Cheryl W.

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I’m 7 years PO and I have NOT maintained my weight loss after RNY.  I have a history of being able to lose weight on a restricted diet and exercise get close to goal, then not maintain.  This has happened again with RNY. The only difference is that the regain cycle has been slower.

So here’s where I’m at.  I’ve gained 75 pounds, I’ve been diagnosed as pre diabetic, and I’m smoking again.  And as pathetic as it sounds I’m trying once again to reverse this predictable, sad cycle and get back on track. 

In the giddy days right after RNY, when the weight seemed to melt off, it was so much fun to experience the transformation. I don’t think I ever really got to my ultimate goal weight, and I look back on my blog posts and see I was over confident.  The initial weight loss was EASY, the real job is maintenance and that is WORK.

There’s no magic, it’s a simple formula, track food, exercise, I know, I know, I’ve done it before.

When starting the RNY process, I didn’t want to read the long time P.O. posts, they weren’t Exciting, or transformative. Well I shoulda, because maybe I would have learned about how hard it is to keep the weight off, even after WLS.

 

This has been really fun.  But I'm itching to tell someone, and I'm hoping I can hold off, because once the secret's out, well it's out and there's no turning back.

I recently moved to a new city, got a new job, and know virtually no one here.  I interviewed in a size 14 suit and felt powerful, now I"m a size 8-10 and 12 pounds from goal.  I'm obsessed with shopping in my new size (but still only at Marshalls, TJ Maxx and thrift stores- I'm cheap).  The two ladies who work for me, say they like to see what I come up with and wear to work, even though the work place is casual - jeans are OK, I still dress up, BECAUSE I CAN, and IT's FUN!

 Anyway, NO ONE knows I was morbidly obese.  In fact no one really remembers I was a size 14.  And no one knows I had WLS.  It's a secret, and I'm so happy with my progress, that I'm fighting hard not to spill the beans.

So OH friends, should I, or shouldn't I tell?  If I tell, is it just because I crave attention?  Would this be good attention, or negative attention?  Or is it better to tell, and pass the message that WLS is a wonderful process if it get's your life back on track, like it did for me?  I'm conflicted about my motivations.

I'm also coming up on a year of no smoking.  Should I tell folks I used to smoke?  It's like the same thing isn't it?  

Most day's I forget I was overweight and had surgery.  I feel so right and finally me.


 

Crossed another one my OH goals off the list today.  I bought BOOTS that zip up over my calves, and they look great.  So great I bought 2 pair, one brown, one black.  Sure, it's 97 degrees!  but DSW had their boots in, and I wanted a selection to choose from in my size, so, I went boot shopping today.  This was one of the first goals I wrote down last October when I first discovered OH and started my WLS journey.   I still have fairly fat calves, but some of the styles have stretch, and generous zips.  It was so much fun, I tried on every style.  Padding around in their silly little stocking socks, pulling out crumpled paper from all the toes. sipping my bottled water, and dancing to the music in the store.  When I finally decided on the pairs I wanted, I really wanted to tell everyone what a watershed event this was for me.  OK, I looked and now sound a little crazed, but honestly, I've never had a pair of knee high boots before.  I've only ever had cowbow boots, wide and unflattering at the calf.   I can't wait for cold weather now! 

Now there's just a couple of goals left on my list.  One is to be able to sit crossed legged on the floor.  I couldn't do it at a fat kid, I can't do it now.  My legs just don't bend that way, and now that I have less padding on the backside, it really hurts.  But to tell the truth, I thought this goal would come naturally, like being able to cross my legs seated in a chair (which feels great, and easy).  I think I might have to train for this one.  On the other hand, why bother?  I'll tell you why, I wrote it down, it mattered then, so I gotta finish the list, right?  

My second remaining goal is to run the Turkey Trot at Thanksgiving.  It's a 5 mile race in Charlotte, NC, a place I no longer live.  So I think  I'm gonna have to find a 5 miler race around the DC area instead.  It's either that or plan a Thanksgiving trip to Charlotte.  Maybe,  I'll change it up to a 10 K.  It would be fun to train for a 10K when it gets cooler, It sure would be brutal to try it now when it's 80+ at 5 a.m.  So it's gonna be the trot, or a 10K at Thanksgiving.  Let me tell you, I have a lot to be thankful for right now.  I'm feeling great, I'm feeling strong, I'm active and having fun.  My life has changed 180 degrees since December 15th, and I'm grateful everyday that I made the decision to have the RNY surgery.  13 pounds to goal, but I feel that I've reached my goals already, and so much more.

   

It's official,  I've lost 100 pounds, and celebrated in the best way today, by biking to Leesburg and back, a 33 mile trek.  I couldn't have done that 6 months ago, and it feels so good.  I feel so good.  

