Nonny S.
4-17-06
Apr 16, 2006
I got a call today from my surgeon's office and my sleep study came
back that I officially have sleep apnea. Woohoo (subtle sarcasm!) I get the pleasure of going back to yet another sleep study and get tested with a C-Pap(sp?) machine. Then I get to take one home...Yeah!! (still more sarcasm) Like I'm not attractive enough when I sleep, let's add a noisy, bulky machine with tubes coming off of my head. At least this will all help with getting my insurance approved. I just laugh when I try to imagine what I'll look like. I keep picturing Pauly Shore in Bio Dome (Ok, I can hear you laughing. Shut Up!!! So what if I like Pauly Shore?) The episode when he and "Doyle" were getting high with the nitro and he had on the face mask like you wear in the dentist offices and he was making duck-bill platypus noises...Well, I thought it was funny. I'm going to have to call my brother down (he lives in the apartment above me) the first night I have it and imitate the scene for him. He would probably enjoy it.
"Hey, I'm a duck bill platypus! Baap! Baap! Baap!"
back that I officially have sleep apnea. Woohoo (subtle sarcasm!) I get the pleasure of going back to yet another sleep study and get tested with a C-Pap(sp?) machine. Then I get to take one home...Yeah!! (still more sarcasm) Like I'm not attractive enough when I sleep, let's add a noisy, bulky machine with tubes coming off of my head. At least this will all help with getting my insurance approved. I just laugh when I try to imagine what I'll look like. I keep picturing Pauly Shore in Bio Dome (Ok, I can hear you laughing. Shut Up!!! So what if I like Pauly Shore?) The episode when he and "Doyle" were getting high with the nitro and he had on the face mask like you wear in the dentist offices and he was making duck-bill platypus noises...Well, I thought it was funny. I'm going to have to call my brother down (he lives in the apartment above me) the first night I have it and imitate the scene for him. He would probably enjoy it.
"Hey, I'm a duck bill platypus! Baap! Baap! Baap!"
4-07-06
Apr 06, 2006
Today, I have been doing alot of reading on this site. I looked
through the memorial site (memo to myself: Let's not do that again!) and the
message boards and profiles. One profile struck me hard! She talked alot about Emotion Eating. My mom always said that her and I were
emotional eaters, but I guess I never knew what exactly that meant. It kind of scares me now that I know. I don't recall ever...and I mean
EVER...being physically hungery. Even when I dieted (almost to the point of anorexia in high school) I was always eating something. Whether it's carrots, cupcakes or just plain ice, I always put stuff in my
mouth. I'm scared of how this will effect me once I have surgery. Am I
going to be one of the ones who streaches their pouch out? I guess maybe I should start therapy before I have the surgery to get help with why I emotionally eat. Maybe with learning how to deal with it (I think I
know the reason) I will make a concious effort not to do it anymore, and help raise my son not to follow in his Nanna's, and Mommy's footsteps. Cause, I'm doing this to make my life better right? I guess I need to work on the whole package, and not just the wrapping.
through the memorial site (memo to myself: Let's not do that again!) and the
message boards and profiles. One profile struck me hard! She talked alot about Emotion Eating. My mom always said that her and I were
emotional eaters, but I guess I never knew what exactly that meant. It kind of scares me now that I know. I don't recall ever...and I mean
EVER...being physically hungery. Even when I dieted (almost to the point of anorexia in high school) I was always eating something. Whether it's carrots, cupcakes or just plain ice, I always put stuff in my
mouth. I'm scared of how this will effect me once I have surgery. Am I
going to be one of the ones who streaches their pouch out? I guess maybe I should start therapy before I have the surgery to get help with why I emotionally eat. Maybe with learning how to deal with it (I think I
know the reason) I will make a concious effort not to do it anymore, and help raise my son not to follow in his Nanna's, and Mommy's footsteps. Cause, I'm doing this to make my life better right? I guess I need to work on the whole package, and not just the wrapping.
