Self doubting....anyone feel like this ever?

I began my marathon training three weeks ago. I've been running regularly (no breaks) for over a year and completed a half marathon in December. However, this year I'm going for the entire thing! I'm really excited, but I have days where I think to myself....what the heck am I doing?
I still have moments where I get embarrassed when someone finds out I'm training for a marathon. I haven't been overweight in almost three years....why do I still do this to myself? I am in great shape and I just have moments where I think I sure don't look like a runner. I imagine a "marathon runner" with little to no body fat and small breast (sorry men....if I'm providing too much info). I weigh 125 lbs., but I have hips, curves, and breast. Does anyone feel this way?
I'm not going to let it prevent me from completing this goal. I just wished I would stop all the negative thoughts from time to time.

You have nothing to be embarassed about! Keep going on your personal path and don't worry about what others think. Also don't worry about having a "marathon body"... if you complete the marathon (and I know you can!) then guess what? You have a marathon body :)

Keep pushing on!

Last year I ran my first marathon. I had done a half the year before but nothing farther. Three weeks prior to the full marathon I did my longest run which was suppose to be 18 to 20 miles. I ended up running 23 miles that day. Until that run I had doubts that I could really do it. On my way back to my car I realized how much I had ran and knew that I could do it. Major rush. At that moment I couldn't wait for the race. I ended up doing it in 4:21. I was never so happy. Some times when I am running in town I have to force my self not to look at my reflection in the store windows. If I see my self I do not see a "runner". I do not "picture" my self as a runner, but I do love to run! Hang in there and have fun!

pan head

So 2 things.

yes - I feel self doubt about all sorts of things. it's normal and I consider it part of the motivation to get off my ass and PROVE to myself I can do it.

The other thing - marathon runners come in all shapes and sizes. Don't you remember at your last race how different everyone was? Now you're right - the elite runners are super strong and lean, but that's because they run for hours every day. Doesn't matter what size you are or how long it takes, if you finish you're still a marathoner.

Which race have you entered? If you want a good laugh, you can see all my running commentary (including running the London marathon) on my blog. inchbyinch.typepad.com

:) j

i definitly do NOT look like a runner (i am 6 foot tall and weigh around 240, i have fairly low body fat but a bunch of loose skin and some lean muscle mass), yet i completed a half marathon last year, full marathon this year, and a half ironman this year.  trust in your training, you can do this!

I tend to think of endurance athletes as a certain body type too. But there is variety and I think there should be more of it so I hate thinking like that.

I don't know about you, but to me the marathon is the ultimate, scary, it must take incredible fitness to do kind of thing. I still subconsciously feel this even though I know I've done things that take more fitness. Let's put it this way: doing a marathon scares me more than doing an Ironman which has a marathon in it!

I guess I'll just have to DO a marathon to get over this weird thinking.

I use to doubt myself a lot when I tried to figure out how to stay with the pack.  I also use to run solo.  Now that I have my running partner and a running group, running is a way of life.  Runners come in all shapes and sizes.  If you are dreaming of becoming an elite runner, that is when that self doubt can overtake you.  Looking like a runner is simple, just put on a good pair of shorts and shoes and hit the road.  Just go out and enjoy running and enjoy accomplishing those long runs during your training.  Don't be embarrased because your training for a marathon,  How many people can do that?
Rob

Hey Girl,

It's all good. I get where you are coming from. I USED to feel a litle bit of the same way. When I did my first Marathon, my first half Ironman, first 100 Mile ULTRA Marathon, and certainly my first FULL Ironman. You are surrounded with very fit "Looking" people that don't have hanging flabby skin, and who are the model of fitness. I say I USED to feel apprehensive, until I realized that I am faster than 60%+ of those "Fit" people. Then I suddenly realized, I AM one of those people. You will too! At white Rock last year, you saw people of every shape, color, and size! Running and sport is for EVERYONE who has a desire, so, by default, you ARE a Marathon runner, and YOU WILL do this!!! And FYI (You didn't hear this from me) us guys call woman who have "Hips, Curves, and Breasts"... "Pace Booty" (or so I have heard)  :) . Get out there and rock it sister, you got this!!!

Oh Yeah... Are you coming to the OH Conference in Houston in November? You should!!!! I will be speaking there, you should bring the family down!!!

I'm sorry I'm just now responding to your replies. I guess I forgot about my "self loathing post" (thank goodness). Thanks for all your encouragement and support. You guys are the best! I feel much better now. I guess the "fat girl" in my head peeps out from time to time. Training is going well and the self doubt issue is getting better. Thanks again for the encouragement.