I've still got 17 to goal, and it's getting harder to lose, and harder to keep away from junk.  It seems I can tolerate just about anything food wise, and although I have restriction, it's no longer like at the beginning where I could eat only a couple ounces at a time.  Right now, I can easily eat 1500 calories in a day if I don't watch myself.  So that's what I'm doing, logging everything again and exercising daily.  I'm aiming for 1000 calories a day, 80 grams protein, and I'm trying to eat HEAVY proteins, to keep myself full.  It's too easy to eat the slider stuff... which was OK when I was newly post op, but now just slides right through me.  Protein drinks do that, and don't keep me satisfied long.

I'm also battling constipation.  This forum is so valuable for providing advice, and information about whether what you're going through is normal.  I've always had a slow system, but gosh, now, if I don't take miralax every other day at least, I get painfully stopped up, and the descriptions people have posted.... giving birth, baseball sized, etc.  are so true.  So in addition to my supplements, I'm a faithful miralax user.  Don't leave home without it.

Exercise is a joy and a burden.  It's easy to let it slide too.  But I really do enjoy getting stronger and faster, and fitter.  I get up and go to the gym first thing, and get it out of the way.  It's too easy to make excuses after work.  The one thing I've put on hold is running outside.  We have tons of sidewalks around my new home, and that's the problem.  The streets are busy, even at 5:30 a.m., and I can't run in the road.  The sidewalks have so many cracks, I'm afraid of falling.  I've fallen twice and the second fall I slid on the asphalt in the street, and scraped myself up badly.  I'm now gun shy of falling, so I'm back to the treadmill inside.   The workout isn't as great, but I guess, I need to push the speeds and inclines to make up for the cushy surface.  It's also great inside, as it is getting hot out there, and I can catch the news and weather while running, so I'm multitasking while exercising. 

I've moved during this journey, from Charlotte NC to just outside Washington DC in VA.  I'm loving VA, and am becoming much more active, determined to be a tourist here and experience everything.  I started a job (the reason for the move) and I'm loving that.  I had a long unemployment, over 2 years, and it's great to be back in the workforce.  I'm finding it difficult to drink enough water at work.  I get caught up in my tasks and forget, so my goals are not being met there at all.   I guess I need to get on a forum and ask for tips and tricks to keep my fluids up.

I've always loved shopping, and now it's fabulous.  I bought a size 10 pair of shorts today and a medium top.  Looks great.  The items I swore not to buy in size 14, but did anyway are swimming on me. So now I'm going to try and find a tailor that doesn't cost a fortune and see about having some stuff taken in, cause I really like some of the stuff I've bought.  My work is super casual, but I don't follow the norm, nope,  since I now can wear nice stuff, I'm gonna wear it.  Last week, I wore a dress or skirt everyday, even though most folks are in jeans and tops.  In fact, I'm saving buying jeans, until they're a size 8, most likely my next 17 pounds, aka. goal.  Then I'm gonna splurge and buy a great pair of jeans.  Who know, they might even be a size 6.

OK, Haven't blogged in a while, sorry this is so long.  I'll try and do better, shorter, more frequent updates.  But you see, life is so much fun now, it's hard to go backwards and focus on the weight loss stuff.  I have so much more to do.

Well, my 5 month surgiversary was May 15 and it passed with my hardly even noticing it.  At my 5 month mark I was at 167 pounds, which is 90 pounds lost from when I started this journey (10-25-10) and 70 pounds lost since surgery (12-15-10).  I'm now less than 30 pounds to goal, and feeling great.  Occasionally, I'll feel sick if I eat too fast or too much.  But I haven't had the foamies or thrown-up for weeks.  I'm tolerating all foods now, and the restriction of my pouch is really helping keep me in check.

I am still training hard at running.  I ran my 3rd 5K last Saturday, and didn't improve much on my time, but that's because the run was on the beach at Jekyll Island, and it was HOT, HOT, HOT.  It was almost 80 degrees, and I've been training mostly in the 60's.  Boy the heat sure does make an impact.  I still came in under 36 minutes, and funny enough, won first place for my age group.   I beat the second place person by 2 seconds.  It must have been that skinny older woman who kept passing me.  Well I wasn't going to stand for that, so I put on a burst of speed at the end, and sure enough beat her out for first place.  I really didn't know she was in my group, but I'm glad I did the extra bit at the end.  You know as I was running I stayed inside some tire tracks on the beach, that narrowed into the distance.  I kept telling myself that I was on the road to thin, and I was becoming narrow, and that running, and keeping running was the only way to get there.  Silly little motivational stories I tell to myself when running, really do keep me motivated.

