definition in my arms, legs, and abs. I am so hype about the weight lifting thing. I've always wanted to be very muscular and I am begining to see everything form. On the other hand I might need to loose these last 40lbs before I start bulking up...I don't know. I've been battling wiht food all week long. It seems like I just want some chips so bad that I can't function that's really scary to me. I ate a fish sandwich yesterday and a few fries (Mcdonalds) but I didn't really feel all that bad because I know that I exercise everyday and I make sure that I burn 1000+ calories. However I don't want to fall into the trap that I exercise and burn so many calories that I can eat anything and still have no consequences to suffer from making bad food choices. Although I don't overeat and I am very aware of the foods that I put in my body I don't want to get into the habit of making bad choices. I could have very well ordered a grilled chicken sandwich and been very satisfied. I will do better next time...Until then!

I am so happy that this week is over with. Even though this weekend is my weekend to work I will be in and out of here like nobody's business. I am having one of those days where just about everybody gets on my nerves. It's almost like the sound of some people's voice just makes my mufu'n blood boil. I am the type of person that loves to see people acheive their goals whatever they are. Why can't people be happy for what I acheive? Tricks mean muggin' on a sistah for no reason, saying good morning with attitudes...I just stop speaking and be about my own business. I normally don't give a fu--you  know the rest--about what people say or think about me, but today I just don't feel like it. I got enough going on in my personal life to deal with that all other things are so trivial to me. Ok, let me get back on track here because I was just all over the place a minute ago. Antyways, I did good this morning with my exercises...I burned 800 calories on the elliptical and 200 calories on the stair stepper. I made this bomb a** CD to workout to and I was sweating like a runaway slave when I was finished. I made sure that the last song was something that could just get me hype...the song was Bombs Over Bagdad by Outkast (bob yo head ragtop--bob yo head ragtop) man that had me pumpin' I was hurting but I kept on>>I see what the bodybuilders mean now when they say workout to failure cause I wanted to stop but I kept going until I burned those 200 calories. See that's what people need to do...stop hating and get into peoples head to see what motivates them. If I see someone that I think has a nice shape (man or woman) or anything for that matter that I desire, I talk to them to see where they are coming from, see what not only motivates them but what helps them to continue to do what they do. Some people are so simple. Ok for real let me get off my little soap box...I'm done venting. I really need to find me some true friends to talk to because I don't really like venting on this blog thing. Till next time!

I procrastinate so much. I knew when I wrote that I would keep my profile updated that I was not going to be able to do it. I'm on this website every single day dipping and reading everybody's business and can't keep up with my own! Antyways, I was officially 1 year post op on July 27th 2007! Here are the stats...Started out May 05 @ 350lbs, lost down to 347lbs before I started 6 month supervised diet in Oct 05. The day of my surgery I weighed in @ 330lbs wearing a size 30W pants, 48DDD bra, and at least a 4XL top, size 14 panties, size 9W shoes.....need I say more! Today I am 205lbs. I focus mainly on body measurements so here they are------------36-32-45 (damn those hips). My bra size is 34-36DD, pants size is 14, I can wear large and some medium tops, my shoe size is 7 1/2 (some 8), panties size 8. For those who can't believe yes you can be over 200lbs and wear a 14, guess it depends on your body type. Alot of people are telling me that I am at a good size and I don't need to lose anymore weight but I beg to differ. It seems like no one understands when they have never been 350+ pounds. I was explaining to one of my associates the other day that there is not a switch that I can hit to stop the weight or the inches from coming off. I still want to loose about 40 more pounds. I really want my hips to go down to like a 40 or 38, have to work hard on that though because hips, thighs, and a** runs in the family. Aujah (my daughter) started her first day in high school a week ago. I have to stay prayed up when she is concerned because I see alot of me in her like when I was her age. My mom told me when I was cuttin' up when I was a teenager that if I have a girl she was going to give me a run for my money...and she was not lyin'. As for other things in my life all is well as can be expected. I am still going through alot of personal issuse that I don't want to blog but I am taking and dealing with everything one day @ a time. That's it for now!

Everything is going as well as can be expected these days. I have been dealing with a lot of personal issuses that has had me depressed for the past several weeks. Fortunately I haven't turned to food as a comfort in helping me deal with these issues. I have a great fear that has been lurking with me since I had this surgery. The fear is weight gain. I have been reading the WLS graduate borard alot lately and that's all that I see there is people with the same question..." how do I get back on track?" It scares me everytime I read on that board, but it also helps me to keep things on the right track for myself. I've lost over 100lbs since surgery and to think that could gain back a pound after 2 or 3 years scares me senseless. I just wonder about those that gain after so long...do they just go back to their old habits, do they start off thinking they can have a little and control it, is it all grazing throughout the day, did the surgery fail them or did they fail the surgery. I pray to God alot about this, I would be devestated to have lost and gain back. Anyway just something I just wanted to get off of my chest. However I will continue to read the boards and the post about those and their weight gain and take mental notes on what not to do, like graze, no soft drinks  (not even diet), no sugar, no simple carbs, ect. My motto is Mind over Body, it has helped me get out of a lot of sticky situations... not just with food!