4-04-06
Apr 03, 2006
I received a call from my PCP regarding my cholesterol labs done
yesterday. My Triglycerides are down from 316 to 222, my LDL is up from 119 to 175 and my total Cholesterol count is up from 221 to 260. She told me to stay with my low cholesterol diet and Tricor and they would re-check in 6 months, then re-evaluate me then. I also received my second call from the Weight Support System Center. Gina is going to send me a packet that contains a workbook, pedometer, measuring tape, etc. I told her about my posibly getting the RNY and she stated that she had that done a few years ago and will add the info to my chart so they can discuss post-operative information when they call. I really hope that I don't have to go through this center for a year before my surgery will be approved. It's just so pointless. We talk about the same things my doctor talks to me about and it's the same thing month after month (they call every two months instead of every month now.) I have been so depressed today. I have to deal with this @$$hole at work who is obese himself but feels compelled to make fun of my weight every chance he gets. I often eat at my desk and no matter if I am eating a salad or hamburger, he comments on how I'm always "shoving things in my face" and I would get more work done if I wasn't always on "lunch break". Mind you, I only eat during lunch but I don't binge eat. I mean, I'm sure I eat more in one sitting than say, Kate Moss, but it's not a huge amount. For the past year or so, I have been blowing him off or giving it back to him by saying "It doesn't look like you have missed any meals" because I have been thinking that maybe he is just insecure with his own weight and it makes him feel good to put me down. But he has now started attacking other aspects in my life. Like my failed marriage. He'll make comments over the CB radio (I work in the office for a trash hauling company) about how it's no wonder my husband left me (when he did not "leave me" I told him to get out). My job entails relaying missed stops to drivers and telling them to pick up extra stops and what not, so EVERYtime he gets upset with what I have to tell him, he insults me. Today he even made comments infront of my boss. I got so upset and offended, that I went off on him. When he left I approached my boss and apologized for not being able to hold my anger and asked what I should do from now on. Hoping that he will tell me that he will help keep the harassing talk at bay, but he said that I should not argue with him, just to let him go off and not to let it bother me. What???? I just could not believe he said that. If I was black or hispanic, and was getting a racial slur, then this guy would have been fired. If I was a dwarf or was mentally handicapped, and was getting made fun of for that, this guy would have been fired. I don't want him fired, but at least told "Hey man, you can't talk like that up here". If he was coming on to me and making sexual remarks, and would not stop after I asked him to quit, it would make me uncomfortable to be around him and afraid to do my job by talking to him on the radio. Once I would bring it to my boss's attention, he would at least get on to him, write him up whatever and it would stop. But what he is doing is making me feel uncomfortable to be around him and afraid to do my job, etc and I get my boss's advice of "just let it go?" I got so upset that I could not stop crying. I was crying so hard that I started to hyperventilate. While I was at work! Did my boss do anything? Say anything? No. I am going to start documenting every conversation/comment that is made to me and will notify my boss each time and if I have to report it to my boss's boss I will. I really don't want to make any waves until after my surgery in case they "find" something to fire me for, then I will be screwed. I just can't work like this anymore.
yesterday. My Triglycerides are down from 316 to 222, my LDL is up from 119 to 175 and my total Cholesterol count is up from 221 to 260. She told me to stay with my low cholesterol diet and Tricor and they would re-check in 6 months, then re-evaluate me then. I also received my second call from the Weight Support System Center. Gina is going to send me a packet that contains a workbook, pedometer, measuring tape, etc. I told her about my posibly getting the RNY and she stated that she had that done a few years ago and will add the info to my chart so they can discuss post-operative information when they call. I really hope that I don't have to go through this center for a year before my surgery will be approved. It's just so pointless. We talk about the same things my doctor talks to me about and it's the same thing month after month (they call every two months instead of every month now.) I have been so depressed today. I have to deal with this @$$hole at work who is obese himself but feels compelled to make fun of my weight every chance he gets. I often eat at my desk and no matter if I am eating a salad or hamburger, he comments on how I'm always "shoving things in my face" and I would get more work done if I wasn't always on "lunch break". Mind you, I only eat during lunch but I don't binge eat. I mean, I'm sure I eat more in one sitting than say, Kate Moss, but it's not a huge amount. For the past year or so, I have been blowing him off or giving it back to him by saying "It doesn't look like you have missed any meals" because I have been thinking that maybe he is just insecure with his own weight and it makes him feel good to put me down. But he has now started attacking other aspects in my life. Like my failed marriage. He'll make comments over the CB radio (I work in the office for a trash hauling company) about how it's no wonder my husband left me (when he did not "leave me" I told him to get out). My job entails relaying missed stops to drivers and telling them to pick up extra stops and what not, so EVERYtime he gets upset with what I have to tell him, he insults me. Today he even made comments infront of my boss. I got so upset and offended, that I went off on him. When he left I approached my boss and apologized for not being able to hold my anger and asked what I should do from now on. Hoping that he will tell me that he will help keep the harassing talk at bay, but he said that I should not argue with him, just to let him go off and not to let it bother me. What???? I just could not believe he said that. If I was black or hispanic, and was getting a racial slur, then this guy would have been fired. If I was a dwarf or was mentally handicapped, and was getting made fun of for that, this guy would have been fired. I don't want him fired, but at least told "Hey man, you can't talk like that up here". If he was coming on to me and making sexual remarks, and would not stop after I asked him to quit, it would make me uncomfortable to be around him and afraid to do my job by talking to him on the radio. Once I would bring it to my boss's attention, he would at least get on to him, write him up whatever and it would stop. But what he is doing is making me feel uncomfortable to be around him and afraid to do my job, etc and I get my boss's advice of "just let it go?" I got so upset that I could not stop crying. I was crying so hard that I started to hyperventilate. While I was at work! Did my boss do anything? Say anything? No. I am going to start documenting every conversation/comment that is made to me and will notify my boss each time and if I have to report it to my boss's boss I will. I really don't want to make any waves until after my surgery in case they "find" something to fire me for, then I will be screwed. I just can't work like this anymore.
