Wake 'em up and let 'em know she is coming boys!

Mar 17, 2012

 Some stories just need a place to be told.

I saw the text come in and knew right away what was wrong.  Heidi never texts unless it's important.  This was particularly foreboding.  "Call me ASAP."  I figured it was about the wedding we were having in less than two weeks.  Sometimes you just get sick of all the planning and doing and trying on that you just want to cut loose.  Well, it was going to be St. Patricks Day on Saturday and we were hard pressed to think of a better excuse to fire up the grill and have friends over for a bon fire.  But I knew somehow.  This was not going to be one of those calls.

I know it sounds corny, but my mind actually did do a flash back.  I was 19 again and meeting one of my best friend's new roommates.  One in particular stood out to me as someone who was just a down to earth guy and fun person to hang out with.  His name was Joe.  From the moment we were introduced, it was like we were joined at the hip.  He was like a long lost brother and I can tell you that most of the best times in my life have been with or celebrated by this man.  I remember meeting his wife and thinking that she would be the one to keep his rotten ass out of the jail I was sure our wild ways would put us in one day!  I met his mom and thought, well that explains things!  lol.  Connie was one of a kind.  She was so opposite my prim and proper mother, but just as loving.  She rode harleys, smoked like a chimney and drank beer like it was water.  But she would be quick to tell you that she doesn't drink whiskey and hadn't since 1981.  She worked a lot because she was on her own with her children.  Joe was her baby and he absolutely adored her.  I held his children when they were first born right there in the hospital.  He came and held mine when they were born.  Joe and Heidi dropped everything and ran anytime I got into trouble.  (which was way too often actually)  We may not be blood, but we are brother and sister through and through.  

Joe started taking care of his mom when his step dad passed away.  He bought her a house and set her up in it.  He made sure she had whatever she needed.  She continued to work and support herself, but Joe was there for the fix-it jobs, the car repairs, whatever.  He did it gladly.  He loved her so much.  

in 2010, my dad became very ill with end stage kidney disease.  His whole family got tested.  The only one that match had diabetes.  He was put on a donor list but we were not given much hope that one would come in time.  The doctor told us in September to enjoy the holidays this year and make the most of them.  Like I do when all my hurts become too much to handle alone, I turned to Joe and Heidi and their island of strength and support.  Heidi did me one better.  Joe and Heidi ran to their home town doctor and got tested.  Heidi came back a potential match.  They sent the results on to Mayo Clinic in Minnesota.  She went up and got further tests.  Not only was she a match, she was a near perfect match.  And healthy as a horse.  This beautiful soul, mother of two, wonderful friend of mine in her early 30's donated a kidney to save my dad's life.  Of course, they never told a soul they had been tested, or that they were going to Mayo for further testing or even that they were considering doing any of this.  They never said a word until my dad's birthday when they called him up and said, "we didn't get you a card this year, we got you a kidney instead.  Tell Jodi to top that one!"  lol.  (old joke)  On Veterans day, my dad and Heidi underwent surgery.  Everything turned out great, for both of them.  How do you thank someone for that?  For stopping their lives so completely to save the life of someone else?  I had no words.  

My dad got home in December, right before Christmas.  It was one of the best Christmases I can remember.  Heidi was absolutely fed up with people thanking her and making a big deal out of what she had done.  She saw it as something that needed done.  Not as the sacrifice and gift we all saw it as.  She suffered through the speeches my dad made her go to.  He was thanking her in the only way he knew how, loudly!  lol.  He was raising awareness for organ donation.  Those were the speeches he gave.  But in January, things changed.

Joe's mom, his hero, was diagnosed with Leukemia.  The prognosis wasn't good.  They did what they could for her at the doctor's office.  Chemo and meds.  She was too sick for even a bone marrow transplant.  We did the best we could to put together a benefit for Miss Connie.  Joe and Heidi footed most of the bill though.  Again, with a glad heart and as though it was just something that needed to be done, not an act of grace.  They kept up their spirits and hers.  They took her to Florida to Sea World, she had always wanted to go.  They drained their savings accounts and took different jobs to be there for her.  Time is precious.  

Miss Connie lost her fight with cancer just a little over a year since her diagnosis.  I found out when I called Heidi back the day I got the text.  Despite taking a job trucking where he was home every night, Joe still missed saying goodbye by 5 minutes.  I know he was beside himself because of this.  Heidi assures him it was a blessing in disguise.  

The wake was last night.  I went, prepared to comfort or help in any way I could.  What a found was a celebration going on.  A celebration of a life thoroughly lived.  This woman, who worked too hard because she had to, smoked and drank because she wanted to, and loved hard because that's who she was, was being remembered in the laughter of those who knew her.  What a woman she was to produce such a wonderful son.  Among the crowd were folks dressed in suits and Sunday best as well as folks dressed in jeans and leathers.  All standing together, united by this single woman.  

Today the sun was peaking through the clouds as we enjoyed a rare 80 degree March day.  We went through the formal funeral and I smiled as I thought of how Miss Connie would have just cringed at having to dress up for her last ride.  We left the stuffy funeral home into that warm morning and mounted bikes.  I again grinned as i looked at myself.  Business wear, high heels and leather jacket, all on the back of a Harley in the middle of a procession of people.  Before we started up, I heard Joe call back, "Let's make some noise.  Wake 'em up and let 'em know she is coming boys!"  And we that, we rumbled to life.  Tears did come then.  For all of us.  The thought on my mind?  It's okay now Miss Connie, we are gonna get you there.  We got you.  

At the grave side, the wind blew the preacher's words away.  It didn't matter though.  I was jubilant.  We had done it.  She was safely home, one last time.  Joe did his mom proud, as usual.  As I watched this beautiful couple walk away and stand in front of their bike, I hugged them both hard and whispered, "We woke 'em all up Joe.  They know she's home."  

Connie will be sorely missed.  When she left this world, she left it a better place than when she got here.  She came skidding in sideways, exhausted and beat up, yelling, "What a hell of a ride!"  I hope they have harleys in heaven Connie.  May God bless and keep you always.  

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