I am absolutely loving my new job and Washington DC.  I officially move into my new apartment next weekend, so again, I'm gonna be busy for a while, as I get settled in.  My hubby is excited about the move too, and looking forward to exploring the new city.  It's a new beginning for both of us.

Keeping up with clothes is proving a challenge.  I've about given up with pants, because they keep getting too big.  Buying new ones means I need to shorten them, which is an added hassle.  So I've decided to stick with dresses for the summer.  They're easier to fit, you can slap a belt around the middle when they get too loose, and they still look good.  I'm trying to find stretchy knits so that I can buy smaller sizes, that will fit me longer.  Still, I don't want to buy anything expensive, because who knows what size I'll end up.  Right now I'm in a 10-12....and I have about 30 pounds to goal.  It's hard to find dresses with sleeves to hide my bat wings, so I've added some knit shrugs to my wardrobe.   Shopping is so much fun, and good exercise!

I'm officially a resident of DC.  I moved into my corporate apartment last Monday, and have officially worked for 1 whole week, so I feel, I can declare it's official.  Plus, I signed 12 month lease on a permanent apartment and joined a health club.  Again, putting down roots.

It feels so good to be back at work.  My confidence is soaring.  I'm having so much fun.  The people are so nice, the work is understandable, my new boss is great, my schedule is flexible, the office has casual dress code, and I'm going to be living within walking distance of the office.  So far everything is turning out great.  It was a tough 2 years being out of work.  I'm 100% convinced that the WLS and losing 70 pounds (at the time of interview) helped me get the job.   In fact, I think it was essential.  If nothing else, the success of losing weight helped boost my energy and confidence such that when an opportunity arose, I snatched it.  Plus, making a move from Charlotte to DC is such an adventure.  I'm giddy.

I'm reveling in the fact that no one I'm meeting will ever know me as an obese person.  Sure I have floppy bits on my arms and legs, so anyone in the know, would know by looking at me, but, they won't ever see the full blown, out of control, morbidly obese person I had become.  Instead, they're meeting someone in control, with goals and ambition, and confidence and right now a bit overweight, but slimming down rapidly. 

Today, I saw new digits.  169.6.  I'm less than 30 pounds to goal, and feeling great.  With the move, I missed a week on my exercise plan, but I'm now back on track, as I'm going to the new gym we joined.   Next weekend is my 5K at the beach.  I'm still shooting for under 34 minutes.  We'll see how I do this week on the treadmill.  

I'm a few days shy of my 5 month mark.  I'm struggling with my new schedule to remember to drink water, to take my vitamins.  But I'm certain, I'll develop a routine soon to make those activities more natural.

Hello DC!  Hello new life!
 

I'm picky and cheap.  I don't have to settle for less than flattering cuts, colors, or shoddy workmanship any more when it comes to clothes.  Also, I can shop clearance racks and thrift stores and find designer brands and good bargains that flatter and fit.  I start my new job next week after being unemployed for 2 years.  Nothing in my closet fit, so I have been acquiring, inexpensive items to hold me until I reach goal.  I bought a "power-red" dress at a thrift store that looks fab.  I would have never worn red when I was  250+ pounds.  Now I'm empowered to do so, almost shouting " look at me, listen to me".  Now lets see if they do so at my new job.

I've been busting my butt packing up my stuff, preparing to move.  Everything non-essential is going into a box, being donated or sold.  My husband will stay behind with the dogs until we have a permanent apartment to move into.  Staging all of this is tough.  Can I pack the toaster?  Will he need it?  Should I take the coffee pot with me, or will the corporate apartment have one I like?  I rather like the sparse look of the place without all the decorative do-dads crowded on shelves everywhere.  Do I need all this stuff?  Like the weight, I'm downsizing my life and getting rid of things that are non-essential and excess.  I feel somewhat guilty about giving it all to Goodwill, as I pity the poor souls who are absorbing all of my excesses.

That's it for now, gotta go pack some more.  My next Blog will be next week after I've started the new job in a new city.  Here I go.

Milestone today.  Scale showed 176.  I stepped on and off 4 times, so I know it's true (at least for today).  That is less than my DH (Darling Hubby) who is hovering at 177.  When I started this journey last October, DH decided to eat healthy too, and drop some weight.  So just like a guy, he went from 210 to 175ish in what seems like days.  He's been hovering around this range for 2-3 months now.  Today, I passed him by.  I'm waving to him as I speed downward.  Wheeeee!

