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Maybe it's because I'm special, but I don't get it.

 

Maybe it's because I'm special.  Or in pain.  Or just not understanding because maybe I am in a different head space.  I am voting that I again, am not normal.

I'm watching online conversations about "food addictions" and  "binge eating" after weight loss surgery and I am awfully confused.  

For example -- a post WLS patient describes herself as a binge-eater, going through the steps of sobering up or breaking this addiction. 

Eating disorders happen after weight loss surgery, I know it can be a serious complicating issue.  I have several online friends who DO have diagnosed eating disorders post weight loss surgery, and a few that are definitely suspect, and who don't know they suffer.  It happens, it's reality.  So be it.   

I do not discount her experience.

However, what she describes, doesn't sound so dire.  

It doesn't sound anything at all like what my friends have suffered at the hands of their eating disorders.  At all.  

Again, I realize symptoms differ from person to person, and can be entirely different for each person suffering.  Unless there are major factors that she's not discussing, I am concerned that the behavior she is trying "break-free" from is quite normal, well, very normal... within the realm of a weight loss surgery patient.   In fact, they sound quite normal for lots of people who might absent-mindedly "go-to" food as a coping mechanism.   But, all out ADDICTION?

But, my sense of normal is obviously off the charts, I drink 1.5 pots of coffee per day and break half of the "Rules Of The Pouch."  That probably makes me certifiably insane by some of your post WLS standards.  Lock me away.  Just allow me coffee and cheese.

Why do I care?   Because many of us are reading about these issues -- and wondering --  no, I know they're wondering, because I'm getting the emails --

"WAIT A MINUTE, I DO THAT.  I didn't know it was WRONG!  What, do I have an eating disorder too?  Do I need treatment?  OMG.  Somebody tell me if I am okay?"  

And, to be honest, this reminds me alot of that scary window salesman who pushed Overeaters Anonymous on myself and my husband when I mentioned that we had weight loss surgery -

"You must admit that you have no power over food."

YOU!  OUT OF MY HOUSE!  

We're doing alright, WHY THE HELL are you scaring the newly UNFAT?  SHOO!  GET. OUT. OF. MY. HOUSE.

Get your God out of my crackers!  I happen to ENJOY eating.   Just, in Very Small Amounts!  I'm not going to hide my crackers, don't TAKE THEM FROM ME.  You do not want to mess with a hypoglycemic's snacks.

Binge eating, as described by the Weight Control Network:

Most of us overeat from time to time, and some of us often feel we have eaten more than we should have. Eating a lot of food does not necessarily mean that you have binge eating disorder. Experts generally agree that most people with serious binge eating problems often eat an unusually large amount of food and feel their eating is out of control. 

People with binge eating disorder also may:

• Eat much more quickly than usual during binge episodes.
• Eat until they are uncomfortably full.
• Eat large amounts of food even when they are not really hungry.
• Eat alone because they are embarrassed about the amount of food they eat.
• Feel disgusted, depressed, or guilty after overeating.

It's pretty easy for anyone to slide into those categories, especially if we qualified for weight loss surgery.  You could probably qualify for many of these as a pre-op, and you didn't even think about it.  Many WLS patients were compulsive overeaters prior to surgery, and the surgery only partially helps.

I suppose the difference is -- post surgery -- DOING SO CAN CAUSE DISTRESS.  Over-eating can physically cause PAIN, discomfort, dumping, nausea or any number of things.  That's a big impetus for many post ops to quit overeating to begin with -- to avoid the pain.  They aren't thinking about the emotional causes, triggers, to overeating, they just don't want to throw up.

We're not really thinking about being POWERLESS, we are thinking, "Holy shit, I don't want to break my pouch!"

I knew going in to roux en y surgery that overeating or eating the inappropriate foods would cause a physical reaction, and would put me in time out for being "bad."  That was part of my reasoning for choosing roux en y surgery, I wanted to know that I would PAY DEARLY for messing with Ben + Jerry.  

And, I do.  Pay Dearly.  Not, mess around with Ben + Jerry.  I have other vices.  Hello, caffeine!  But, on that thread, do I think I require 12 Steps Away From Coffee?  Maybe two.  One - STOP.  But, you know what TWO is?  MEDICATE.  There's always something else.  

