Lisa_W
I have always been overweight. Ever since I was 6 years old, I can remember being "bigger" than the others. My nicknames at school were fatty and wideload. These carried with me clear through high school. I learned that the only way I could "beat" the jocks and thin girls at school was to use my brain. They couldn't compete with me there. However, I still longed to be looked at as attractive and someone others wanted to be with besides for my "smarts". After high school I met a guy who really saw me for who I was - even if I was 50 pounds overweight. I was so infatuated and insecure, I didn't think twice about marrying him - I was afraid that I would never have a guy attracted to me again! The 15 year marriage produced two beautiful kids, verbal and physical abuse and a mariad of diets and about 130 pounds gained! One day a girlfriend of mine who was heavy called me. I hadn't seen her in a while and when I did I saw she had lost 50 pounds on a pre-packaged food plan. I signed up right there and promptly lost 70 pounds, the 15 year husband and found a new man who I am totally in love with and have been for 10 years. The only problem is is I am now 45, have re-gained and lost my weight several times only to end up at 350 pounds. I am worried about heart attacks, diabetes, arthritis - and I have been on a CPAP machine for over two years. I don't make this decision for WLS lightly. Two years ago I went through all the pre-op tests and was all completed with the exception of acceptance from the insurance company. I was denied. I appealed and still was denied. So depressing. I was angry for a while because it seemed like my life was all about money and if I didn't have it, I would have to risk my life and stay this way. Eventually I did what most of us do and dieted some more. I lost 52 pounds, but the end of the road was sooo far away I ended up giving up. I am in need of losing 210 pounds. You just don't see statistics like that very often. So, I have chosen this path. I need firm guidance and a change that will help me break habits of 45 years. I have insurance now that will cover my surgery and am going through all of the tests currently. I am hoping to have surgery sometime between July and December this year. I knew 2007 was going to be my year!
