failure........

Jul 02, 2012

as i write *failure* i nearly cried......
i have just gave up my band is useless...i can eat everything and as much as i want
nothing phases me....
i started at 231 and i'm sitting at 198  being 4'11'' that's alot of weight.

then i had to see my band Dr. Dr. Billy.....he had lots to say and he really changed the way i was looking at things..
I'm not a failure it's been it's been 2years and 6 months since banded and i  still weigh
30 pounds less than when i started....he said i need to stop dwelling on the fact i was up to 60pounds gone

after i got hurt (well more knee hurt) during my marathon in November i can barely walk
and have had zero work outs because of it.. he said stop dwelling on being hurt you ran a marathon

my total kneereplacent is on July 24th i can't wait to be out of pain
the pain knaws at me 24./7
i did start doing pilates on a reformer it is AWESOME! not really for dropping weight but
gaining muscle is perfect i can suck my gut in all the way! my waist is 4in smaller and i havn't lost a single pound!

Dr. Billy is going to take out my lap band on Sept. 7th  (theres that failure word again)
but, at the same time he's trying to get my covered for the VSL.....
i haven't really read up on the gastric sleeve... and it is not as  severe as by-pass....all thought is should just
bite the bullet and do it.....
i'm 49 years old...my health is going to fail at some point  just like my joints have started...

off to the forums to read up!
sydney

and yes i will post a picture tonight finally!

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