I guess what I am trying to say is -- if we qualified for weight loss surgery, we sort of went in to this game with an eating problem, no?  It shouldn't come as a big surprise that later on --- "How did that stack of crackers disappear?"  Oh.  That was me.  Uh.  Sorry.  The crackers aren't holding Supreme Power! over me.  I'm stupid and I eat them.  I'm not saying YOU are, I am saying I AM.

We are aware that we have a problem when we go under the knife, that's why we're doing it, to "gain control," because we failed every other method.  (Or at least we pretended we did to get insurance coverage.)

But -- this?   Perhaps before weight loss surgery, but do you still do this now?

Compulsive Overeating/Binge Eating Disorder

1. Fear of not being able to control eating, and while eating, not being able to stop.
2. Isolation. Fear of eating around and with others.
3. Chronic dieting on a variety of popular diet plans.
4. Holding the belief that life will be better if they can lose weight.
5. Hiding food in strange places (closets, cabinets, suitcases, under the bed) to eat at a later time.
6. Vague or secretive eating patterns.
7. Self-defeating statements after food consumption.
8. Blames failure in social and professional community on weight.
9. Holding the belief that food is their only friend.
10. Frequently out of breath after relatively light activities.
11. Excessive sweating and shortness of breath.
12. High blood pressure and/or cholesterol.
13. Leg and joint pain.
14. Weight gain.
15. Decreased mobility due to weight gain.
16. Loss of sexual desire or promiscuous relations.
17. Mood swings. Depression. Fatigue.
18. Insomnia. Poor Sleeping Habits.

I am concerned that we're not allowing ourselves to be normal, normal former morbid-obese girls, though.   Cut yourself a little...slack here.  The function of most weight loss surgeries prevents you from creating too much caloric havoc -- you do have to work a little bit to break them.  (Want to learn how to gain weight with a gastric bypass?  I can teach you.  I'm totally writing an eBook.)

If we had surgery to "control" ourselves because we were out of control, and we then restrict our diets to a very limited intake to "control" ourselves, and then further "control" the situation by blowing up mostly normal post WLS food intake into sinful acts?  

We leave ourselves entirely out of control.  Nothing to eat, standing in front of the fridge recycling thoughts of what "I don't need."  Nothing like beating yourself up over a snack.  Is it worth it?

What is left to lose?   What are you going to do when you've villified all food and all food intake situations?  

If food is no longer an option -- you may very well find another -- "option."

Right.  It ain't knitting, honey.  (Well, for you it is.  But, you are weird.  <3)

Have you read Weighty Secrets?  Everybody done doin' something.  You just don't KNOW ABOUT IT.  

It's all too much.  

And, no, emailers, you don't appear to have an eating disorder, but if you do, so do I, and so do we all.  Let's book a whole wing someplace.  Wait, that sounds, appealing... actually.  

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The Obesity Action Coalition deserves our support.

I HAVE QUALIFIED FOR THE GRAND PRIZE!  

If I WIN, I am REGIFTING THE GRAND PRIZE TO ONE OF YOU.  We can so do this.

Leave a comment AT THIS POST to let me know you're all set.  

Thank you all.  And, feel free to share.

Sugar = Held at Gunpoint. What would YOU choose?

If you see a certain company selling CLICK and eatingdrinking their words in a few months?  Remember all of this drama.

"After reading a whole slew of posts on Facebook a few days ago, I had an epiphany that maybe the way that I eat is not how the majority of people eat once they have had bariatric surgery.

If some one burst into in my office, put a gun to my head and made me eat a Snickers bar, the candy would upset me as much as the gunman."

A ten year post operative roux en y gastric bypass patient, so fears The Snickers Bar (or sugar?) that she equates it to being HELD AT GUNPOINT to make a choice? 

I do not discount your (you, the reader) choices to avoid simple sugars as you may be a very early post op, and likely in fear of dumping, or regaining weight.   Although, hypothetically, if you were approached with a gun and a Snickers?  Right. 