Another NSV (non scale victory) yesterday.  I'm selling a lot of my stuff on Craigslist in preparation for moving.  One lady who bought my cast iron planters and garden fountain, said that "You smaller girls...." regarding lifting heavy objects.  No one, in my entire life has ever referred to me as one of those "smaller girls".   My reply, "Oh boy, you don't even want to go there..."  I almost went into the whole spiel about my WLS etc, etc. to a complete stranger.  I was so flabergasted.  Who me?  A smaller girl?  

So, from that standpoint, folks and circumstances have been stroking my ego lately.  It feels good after having been down so long.  This WLS was the best thing I've ever done for myself.

 

Today it's 4 months since my surgery.  Numbers wise, I'm doing great.  I've lost 58 pounds since surgery, and have 39 to "goal".  I'm now in the 170's. and feeling great.  I'm running, and doing free weights to tone up.  I am scheduled for my 2nd 5K race in May.  I've got my mojo back baby!

The really good news is that I got the job in DC that I interviewed for on Tuesday.  Its scary and exciting to plan the move from Charlotte to DC, but my DH is so supportive and I think excited too.  So many details to figure out.  The idea is kinda sad too, because that means moving away from my DS and DDIL.  But I got a job and after 2 years I was disparaging about ever finding something again.  Of course, there's still lots of contingencies, but what the heck, they can be dealt with and overcome.

I guess I'm gonna need to find a doctor to support me in DC.  I would think there's tons, but you never know.  

Anyway, more later about all these changes in my life.  I need to finish celebrating tonight (nudge, nudge, wink, wink).

Yesterday was momentous.  I had a job interview in DC and I went to it wearing a size 14 suit.   So what that the company was business casual.  I looked fabulous in my black pinstripe, with conservative white blouse, pearls and pointy toe pumps.  Just donning the uniform made me feel confident, and I know I pulled it off in the interviews.  Best of all, no one I met had any preconceived judgments about me or knew that I was morbidly obese just four months ago.  They just saw me as someone that is overweight (by about 40 pounds) like most of America.  Hey, I look pretty normal now!  Victory!

Looking employable for interviews was one of the reasons I had the RNY surgery.  I've been unemployed for about 2 years and I'm looking for a fairly highly compensated management position.  I know that people in general perceive obese job candidates in a negative manner and that the offers are lower in number.  I wanted to leverage my chances by losing weight.  In addition, I've gained confidence.  I'm sure it translated in my body language, my speech, my ability to answer tough questions fluently.  I hope, I pray, I get the job.  I need that confidence booster.

The idea of moving to DC is somewhat mixed.  I love big cities, but don't like the traffic hassles.  I also don't want to move away from my DS and DDIL here in Charlotte.  But DC is so fab.  It has tons of museums, restaurants, cultural activities like plays and music and festivals.  I would really love to live in the midst of it all.  But the job itself, is somewhat of a risk.  It's a smaller firm and the stock market is not trending great right now.   Oh well, worry about that later if I get the offer.

It's also great that I had the energy to sustain myself all day.  I got up at 4 for my 6:15 flight (it was raining on my drive to the airport).  I had back to back interviews with 9 people.  My flight took off for home at 9:50 and I arrived back at my house by 11:45.  The one negative was the shoes I wore.  Not good for walking in the amazing maze that is Dulles airport.  Ouch, I've got some mega blisters today.  I did great with food during the day.  I had a skinny latte at SB, and a protein bar as my breakfast (waited my 30 min to eat my bar), water on the plane, water throughout my day (but not a lot).  I had a soup/salad combo for lunch (didn't eat all of either), and a crab cake and a couple of fries at the airport for dinner.  I was nervous about the crab cake, but it ended up gurgling and churning through my system just fine.  The one thing I forgot to plan for was my vitamins.  Didn't take them at all yesterday, just plain forgot.

Today I start my new running training program.  I finished my couch to 5K, and just signed up for a coached program on Runkeeper.com that is supposed to get you to a 30 minute 5K.  Now that would be a miracle, because I just finished my first 5K in just under 40 minutes.  So that's a lot of time to shave off.  But even if I can shave 4 minutes, I'm happy, taking it down a little bit at a time.  My next 5 K race is May 21st at the beach!

Honest to goodness, I lost 5 pounds this last week.  I have upped my calories a bit, I haven't sloughed off any of my workouts, and I'm sure I expended 2 pounds of weight just yesterday in nervous energy.  I also had a stuck food incident on Sunday.  I ran with my DH in the morning for 1 hour, my longest sustained run so far.  I was ravenous when I got home, and I ate my lunch too fast.  Well it came back up over the course of Sunday afternoon and evening.  I react pretty severely when stuff gets stuck, and it takes hours of retching to clear it from my system.  So Sunday's meal plan was practically nil.

All in all, I'm feeling great, have tons of stuff to do today.  Off I go.