Did you tell your friends and family you had surgery?

on 7/15/21 6:28 am

I am a new post op. Thankfully I am on a good path with my weight loss. I am not yet where friends or family will question why I am losing weight and I am not sure I want them to know about the surgery. I know (and hope) that day will come. Did you tell others about your surgery or not? I hate lying about things but it's a personal decision and not sure I want to share.

on 7/15/21 8:37 am
VSG on 06/11/18

If you tell people about surgery before you have it, you open yourself up to well-intentioned criticism from people who haven't researched the surgery as much as you have. After surgery, I think that's much less of a risk (from what I've read of other's experience).

You're wise to think about this in advance, because there is the possibility people will judge you. You don't need to lie, a simple "I'm not comfortable talking about that" is fine. You can tell as much or as little as you want. If you decide to tell people, think about what you might say if someone reacts negatively, just in case.

As for me... well I tell anyone who asks how I lost so much weight. There are a couple of reasons for this. First of all, I knew that if someone did say something negative, it wouldn't bother me. As I get older, my "skin" has gotten a lot thicker. Also, people in Ireland are less likely to judge you; at least to your face. Finally, I wish someone had told me years ago that this was a practical option. I had heard of things like "having your stomach stapled", but I was under the impression that it didn't really work. So I want to spread the news! Everyone I've told has been very supportive. I haven't had a single negative reaction.

But that's me. If I were at a different stage of my life, or in different cir****tances, I would have made a different choice. You need to do what's right for you. Best of luck!

on 7/15/21 11:24 am

Thank you Wombat! Your sentiments resonate wth me. I hope I have the support from friends and family if decide to share. I think most of my friends will be supportive. Not sure about certain family members.

on 7/18/21 7:52 pm, edited 7/18/21 12:54 pm

I haven't had it yet, but thinking about what I will Tell people. Well, my Dr. did recommend it after I asked him to. I've been struggling with all the comorbidities for many years and afraid of going through what my mom went through and also a couple of my siblings. So I will tell them just that. It was a health concern and a decision that I chose to make. but I will only tell after the procedure os over and I'm losing weight.

on 7/21/21 5:40 am

I think that is a good response and very honest.

on 7/15/21 1:01 pm - Exeter, RI

I am 17 years out and didn't tell anyone but close family. I hear people talk now about it. Nothing has changed. They all think it is an easy way and start telling you that they or someone else can do it without surgery. Do yourself a favor and saving the headaches, don't tell. Most are still very ignorant to WLS.

on 7/21/21 5:43 am

I have heard others say that the surgery is the easy way out and it makes my angry because they don't know all that goes into the process-before and after surgery.

on 7/16/21 5:09 am
RNY on 06/03/15

I just told my immediate family and a few close friends before the surgery. Afterward I told other obese people if they asked (since we all know diet & exercise almost never works), but I told most normal-sized people that I was on a medically-supervised diet, doing low carb and exercising like a fiend. Most skinny people believe that schlock. It almost never comes up anymore because I'm over six years out. It's pretty rare now to run across anyone who either hasn't already seen me as normal-sized, or who didn't know me when I was obese.

on 7/21/21 5:45 am

I'm looking forward to being far enough out where people won't ask or know me as obese!

on 7/16/21 5:34 am

I told my family and friends from the start. Some family members had surgery before I did and they were open about it too.