Bitch, you'd be stuffing the candy bar in your mouth and peeing your pants.  So would I.  I'd gladly dump, and not die. 

That's a SICK and absurd comparsion.

You must understand something if you're not already there yet:  the fear and loathing of carbohydrates passes very quickly for most individuals after a gastric bypass surgery.  Once you learn your personal tolerance and limitations, you tend to stick to them.  As you lose the excess weight, you find that there are rules, however you're not chained to anything.  You find what works for you, and stick with it in order to be as successful as possible. 

To equate a single candy bar (or CLICK) to the anxiety of being HELD AT GUNPOINT is ludricrous. 

I promise you this person has had her share of chocolate of  Other Carbohydrates.   

There is a whole category of other carbohydrates, many of which, gastric bypass patients are NOT suggested to have in their daily calorie allotment, but, some people choose to use their calories for liquid carbohydrates in such forms.  Just saying.  (IS THAT VAGUE ENOUGH?) 

Oh, wait, I think she mentions something about....

"I have heard some folks use it as a base for making chocolate martini's too. Its all about who we answer to and ultimately we live the consequences of our actions."

Susan, who do YOU answer to? 

I personally, don't make "martini's," - frankly - it was done twice for photography and product promotion.

I've gotten enough backlash for that to fill a blog.  Which I have.  Thanks.

But, your personal blog speaks to alcohol as a much more frequent habit. 

You spoke of a friend vomiting into her cup -- because "she didn't know when to stop" -- however -- that friend was on your tab.  That's friendship. 

PSA - Here's my post on alcohol and the gastric bypass patient.

But, you will choose to pick on a protein drink that contains seven grams of FRUCTOSE -

The following is a post from Before and After today, the back story is that there's the drama about CLICK, because too many people like it.  Someone had asked about it on their message board  (Basically, "Why do so many WLS people use it?"  Because we like it.  I'm sorry about that.)

BE -

"After reading a whole slew of posts on Facebook a few days ago, I had an epiphany that maybe the way that I eat is not how the majority of people eat once they have had bariatric surgery. If some one burst into in my office, put a gun to my head and made me eat a Snickers bar, the candy would upset me as much as the gunman. Its just the way I have always felt about my surgical choice. I had my stomach cut in half and my intestines rerouted and I remember that every single day - its serious stuff. Before surgery I willingly chose very high fat, high sugar, high calorie foods but after surgical intervention I work hard to be happy with my post op choices.

I like myself and I love my life. It has been a long road to get here but that has been my Journey. My Journey is my Life.  (PS. Link these words to the Journey vitamins, Suz.)

All of us who Moderate and Administrate this very large message board community of nearly 30,000 people over these last five years have had very unique Journeys. (Here, Too. Are those Capitalized Verbs products, too?)

While we have a close bond, we have little in common other than this surgery. We offer many different views, likes, dislikes, personal stories, and pre-operative medical situations. Many of us suffer from after effects of our surgery which we are open about as well. We are kind and compassionate - one or two of us like to dance and some of us are funny as all get out - but all of us are pro's at reaching out a hand to those who are swimming furiously to keep their heads above water.

None of us believe that this is easy. We also understand that this is not automatic for many of you. I don't believe that any of us ride a high horse nor do we give the impression that we think you are weak because you struggle. We struggle too and some of us are not at goal weight - we get it! We respect each of you, as we understand the courage it takes to have bariatric surgery. 

While some have a compulsion to eat foods with sugar, fast foods, junk foods, the very foods responsible for our Morbid Obesity, no one casts aspersions based on your having slid off the road. Our chief goal is to find you, help you out of the bushes, clean you off, give you a hug and get you a decent home cooked meal. We encourage you to open up and allow us to help you. There is no judgment, no bashing, no laughing at anyone, no making fun at anyone's expense, and we don't use rude language - it is not allowed, nor would we dream of such. So while we obviously do not encourage folks to skip along eating foods that do not further our goals for weight loss and health, we don't belittle you for it either.  (I thought that's what BE stood for?  BELITTLE?)

Welcome to 2011 - this is the place to BE. If you eat cake - and need support, we will definitely give you a hug and help you. (No, that's bullshit. Not everyone.  I was tossed out in my first post in 2008.)

