prechrgrl
HAPPY DANCE
Dec 06, 2006
Hello again, we are signed off on and ready for surgery. I have all my prescriptions and instructions. The best part is I didn't gain any weight and DON'T have to go on a liquid diet until the day before surgery. Thank you Lord for that. My goal weight is 135. I can't hardly believe I will that small come summer. My surgeon is great. She spent a lot of time with DH and me today, went over everything again and again and asnwered any questions. Nothing to do now but wait and praise the LORD.
Todayb is preo-op appointment FINALLY
Dec 05, 2006
Well, I'm getting ready for my pre-op appointment. 5 days till my surgery. Here are my before bad, bad pixs posted in photos and measurments below. This is real bad to me. I have never looked like this. I am so excited about having this surgery and a second chance at health. So looking forward to a skinny summer...I'll post more after the preo-op today. Blessings and Peace.
neck 16 1/2
arms R 15 1/2, L 15
Boobs 49
waist 50 1/2
hips 55
thighs R 26, L 26 3/4
Praise God His Mercy Endures Forever
Dec 02, 2006
Hello, I just wanted to say God is so good. And he knows what he is doing. I have been so hard on myself with deciding to do this surgery. Really struggling in my mind with not being able to lose this weight on my own. But with the help of some Godly people I now understand that it is truly a tool and gift from God. I still have to do the work, diet and exercise. Do my part, like working out my own salvation everyday, well working out my body too. God is good. I am going to stop the devil right now. He is not going to steal my peace or my tool. 10 more days to go! Thank you Jesus.
Poem
Nov 28, 2006
I found this poem on another profile, it is so beautiful that I wanted to post it here. It sums up so much for me. I can stand the waiting.
Out of Hell: Reflections on Losing 150 Pounds
So many nights, I whimpered and cried,
Thought that my prayers had all been denied.
Stuffing my feelings, ashamed of my plight,
Trying to stop, with all of my might.
Morning would come, and that is when,
The whole vicious cycle would start once again.
Tears would be streaming, I felt like a cow,
I wanted to stop, but I didn't know how.
Walking a block, and feeling such pain,
That I went right back home to start eating again.
" Your face is so pretty! Start using your head!"
"Just eat smaller portions , " my family said.
" Put down the fork! Push back from the table!"
That's what my friends said...But I wasn't able.
" Willpower's the secret!
We'll help you get through it!"
" TRY HARDER, " they urged...But I couldn't do it.
I tried every diet to get back on track,
I'd lose weight and then just gain twice as much back!
Every morning I'd pray, " God let me be good..
" Then I'd fail once again...and no one understood.
Each new day would bring another attempt,
Each evening would bring still more self-contempt.
Filled with self-loathing, such awful remorse,
Simply unable to get back on course.
Overwhelmed with this state of awful depression,
Giving in to this dark, paralyzing obsession.
I thought to myself, " You'll always be fat..
Accept it, move on! Learn to live with that fact!
"Questioning God and wondering why,
Positive that I was destined to die.
Yet something inside me was whispering, "No..
There MUST be a way.. It HAS to be so.
"I felt a new person was waiting inside me,
And it was their voice, I permitted to guide me.
I knew I could no longer go on this way,
Desperate and dying, bit by bit, day by day.
So I got on my knees, and prayed for relief,
Then God sent a miracle to lessen my grief.
A way to stop eating, so crazy I thought,
Went against everything I had been taught.
This was my last option, I felt like a jerk.
If this didn't do it, then NOTHING would work!
So I trusted the doctors, wholly and blindly,
And my God smiled down, completely and kindly.
An unorthodox treatment, but working so well,
To help lift me OUT of this ongoing hell.
A surgical wonder, that acts as a tool
To battle the fat, which has made life so cruel.
So as scared as I was, I knew I'd get through it...
Since I was so much more afraid not to do it.
And it went very smoothly, and I'm convinced of that.
That pain was less than the pain of this fat.
Nothing could hurt more than being this size,
While seeing the pity in everyone's eyes.
That part of my life is over and done,
But I'll never forget the place I came from.
I'll always be grateful, I'll always be driven
To bestow upon others the support I've been given.
The obsession has lifted, I'm whole and I'm free,
God and my surgeon gave my life back to me.
I've learned to eat slowly, I've learned how to chew
Enjoying my food, as normal folks do.
I eat when I'm hungry, I stop when I'm not,
Being fat, in this life, will not be my lot.
I eat not for sport, but just to survive,
My whole life is changing...I'm glad I'm alive!
I will reach the goal that I'm aiming toward,
I've truly been blessed...Thank You Lord.
