Week 7

Jul 13, 2010

 So this week was sort of a bummer:  I lost only 0.8lbs.  That number is excruciatingly low.   I ate probably high-sodium dinner last night.  So, I'll take it.  However, if I don't see a good loss next week, I will change things immediately.

Week 7 was pretty unremarkable.  I'm happy about that!  On Thursday I walked about 2 1/2 miles.  I also had a lot of restriction on Thursday--to where it felt like I couldn't even drink water very well.  I've noticed that my restriction changes.  Some days just a couple bites will put me over the edge, and other days I can eat a half of a sandwich (very slowly, of course).  I also went to support group again on Thursday.  It was very helpful.  We talked about the less politically correct reasons to have surgery.  You know, to look good, to feel good about ourselves.  I am always shocked that someone here on the board will immediately jump on you if you say you want to feel better about yourself or be more outgoing or feel more confident in making friends or whatever.  I can guarantee you the response you'll receive:  surgery won't change that.  Anyone who thinks weight does not play a central role in attracting males, or even female friends, is plain wrong.  Second, why is it wrong for me to want  to do something to feel better about myself?  And why should losing weight not make me feel better?  I am told that putting on make up will give me better confidence, or dressing business-like.  How is losing weight to feel confident any different than these old tips?  And, finally, just because I want to get better does not mean that I have horrible confidence now.  I am attracted to people who better themselves.  And I'm doing that through WLS and graduate school.  

Also, I realized I don't really have health reasons (yet) for losing the weight.  I have come to the realization that my asthma will not change with weightloss.  My general breathing (from walking or going upstairs) will be easier but my asthma is somewhat independent of my weight.  I realized just how healthy I was when everyone in the support group was talking about their health reasons for having surgery.  Almost everyone had diabetes, a good number had sleep apnea.  So I said that I had surgery so I wasn't hanging around waiting to see what I would end up with.  The psychologist (leader) asked if I had a family history of any of those.  No.  With the exception of cancer (and yes, weight does affect that), my family is pretty dang healthy--no heart problems, no diabetes, no stroke.

Wow, so I have totally been off on tangents.  Friday was my sister's birthday party.  We ordered salmon which was disgusting and sent back, and a caprese salad (tomato, basil, mozzarella, balsamic reduction) which we actually ate a few bites of.  Saturday was my niece's first birthday.  I'll admit I had half a cookie.  Last night was a wine tasting.  I haven't been to one in awhile and was nervous about how I'd do.  I did have that one drink a couple weeks ago but I've stayed away from alcohol for the most part.  This time I took advantage of the "dump bucket" and only needed a taste of each wine.  After that we went to dinner at an Asian restaurant.  I was not sure what to get but I got what I liked.  What a novel idea!  No, the food police here would probably not be happy.  But it was delicious and mostly protein although I did have a few bites of brown rice.

So that brings us up to today.  I want to do better this coming week so that my weight loss can be speedier, but I have to say that I am enjoying living.  This is how it's supposed to be.  Whatever works is what I'll do, and for me that is a meal plan that includes everything in moderation.  I ate very healthily before surgery.  It was the moderation part I had trouble with.  I'm happy to say that I now have a check on that.  I still get hungry a few hours in between meals.  Actually, I experienced more hunger when I ate few carbs.  But I feel that if I can battle with the hunger now, I should have little or no problem in the future.

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