OT - Empty Nesters

What was it like when the last one left?

How long have they been out of the house? 

What's your life like now? 

My kids split time between my ex and me for a few years, but both had completely moved out 7 years ago. My youngest came home for 3 months about 4 years ago during his divorce (MAJOR difference in teen Adam and adult Adam!!!!!), and when he left, I did miss having him in the house.

As for now, it's me, hubby, and the puppy. We live a quiet existence because the kids live in NY & NJ, and I'm in NC. I love my kids and grandchildren, but I really like having the freedom to enjoy time with my husband and focusing on my career.

Lisa

My son left for college last year.  He is in the same town, but not at home.  I miss him very much but at the same time am very proud of him.  The biggest difference is that the dogs get a little more attention.   What a coupld of babies!! LOL

Steve

Island Girl,

I want your life!!!!!!     Do they need nurses (me) or people capable of building or fixing just about anything (hubby)? 

I have this sign hanging next to my front door but it doesn't seem to be working.

My youngest was married about 18 months ago to her Marine, and moved to San Diego, it was crazy loney around here until we finally got use to it, then her hubby was deployed and she came home to stay until he comes back, but now that he is due back in Oct she is gone again. My oldest daughter lives in Las Vegas and my son and his wife live about 45 minutes away with my first granddaughter. So it has been an adjustment, but the girls have got great places to visit and my son lives just far enough away that he can't have a babysitter every night (although that wouldn't be too bad).  you get use to it and the dogs become your babies

First one left about 12 years ago....last one about 3 years ago.....problem is they keep comming back with little people in tow!  Most recently we just got the little people (we have custody of two of the little ones).

However, for the period of time we were truley empty nesters...It was odd being alone....I wandered around the house not quite sure what to do with myself for about 6 months even though I had a fulltime job as a nurse.....I finished my 4 year nursing degree (I had a 2 year degree) and moved into a nursing management position (stupid move....should have stayed bored at work).....my hubby and I also did a lot of cruising as I am a bit of a cruise junkie!

I want an empty nest again...I hope it happens soon  

Our nest is currently empty.  But my DH is busily remodeling it, and when it is done, while it will have one less bedroom than it does now (he is incorporating the middle bedroom as a sitting room for the master), it will still have 3 more bedrooms, each with its own bathroom, and an exercise room as well (in the basement with no window, so not a legal bedroom).

"If you build it, they might come back."  Oy.

We have 4 kids between us - within the next few weeks they will be 26, 28, 29 and 32.  The three older ones are girls, all married.  The youngest is my son.  All but the oldest one live nearby.

The oldest had a baby a few months ago, with a husband we can't stand and who she may FINALLY be starting to realize is nothing but an albatross in her life.  She and her father (my DH) have been estranged for a few years, but have reconciled sufficiently in the last few months that she is coming out for 10 days WITHOUT her husband.  We do not know what to expect from her visit.  It may be straight up, 10 days and out.  Or she may be asking for asylum.  There are both good and bad things about either possibility.  I do NOT want a baby in my house, and even more, I don't want HER in my house (I love her dearly, but she has a very annoying personality) - but it would make my DH ecstatic if she decided to stay, and it would be the best thing for her and the baby, so I would find a way to manage.

The middle girls are in relatively stable marriages, and are both thinking of having babies soon.  We would likely be designated babysitters.  And fallbacks for marital problems.

My son is a lost boy, but stubbornly so.  He is currently renting a room from his stepsister and her husband, but they are about to move in with his parents to save money to buy a house.  We kicked him out of our house a few months ago, and I have seen no improvement in his attitude, including still not finding a proper full time job so he can afford rent (we paid his rent for 3 months to get him out of the house and help my stepdaughter and her husband, but that deal is over).  I am both furious with him, and scared for him - but we can't let him back again.  At least that's what I'm saying now.

And my father is 80, and living with his long-term sweetie who is well-to-do and won't marry him.  And he is in better health than her.  If she dies first, he can stay in her place for 6 months, and then he will be moving back in with us.  My DH adores him (as do I) so that's fine, but - well, it is my good fortune that he comes from very long-lived stock, and we will likely be taking care of him for a long time.  (Mom is back east, near my sister - we have a deal divvying up the 'rents.  My still single and childless brothers, in their 50s and poor, don't live nearby, and are going to be no help - in fact, there is a plausible scenario where THEY come to live with us at some point.)

So we better enjoy this momentary peace (if you discount the remodeling) while we can.

As for what it was like when the last one left - I dunno - it never felt that permanent, and there has been boomeranging already.  Maybe I should become too obnoxious for any of them to want to come back?

OMG this past weekend I took Heather to Johnson & Wales up in Rhode Island she is my one and only and we are pretty close and when they did the presentation I wanted to leave the room and cry my eyes out.  For me the hardest thing will be letting her fly I know for those of you that have that revolving door its crazy but my heart is wow its going to be so hard to shut my big mouth and back off.  I just can't see being on the bridle path and her not riding her horse next to me.  Gotta grab those tissues.