I tried..

Aug 31, 2012

I've been trying to figure out when to tell my mom about my decision for the VSG surgery.  I called her today to see how things were going and I got out "I talked to a doctor about my wieght, you know since my blood pressure is out of control and stuff" ... and she cut me off.  I go the usual "it's your poor choices in diet, you need to cut out all soduim, cut out the junk, etc." and then she went on to tell me how she needed to lose weight too and she'll just eat a piece of toast in the morning instead of two, and so on and so on... that "once you get to 195 pounds, you know you gotta do something!" ...now, for my mother, that is definitely really heavy.  For me, I found myself thinking, yeah, I wish that's all it was.  I realized that she might have an idea of where I was headed with the conversation, and that's why she changed it.  I would have rather sat through 15 minutes of hearing about the garden rather than the do's and dont's of weight loss, again.

When the time is right, I'll be able to tell her. 

The more and more I research, the more sure I am.  I have no doubt in my mind/heart that this is the right decision.  I'm excited to continue and get a date, finally.  I'm looking forward to getting my Keishi excited too.  It would be wonderful if he hopped on the wagon and we went through this together to an extent.  A girl can hope!  I wish he would take a more involved role and proactive to look into it and discuss it with me.  He might be, and just not talking to me about it... he does that sometimes.  When things get serious, he clams up sometimes.

I have no idea where or what this blog is intended, or who might see it.  Maybe once I'm sleeved I'll be brave enough to put my starting weight out there.  This is a tool I'm going to use to look back and see what I went through on my journey and how I'm growing as a person.  Hopefully. lol

ps. The crappy feeling I was having the other night was an allergic reaction to Percocet.  Another pain mgmt option bites the dust.  I was so miserable this week that I could have strangled a teddybear. 

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