I got approved... I should be happy, right?

Oct 28, 2012

So this Friday, I was working and I got a call from the surgeon I have been working with here in Jacksonville.  I had my doubts that I wanted to go through with everything because of some extra tests I felt like I was being required to take but wasn't sure why.  I was waiting to hear back from one of the patient advocates about the tests but this call was from someone in my surgeon's office. They wanted to schedule my next appointment to talk about the tests. Fine, that's not a problem.  Appointment is on November 8th. Well, then not even an hour later I get a call back from my patient advocate. They submitted the paperwork to my insurance and I was APPROVED! I didn't even know that they were going to submit the stuff until after i talked with the doctor.  So I was gobsmacked to say the least. I was so excited and called my husband and then my mom and told a few of my close friends.  I could barely concetrate the rest of the day on my work (which wasn't good because I had a big meeting that afternoon and it didn't go that well).

Anyway, this weekend has been two days of up and down emotions.  I am so excited and happy one moment, scared to death the next and then sad and confused.  I am worried about so many things. Worried about the money and bills that will come from this surgery and all the things associated with it.  I'm worried about my family not being able to give me the support I need and my husband not coming through to really help my in the way I need. I'm worried about not being able to lose all the weight that I want and gaining it back even after this surgery.  There are just so many concerns right now.

This should be a super happy time for me right now but with work and my husband and stepkids and stress, I am not letting myself fully enjoy it.  Ugh, Sunday nights always get me down. Especially when I have work issues waiting on me and my husband is pouting. :-(

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