If you want to start off on the right foot - we are here to show you the path. If you have been off the path and have regained ten pounds or one hundred pounds - we are here to help you. Welcome to the best place for bariatric post ops on the Planet"

Then...

"I guess it would be easier at this point to just sell the stuff! Maybe I should have been selling it for all these years rather than having to keep explaining that it has too much sugar. Lol.  (If you DO come around and start selling it, PLEASE EXPLAIN IN ADVANCE how you're going to EXPLAIN your "change of heart.")

While I get that others really like this stuff and that is fine as we all have different tastes - we are not really talking about 7 grams of sugar. People have totally missed the point that Click uses a different standard for scoop size.

Since most protein drinks use a 25 to 30g of protein per serving standard - in all fairness,CLICK has 14 grams of sugar in a serving size providing 30 grams of protein. We dont drink 15g proteins shakes, most of us drink 25 to 30 gram protein shakes or drinks.  (Who's "we?")

If folks want to use a protein shake that has14g of sugar to provide 30 grams of protein - have at it. Post op life is all about choices. I have heard some folks use it as a base for making chocolate martini's too. Its all about who we answer to and ultimately we live the consequences of our actions. (See above, re: answering to God.)

_______________ have 14 grams of sugar that is from fruit puree used as a flavoring, but it has 32 grams of protein so its easier to justify. (You make up reasons to justify the products you sell?  This product makes ME dump like a TRUCK.  I LOVE IT.  L-O-V-E IT.  Do you tell customers that it can make them sick?) We worked with the makers of _______ and the new version WILL have 9 grams of sugar per bottle as most folks want less sugar these days.

___ said it well 'the best protein drink is the one you use', (Which, is... CLICK.) but I just wish this one either had a little more protein or a little less sugar - that's all - as very few people love coffee more than I do, and I really wanted to love Click. (Sure, you did.)

 My head, exploded.  Did you see the glitter? 

I commited Bariatric Suicide for breakfast. I am writing this from my Bariatric Afterlife Zombielife.  Who's going to sponsor my funeral?  (Eww, Beth, this is gross!  Yeah, well, so was that post.)

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It appears that nobody got naked, so the video actually got posted!  Win!  

I don't see your pretty face in here.  Did you bribe someone to get it off the memory card before we left Texas?  Huh?  HUH?  I know you did.  :P  Considering my bird made the cut, I know your purdy mug should be there.  You must have flashed.

These booths are so fun, doncha wish you had one at your PROM and your WEDDING?  I mean, seriously -- can you imagine the photos you'd be gifted with?  SO MUCH FUN, so funny.  

I'm looking forward to OH's 2011 Events.

PS.  Count the Bariatric Bad Girls, win a prize?  LOL.

   ~Anaïs Nin

I have a suggestion for this year:   No resolutions.  No silly diets.  No "pouch tests" on Monday after the first of the New Year.  Let's start 2011 without the usual drama of body-hate, loathing and drama.  

Keep reading for the GIVEAWAY!

New playground taunts -"Your mom has a Lap-Band.  So?  YOUR MOM HAS A BYPASS!"

Under a new proposal to the FDA, Allergan, the makers of the Lap-Band, requested that the weight guidelines for gastric banding surgery be lowered.

New York Times -

"To win approval of the lower threshold, Allergan sponsored a study in which 149 of these less obese people had the band implanted. About 80 percent of the participants achieved the goal of losing at least 30 percent of their excess weight, meaning the amount by which they were overweight, after one year. About 70 percent of patients experienced a side effect, like vomiting or pain. The F.D.A. indicated on Wednesday that it had questions about how meaningful the weight loss was and whether the results of the study would be applicable to people other than the white women who made up a large portion of the participants.

Some doctors are dropping the band, in part because some older studies suggest that up to a third of patients eventually have the band removed because of side effects or ineffective weight loss. While about one in 1,000 patients die within 30 days of surgery, a survey of members of the bariatric surgery society suggested that deaths occurring later are under-reported.

But, this is a big deal!

New York Times -

"Under the proposed lower threshold, that person could weigh 30 pounds less, or 186 pounds." 

