random rambling :)

Apr 27, 2009

so the past few days have been a bit rough. i havent been to the gym since last wednesday but i worked all 7 days last week, and since saturday have had my allergies completely kickin my butt..

i know, i cant lean on excuses and being tired i need to push thru this! 

i just took sudafed and im waiting to feel semi alive to head across town to walk at the gym (my outdoor allergies would hate me if i did the park right now).

i had some chicken for lunch. i have not yet had a protein shake today. i know i suck, but this morning i was running out the door for work and gagged and vommed the only sip i took out of the cup of the one for my drive to work! after that i dumped it out and said id try again when i get home. that hasnt happened yet, because my sinuses and everything are making me so uncomfortable.

i really hope my allergies are not this bad in oklahoma when we get there, but my oh so reassuring boyfriend told me a little while ago they may get worse :) thanks love you 2! lol. i need to get to walmart and get some more zyertic. always does the trick.

ok, so i have lost offically 35 pounds today. i cannot  wait to get the next 16 over with and be 299 again! its been a year since i have been under 300 and these first 50 pounds have really been killing me because they have only come on me in the last year. it frustrates me! right after i met my bf, we would eat out alot , experiance new foods and just not think about our choices sometimes. and after i met him 2 years ago out the window went my workout routine.
but now im back on track, and as hes said from the beginning of my surgery journey "ill support you no matter what decison you make, and love you always".. i love him so much and am the luckiest girl ever :)

so i also have been having like mini idenity issues lately. like people have been noticing my loss (to me its like 35 pounds ok i dont know how you guys see it!) and ive been thinking alot about the next 35 or even 50.. am i still going to see myself as the cute chubby girl then to? or the girl whos working on this journey and using this tool to the best of her ability?

i am so glad i have found oh. everybody here has been so inspiration and helpful to me since i started this journey almost a month ago when i got my surgery. THANK YOU GUYS!!! 

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