husband said I have no will power so is this surgery the right one for me?

Yes you are right, that was the first step to becoming clean I was sick and tired of being sick and tired of that drug induces roller coster, cocain to get me up, downers to bring me down, I was tired of it! And you are right, this time CAN and Will be diffrent..what do I have to lose except my life if I dont do the surgery from the complications of high blood pressure, not being able to walk anymore because of my left leg, my back that is always in pain! Thank you!!!!!!! for your kind words!

I have tired finding a counslor that deals in food conditions, found one but she has not returned any of my phone calls or the ones that I have left at the receptionist desk..

We all have lost hundreds of pounds.  You need to make the decision based on who you believe you are, not who your husband says you are.  Maybe it would be a good idea to see a counselor and sort things out?  A lot of people have second thoughts before surgery.  Is that what this is about?

Try calling the reception desk and schedule an appointment to see the counselor.  If they can't fit you in, ask for a referral to see someone else.  Don't give up!

The malabsorption from the RNY doesn't last that long so if you don't change your mental state and eating behaviors.....it won't work either.

 As someone else said, you will have to put in work to make the weight loss last.  The surgery gives you a tool to help you, but you also have to make the commitment to eating right and exercising.  You can make those changes with support.  If you aren't getting support at home, join a support group.  I have only had my surgery for a month, but I have already been to three events - 2 support groups and a christmas education event and party for my surgery center.  Hearing other people who have been through the same thing, who have the same struggles, and are still successful helps me.


Potatoes and Pasta are my all time favorite foods.  I could eat my weight in loaded mashed and fettucini Alfredo  I am dealing with a lot of mental hunger for those foods.  I have sometimes that I feel like I am just completely craving those foods.  I use the tools that people in the groups have given me to deal with those.  It also helps that since my surgery I have lost 40 lbs and 4 waist sizes.   My surgery center also funds a psychologist led group, a nutritionist, and an exercise physiologist.  They are also a COE, so provide a complete suite of tools for helping treat obesity.

One story I heard in a support group may help.  One woman related a story from her sister-in-law who had a RNY and thought that she could eat whatever she wanted.  She went home and started eating high carb foods, and eats snicker bars and other candy.  All of this and she's surprised she's not losing.

Talk to your doctor, mention your doubts, talk about your concerns and make sure they will help you follow through.  Use everything you have.  You do have to work to make it a success, but you don't have to do it alone.  There are people out there who want to help you succeed.  The most common thing I have heard from those who have gotten there is that they want to help pay it forward.  I am sure thats true where you are as well.  There are people here who want to help you too.

The surgery has already helped save my life.  I was in a quick downward spiral.  My friends and family were all scared for me, knowing if I didnt do something they'd lose me soon.  In a month I have been able to stop taking my insulin.  My blood sugars are normal.  I am healing quickly.  Seeing changes in myself every day is the best encouragement I have.  I know I will have rough patches ahead, but I feel confident I have the tools to deal with them.

131 lbs to go, and I can have a (small) baked potato again, LOL.  Best wishes, and good luck with your journey!

You have to decide IF you really want weight loss surgery. Can you make a life changing decision and not hate yourself when you vomit because you ate too much....can you live with yourself knowing that even two pieces of toast may make you sick ? For me, the answers to those types of questions were "oh my lord, I live for the day that eating too much might make me sick, and I would love to feel full after half a slice of toast !"

One of the negatives of any weight loss surgery is that people who have problems with addiction....be it to food or anything else....will often have transfer addictions when they can no longer eat the amounts of food that they did pre-surgery. I would highly suggest finding a counselor/therapist who not only has weight loss experience, but has experience in dealing with addictionss. 22 years is a long time to be clean, but your body may crave something, and when the food is taken away....many folks who have that addictive personality turn to other substances.

Weight loss surgery has changed my life. I am 55 years old. I feel fabulous, healthy and happy. But you need to figure out whether or not this is "right" for you in general before you decide on a specific surgery. Just my humble opinion, of course.

My hubby really worries about my will power also (the fact that I have none....probably ate it somewhere along the way).....we have seen people have complications as a result of noncompliance after WLS.  I will admit, I am somewhat of a "closet" eater.  Meaning hubby  finds candy wrapper papers in my car, ice cream in the freezer, etc.  Really have problems with carbs.  It does worry me quite a bit.  I was just thinking today .....why am I eating a meal, feel full, still stuffing my face but all I can think about is what I can find to eat sweet???  Crazy but true. Really hoping the chemical changes from VSG help me get on track.  As long as I stay away from carbs, I am good, but just one bite and it is all over.

RNY, Sleeve and DS are all restrictive.  It will prevent you from eating too much.  Early out you can eat very little.  If you overeat you become very uncomfortable to the point of needing to throw up.  It teaches you early to limit your intake.  As you progress and can eat more you are still restricted to smaller amounts of food.  You can love bread now but if it doesn't sit well in your pouch or sleeve you will quickly lose interest.  It reminds me of how you dislike food that you ate when younger then got sick.  You may have had the flu but since that is the food that came up,  you won't eat it anymore.
There is still willpower involved but the smaller stomach makes it much easier to control.  Malabsorbsion while temporary helps the weight come off faster while you learn your new eating habits.

My husband said the same thing about me and that I was impatient as well... but you know what the first 2 weeks while on liquid were the hardest for me and during that time it's not that I learned willpower it's that something clicked and I realized what my eating was doing to my body and especially my health.  I don't overeat because after I was allowed food I did it once and it HURT so bad I never wanted to feel that again.  Do I eat perfectly everyday... no.  Do I eat jun****asionally but it doesn't control me the way it use to  - I am in control of what I choose to eat now and as long as I log it I hold myself accountable and can blame no one else when that scale doesn't move.  So willpower now may just be the same as it was for me, I always felt hungrier before surgery and now I feel normal?? whatever normal seems to be lol