The peace that I feel is calming and true,
And for those who still suffer...I wish it for you.
-Author Unknown
Out of Hell: Reflections on Losing 150 Pounds
So many nights, I whimpered and cried,
Thought that my prayers had all been denied.
Stuffing my feelings, ashamed of my plight,
Trying to stop, with all of my might.
Morning would come, and that is when,
The whole vicious cycle would start once again.
Tears would be streaming, I felt like a cow,
I wanted to stop, but I didn't know how.
Walking a block, and feeling such pain,
That I went right back home to start eating again.
" Your face is so pretty! Start using your head!"
"Just eat smaller portions , " my family said.
" Put down the fork! Push back from the table!"
That's what my friends said...But I wasn't able.
" Willpower's the secret!
We'll help you get through it!"
" TRY HARDER, " they urged...But I couldn't do it.
I tried every diet to get back on track,
I'd lose weight and then just gain twice as much back!
Every morning I'd pray, " God let me be good..
" Then I'd fail once again...and no one understood.
Each new day would bring another attempt,
Each evening would bring still more self-contempt.
Filled with self-loathing, such awful remorse,
Simply unable to get back on course.
Overwhelmed with this state of awful depression,
Giving in to this dark, paralyzing obsession.
I thought to myself, " You'll always be fat..
Accept it, move on! Learn to live with that fact!
"Questioning God and wondering why,
Positive that I was destined to die.
Yet something inside me was whispering, "No..
There MUST be a way.. It HAS to be so.
"I felt a new person was waiting inside me,
And it was their voice, I permitted to guide me.
I knew I could no longer go on this way,
Desperate and dying, bit by bit, day by day.
So I got on my knees, and prayed for relief,
Then God sent a miracle to lessen my grief.
A way to stop eating, so crazy I thought,
Went against everything I had been taught.
This was my last option, I felt like a jerk.
If this didn't do it, then NOTHING would work!
So I trusted the doctors, wholly and blindly,
And my God smiled down, completely and kindly.
An unorthodox treatment, but working so well,
To help lift me OUT of this ongoing hell.
A surgical wonder, that acts as a tool
To battle the fat, which has made life so cruel.
So as scared as I was, I knew I'd get through it...
Since I was so much more afraid not to do it.
And it went very smoothly, and I'm convinced of that.
That pain was less than the pain of this fat.
Nothing could hurt more than being this size,
While seeing the pity in everyone's eyes.
That part of my life is over and done,
But I'll never forget the place I came from.
I'll always be grateful, I'll always be driven
To bestow upon others the support I've been given.
The obsession has lifted, I'm whole and I'm free,
God and my surgeon gave my life back to me.
I've learned to eat slowly, I've learned how to chew
Enjoying my food, as normal folks do.
I eat when I'm hungry, I stop when I'm not,
Being fat, in this life, will not be my lot.
I eat not for sport, but just to survive,
My whole life is changing...I'm glad I'm alive!
I will reach the goal that I'm aiming toward,
I've truly been blessed...Thank You Lord.
The peace that I feel is calming and true,
And for those who still suffer...I wish it for you.
-Author Unknown
What a Turkey Day we had
Nov 26, 2006
4 days in Chicago with the grandkids at the in laws!!!We had a wonderful time with my grandkids, Tryson and Sydnee, they got to see their cousins and play the whole time. All that energy! I can't wait to have half the energy those kids have. We enjoyed the food, food and more food. I really fell off the wagon for my pre-op diet and I am sure if I lost any weight I gained every bit plus some back. Oh well. Looking forward to surgery 16 days to go. My pre-op appoint got changed to 12/6. They must really be sure we won't need anything else before surgery. I better call tomorrow and make sure everything is in order. Well I think I'll give my self a birthday party next week so I can have some chocolate cake one last time. Signing off... Looking forward to getting in my own bed...
Pray without Ceasing
Nov 20, 2006
Hello,
I've been in prayer today. Making sure I am in the Lord's will for my life and that I am doing the right thing. I can honestly say I have peace. It amases me how all we have to do is cry out TO the Lord and he hears our prayers and ANSWERS THEM!!! Do you know you can hear God speak? So many people beleive in God but do not seek him for direction. If they do pray it is so many times one way and they never hear God speak back. Why? Maybe because we don't believe God talks to us anymore sense we have the BIBLE, or we don't listen to strange voices in our head. But the voice is not in your head. It's in your heart and yes God does speak to us through his WORD the bible, but if you have hears to hear, he also speaks to you in your spirit. That still small voice within that we so many times discount as being our own thoughts is a lot of times GOD. See the bible says that HIS sheep know his voice... hummm so if we beleive the bible as being from God, we can hear him speak. I say all that, to say this. God is speaking IF we will listen. Shut up and listen...He has promised to hear us and answer us when we cry out to him. What is prayer? Don't it go both ways! It's communication. It takes 2...HELLO... So after we pray sit back and listen, meditate on the things God says. He will answer. Those are my words of wisdoM today for me. I hope as I continue to journal you will be blessed to. PRAISE THE LORD IN ALL THINGS.
