kwinkleman
Tomorrow is a NEW day!!!
Oct 13, 2011
It simply has to be....because when you hit rock bottom there is truly no where to go but up right!?!?!?!?!? I am completly frustrated with myself today. Today is my 2 year anniversary at my job so they ordered in lunch. 1/2 salad and 1/2 sandwiches from Panera. I had planned on having soup today for lunch. But when the salads got here I had probably 1/4 of my coworkers salad. Then about an hour later I decided to eat another 1/2 a salad (they were portioned out in 1/2 size servings). Then about 2 hours later I ate the roast beef and cheddar cheese off the sandwich and threw away all the bread. Might not sound like much....but it really is considering I shouldn't be eating like that. While the thought of stretching my pouch is SO very real I truly think I have a food addiction. If it is there I want to eat it. I sit at my desk, and the afternoons are even worse, and I think about food. It is crazy. Maybe when I finally get health insurance I will do see a therapist because this is clearly an addiction.I really want to work on getting this food thing under control. With the intense bloating that I have had going on, over eating is CLEARLY not going to be a help. I would really like to remove meat products from my diet all together. But that is going to take willpower. Just like turning down the 1/2 salad, or simply not eating the roast beef and cheese off the sandwich takes willpower which I clearly do not have. My stomach has literally been upset all day long. So there is no real reason for me eating as much as I did. So tomorrow IS a new day. And if I can't promise anyone else anything I am going to promise myself that I WILL NOT overeat and I am going to literally watch everything I eat and write down what causes the bloating and what doesn't. Today....everything has caused it. From the egg I had for breakfast, to the cottage cheese snack, to the lettuce, to the roast beef. I emailed my NUT so hopefully she will get back with me. I also called the surgeon....but they NEVER get back with me so I don't see getting a call back from them.
Tomorrow I am going to try something a little different. Super small portions and tons of water. From my reading water is suppose to help with bloating. I also read that bloating can be a sign of dumping....but is it possible to dump from something I ate last week and was fine? I have been eating cottage cheese since the very beginning and never had an issue. I haven't ever had an issue with hot tea either but today even that caused my tummy to stick out a little further. I do that pregnancy wobble when I try to walk it is that uncomfortable.
I promise myself right now TODAY 10/13/2011 at 4:41PM (it should be 5:30 by the way) that I WILL NOT allow myself to feel this way for even one more second. If it IS because I am eating the wrong things or too much that IS something I have complete control over so there is NO excuse to be miserable. Going to take a long walk tonight, and eat very light if I eat anything at all. And tomorrow I will start over!!!! Can't break a promise to myself right!!! Why would anyone else keep their word to me if I can't even keep my word to myself!!
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About Me
FL
Location
29.0
BMI
Surgery
11/29/2010
Surgery Date
Oct 01, 2010
Member Since
