LawyerGirl
Two Months Out...Eyes Wide Open
Apr 10, 2010
OK, so wow. Two months out and down 53 pounds! This is an amazing place to be. I, like a lot of other post RNYers had a little bit of "buyer's remorse" in the beginning. And no, I'm not scared to admit it. I had never had any type of surgery before (other than getting my wisdom teeth out) and I just really did not know what to expect pain wise. And then, two weeks after my surgery, just when I thought things were getting better, I had a horrible experience with some tuna:-). But now, here I am. Blood pressure under control and lower back pain gone. I think when you're obese, but not completely immobile, you fool yourself into believing that your weight isn't "that bad." I mean, I still get up and go to work everyday, I can still take care of my personal hygiene, I don't have diabetes, and, in my case, I even went to water aerobics and line dancing classes once a week. But none of that changed the reality that my weight was ballooning out of control and killing me, slowly. For someone who exercises logic on a daily basis, my behavior and the situation I had created for myself made no sense. Just think about that for a moment...I may be obese and have a wide range of health and personal issues as a result of it, but at least I'm not diabetic. Does that even make sense? Of course not, but, the thing is, with an addiction, it never does. That's right. I said it. Addiction. That's what it is, plain and simple.So now, two months later, here's what I know. (Don't worry, I'm not going to say anything corny like..."Now I eat to live instead of living to eat"). I know that I didn't get to be 334 pounds just because I like food. I was using food to deal with a whole range of emotions. Stress, anger, heartache...you name it. I also now know that the tool is stopping me from eating mindlessly or unconsciously. I was actually sitting at my desk at work last week and was working on a very challenging case. I got to a point where I didn't know what to do, and found myself starting to think, "I'm '''hungry'''." Then, because of this nice small pouch and rerouting of intestines situation I have, and how cautious I've learned to be about putting anything in my body, I realized, I'm not actually hungry. I'm responding to the stress of this difficult issue. That was an amazing breakthrough. Sure, the fact that I can wear smaller clothes and fit into chairs more comfortably is wonderful, but it's nothing compared to the awakening I had in my office last week.
I'm thankful for this opportunity. For ankles that don't swell. For being able to walk long distances without my back hurting. For seatbelts that buckle without contorted body movements. For the love of family and friends. And for the knowledge that because of this surgery, I am slowly rejoining the true land of the living. Peace and Blessings Andrea
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About Me
Philadelphia, PA
Location
27.1
BMI
Surgery
02/08/2010
Surgery Date
Mar 01, 2008
Member Since
Before & After
rollover to see after photo