This means my mom can have weight loss surgery, sounds like a put down doesn't it? 

"Yeah, WELL, YOUR MOM HAD WEIGHT LOSS SURGERY." 

In this case, I ALREADY did, so go ahead and SAY IT.  As did my mother in law.  And, now my mother can, too! (This is where my own mother threatens my life and never reads my blog again, and returns the kid's Christmas gifts.)

But, it makes a point.  My mother. 

The woman would QUALIFY FOR WEIGHT LOSS SURGERY.   This woman, who was stick-thin as a young adult, and a solid average 14/16 for most of her middle age, now a few pounds heavier thanks to life (woooohotflashesFTW) and half-caff afternoon 2% Peppermint Mochas?  Eek!

Perhaps, if she were also dealing with a severe co-morbidity like Type II Diabetes AT her BMI, it might seem more attractive to consider a surgical option to help put the 'betes in remission.  But, she isn't.

Lap-Band Medical Considerations -

• You are at least 18 years old.
• You have been overweight for more than 5 years.
• Your serious weight loss attempts have had only short-term success.
• You are not currently suffering from any other disease that may have caused your excess weight.
• You are prepared to make major changes in your eating habits and lifestyle.
• You do not drink alcohol in excess.
• You are not currently pregnant. (Note: If you become pregnant after having this procedure, the band can be adjusted for the duration of your pregnancy.)
• Health Risks Explorer at Lap-Band Site

There are millions of Americans at an elevated BMI that this lowered threshold would encompass. 

Millions of I'm-almost-morbidly-obese individuals getting in line for gastric band surgery.  (Honest reaction:  I WOULD TOO.)

The ASMBS says that this over-load isn't likely -

Even if Allergan’s application is approved, perhaps a small fraction of the new candidates are likely to opt for surgery because many people avoid operations. “I don’t think it’s enough to overwhelm the health care system,” said Dr. Bruce Wolfe, president of American Society for Metabolic and Bariatric Surgery, whose executive council unanimously endorsed Allergan’s proposal.

“That’s not happening with the people who are heavier and need it even more.”

The society says that 220,000 bariatric surgeries of all kinds were performed in the United States last year. That is more than twice as many as in 2003, but represents a small fraction of the potential pool.

Still, some less obese patients do want the surgery. Some online discussion boards tell of people who purposely gained weight to qualify, and some messages give advice to others on wearing hidden weights.

Look in your own household or extended family. 

• Who would qualify based on BMI under the lowered standards?

For you - a chart of fun -

Basically, my whole extended family would qualify, if this goes through!  Go us!

I will have content forever.  And ever. (Tongue-in-cheek - You do realize that was my aim when I started this blog.  I had one post op to write about.  Me.  I know have FOUR in the immediate family.  2004, 2004, 2006, 2007.  Now everybody could join us.)  Every-body.  Including, at least 50% of my own children in a few years.  "Super."

Oh, stop, BE REALISTIC.  My kids, born to TWO SUPER MORBIDLY OBESE PARENTS, with SUPER MORBIDLY OBESE GRANDPARENTS ON BOTH SIDES?  "WE WIN." 

We WILL have at least one child with a weight loss surgery procedure in the future.  I guarantee it.  The BMI charts told us this at 18 MONTHS old.  Two of my children are already taller and heavier than I am now, at ages 11 and 13.

NYT -

Doctors have already started to operate on extremely heavy teenagers, not just adults. And some experts are recasting weight-loss procedures, known as bariatric surgery, as metabolic surgery, saying that it might be justified to treat diabetes, even in people who are barely obese or not obese.

I'd like to start with my father and a duodenal switch first, however.  No band.  He could rock a DS, he's already taking his vitamins.  He is vehemently shaking his head "N-O," but he doesn't know about the DS.  He only knows that Beth Has A Twitch Problem that she didn't have before a gastric bypass, even if she is 170 pounds lighter, and he too, could be.  But, I digress.

WIN - NIH Image

What say YOU?

-Beth, who is 165 lbs and 5 ft 3-4 inches this morning, considering gaining up to 190something to get a Lap Band to get restriction of her intake for the long term.  Just saying.

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