I got hit on!

It's a match made in heaven- the post-surgery girl who is on a soft food diet and the monger at the seafood counter!  He sure was persistent.  Too bad he was creepy.  Kidding aside, I forgot how uncomfortable that can make me. How do you deflect this attention when it is unwanted?

Politely thank him/her for their compliment then walk away. If it persists then do not go back there.

I understand completely. I was always the fat girl with my girlfriends, so I never got hit on. After I lost the weight, I got hit on by men.

It is quite akward. I am a natural flirt, but it is just good natured flirting. Before, I never had to worry about men taking it the wrong way (or they just were not interested!). Now, they think I want them.

I agree that you should politely smile and say thanks. You can say I am flattered, but I don't think my husband, boyfriend, lover.... would approve. It is an excuse, but it works most of the time. In those occassions the person doesn't care, then smile and walk away.

When I lost the weight early on it really threw me for a loop.  Women would come up to me and say hello...How are you??  They were smiling...I wasn't ready for that.  Before (being about 300 pounds) they would give me extra room, not make eye contact, and walk by like I was some pervert or something.  The mental side of WLS is harder than the physical side.  Society treats you different.  You really have to get your head around this stuff or it can throw you for a loop.  You get treated better in business situation also...You're thinking...I'm the same person inside.  Why are you giving me the time of day now??  After awhile it passes and you're just out there living life like a normal weight person...

i had an old friend from high school (35+ years ago!) confess recently that he had "impure thoughts" about me...   it has made things a little bit uncomfortable...   i still value his friendship, but i don't want him to think he has a shot...  i adore my hubby and have no interest in anyone else, and made sure he knew that...  but the egotistical part of my brain is having a field day....  i mean, i gotta admit that it feels good to be noticed in that way... 

i don't want to be one of those *****sent the hell out of people who suddenly notice me when they wouldn't give me the time of day when i was fat... so i'm trying very hard to train myself to just say "thanks, i appreciate the compliment" and let it go at that...  i have noticed that people in general are more likely to acknowledge my presence in the world, and that is hard to get used to...  i wear sunglasses most everywhere i go, and that offers some protection from the discomfort of seeing how many people actually make eye contact with me now...

it's a whole new life...


jeris

I know this sounds stupid, but I think that is one of the reasons I gained the weight.  I get actually cared when men start hitting on me.  I know I have issues, but it is something I have to work through.  Why can't guys just be nice and polite?  

I know exactly what you mean.  I feel the same way.  It's like it sets off some alarm in me.  Nice and polite would be so much better.  The aggressiveness scares me too.