I've been in prayer today. Making sure I am in the Lord's will for my life and that I am doing the right thing. I can honestly say I have peace. It amases me how all we have to do is cry out TO the Lord and he hears our prayers and ANSWERS THEM!!! Do you know you can hear God speak? So many people beleive in God but do not seek him for direction. If they do pray it is so many times one way and they never hear God speak back. Why? Maybe because we don't believe God talks to us anymore sense we have the BIBLE, or we don't listen to strange voices in our head. But the voice is not in your head. It's in your heart and yes God does speak to us through his WORD the bible, but if you have hears to hear, he also speaks to you in your spirit. That still small voice within that we so many times discount as being our own thoughts is a lot of times GOD. See the bible says that HIS sheep know his voice... hummm so if we beleive the bible as being from God, we can hear him speak. I say all that, to say this. God is speaking IF we will listen. Shut up and listen...He has promised to hear us and answer us when we cry out to him. What is prayer? Don't it go both ways! It's communication. It takes 2...HELLO... So after we pray sit back and listen, meditate on the things God says. He will answer. Those are my words of wisdoM today for me. I hope as I continue to journal you will be blessed to. PRAISE THE LORD IN ALL THINGS.
What I want
Nov 19, 2006
1. I want to walk up steps without pain
2. I want to Be able to tie my shoes
3. I want to be able to breath
4. I want to control food not let it control me
5. I want to be a living testimony of success
6. I want to keep up with my skinny butt husband
7. I want to run with my grandkids
8. I want to run a 5k and maybe a marathon
9. I want to be healthy
10. I want to live
Happy Feet
Nov 18, 2006
What a cute movie. We just got back from seeing Happy Feet with my 8 yo grandson Tryston. He loved it and is sure a blessing to me. We also went to a holiday parade today with his sister and Dad (my oldest). Mom was in the parade, she is a cheerleader coach. So we had a nice day. When Tryston seen the marching bands he said he wants to take drum lesson. Oh boy, his mom and dad are not going to like me but if he wants to be a drummer mamaw will get his lessons. Music is something you can always take with you your whole life, unlike sports where when you get old or hurt your done. So I will encourage him in music if he reallys wants lessons. Good Christmas present if you ask me. I want to get a pix posted on here of them, maybe I can do that tomorrow. We are headed to Chicago for Thanksgiving. My DH is from there and wants to go home for a visit. I have'nt told them about the surgery yet. They know a lot of people that have had it and I afraid my decision won't be accepted well or understood. His family has always been supportive so maybe I am wrong but I am gonna let DH tell them and take any heat for me if it comes LOL... I can't wait for my pre-op Dr. visit. I so hope I don't have to do the pre-op liquid diet that I have seen so many post about. I have been cheating on my pre-op diet as is and if they switch me to liquids I'll just cry. I'm trying to get in all m,y favorite foods before the surgery...humm don't know if 24 days is enough time for that LOL.. Well I'm rambling so more later. Oh one more thing, don't forget to PRAISE THE LORD FOR HIS GOODNESS!!!!
PEACE OUT!
PEACE OUT!
Hello
Nov 16, 2006
Well I started Christmas shopping today. I better not list anything I got incase some nosey kids read this LOL. Also started getting some things ready for WLS, buying some soups and liquids. Fun Fun... Not much going on today. I am counting down the days now. I thank God for his favor and how the doors just opened. There was no trouble or problems going through the approval process. I just can't wait to be a LOSER!
I GOTTA DATE
Nov 15, 2006
WOOOWHOOO, THE BIG DAY IS 12/12. TWO DAYS BEFORE MY BIRTHDAY. I CAN'T WAIT. MY PRE-OP APPOINTMENT IS 11/30. SO MUCH TO DO. I BETTER GET STARTED ON THAT CHRISTMAS SHOPPING. I WANT TO HAVE EVERYTHING DONE SO I CAN KICK BACK AND ENJOY THE HOLIDAYS WITH MY NEW POUCHIE.
MORE LATER... BYE
MORE LATER... BYE
