First Social Event Since Surgery

Jul 25, 2009

The sun was shining, birds where singing, and the grill was sizzling at my departments company picnic this afternoon.   I never thought of myself obsessed, addicted, or dependant on food but today it was really really clear how food plays a huge part of my social life. 

This was the first time in a long long long time that I wasn't cooking for the event.  In addition to being an A+ shopper, I am a bit of a gourmet chef and I love to cook amazing food for my friends and coworkers.  For the last several years I've always cooked at these events.  Not being the one in that role made me feel really out of place, like I was missing a part of me.  

Oh, and FINDING SOMETHING TO EAT, UGH!  At this point I am still on soft foods so I had half of a hot dog, a little potato salad and an applesauce cup.  I couldn't eat the apple sauce cause when I got to it I was full.   I got such weird looks from people - especially people's significant others who don't know me and certainly don't know I had surgery.  It was almost a look of "Fat girl must be on a diet."  Of course I can't NOT eat cause I would get the same look and questions on why I wasn't eating.  Damned if you do, damned if you don't.  

I also couldn't participate in the  kickball game, or play the pickup game of touch football.  It was definitely not the most enjoyable event in recent years.  Good thing I love the people I work with, they are all so supportive and understanding.  

Even though it was frustrating, I know that there is always next year.  Hopefully next year I'll be smoking hot and be able to fun circles around everyone.  

Okay I am going to bed now, Ciao!

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