4-03-06 *301 lbs*
Apr 02, 2006
Today I went to my 2nd month supervised doctor visit. I am officially now over 300 lbs. I also had my Cholesterol re-checked. Oh and I totally forgot to ask my doctor about my chest! Oh well, I have to come back in a week or so to have a lump removed off of my shoulder, so I'll ask her then. Other than that, there is nothing new. I'm kind of down because of the weight gain, so I'm going to cut this post short so that I don't look back on this at a later date and comment on how much of a b!tch I was when I was fat!!!!
3-30-06
Mar 29, 2006
I just called to check on my sleep study results (the tech said that
they would be ready in 3 days), but the voice mail of my surgeon's
coordinator said that she will call when they come in and that it could take up to 2 weeks. That seems pretty long to me. I mean don't they only have to read the chart? But, what do I know? I have been talking with one of my mom's friends, Betsy. She had the stomach stapling probably 20 years ago and then a RNY revision probably 5 years ago (or around there). Since her second surgery she has lost maybe 200 pounds (at least) and is itty-bitty!!!! She is such an inspiration and the only one I know personally who has had an RNY. Most everyone around here is having the Lap Band. She's been giving me advice and tips and all of her old clothes!!! Yay!!! She has some good taste and alot of the clothes are brand new. Literally! She bought a bunch of clothes for inspiration to her different goals and once she reached those goals, her style taste changed or didn't like the fit or just already was smaller by the time she pulled them out and never wore them. Alot of them are way to small for me, but I am using them as my inspiration for when I reach all my goals. Anyway, I'm thinking about getting another tattoo this weekend. My son, Luke, picked one out for me and it's fairly simple so it should be pretty reasonably priced. He wants to go with me and watch them do it, and he's all excited. I'm starting him out early ;)
they would be ready in 3 days), but the voice mail of my surgeon's
coordinator said that she will call when they come in and that it could take up to 2 weeks. That seems pretty long to me. I mean don't they only have to read the chart? But, what do I know? I have been talking with one of my mom's friends, Betsy. She had the stomach stapling probably 20 years ago and then a RNY revision probably 5 years ago (or around there). Since her second surgery she has lost maybe 200 pounds (at least) and is itty-bitty!!!! She is such an inspiration and the only one I know personally who has had an RNY. Most everyone around here is having the Lap Band. She's been giving me advice and tips and all of her old clothes!!! Yay!!! She has some good taste and alot of the clothes are brand new. Literally! She bought a bunch of clothes for inspiration to her different goals and once she reached those goals, her style taste changed or didn't like the fit or just already was smaller by the time she pulled them out and never wore them. Alot of them are way to small for me, but I am using them as my inspiration for when I reach all my goals. Anyway, I'm thinking about getting another tattoo this weekend. My son, Luke, picked one out for me and it's fairly simple so it should be pretty reasonably priced. He wants to go with me and watch them do it, and he's all excited. I'm starting him out early ;)
3-29-06 *298 lbs*
Mar 28, 2006
Yesterday I went to my Gyno appointment. I'm back up to 298!! Ugggg! The good news is that she is going to write me a recommendation letter eventhough it is not required. The more the merrier!! I still have not had a cigarette. I pretty much don't crave them at all unless I see someone smoking. Either on TV or in person, it doesn't matter. I guess I pretty much will always have a weakness for it, but I feel proud of myself for holding off. I almost cheated on Monday, but I told myself that it had been a month, do I really want to start over? Plus, I feel so much better! Certain things smell different and taste different. And friends and family and co-workers who smoke just absolutely stink now and I wonder..."Did I smell like that?" It definately is an eye opener as to how much smoking affects you're whole body and not just your lungs. Oh and my the redness on my neck and chest is gone. The weird thing though instead of red rectangles, I have like a rectangle patch of dried skin. I wonder if it's an allergy to adhesive, but I am almost 30 and have never had an allergic reaction to anything (except the occasional hay fever type symptoms). Maybe my doctor will know something. I hope whatever the problem is I will have a handle on it before my surgery. I would hate to go through all this while recovering from major surgery.
3-24-06
Mar 23, 2006
Last night I had my sleep study. No, my insurance is not going to
cover it, but they are billing me (aproximately $800!!!!!). The good news is that I was their very first customer at this location, so they may write some of the bill off. Yeehaw!! Oh, it was an experience! I did not sleep good at all since they wanted me on my back. And with that plus a hard bed, plus all the wires from my head to my calves, how do they expect anyone to sleep well? All the tech (who was ever so cute by the way ;) could tell me is that I definately snore. Big shocker there! Especially since my ex-husband's idea of a joke was to record me asleep on cassette and play it on our surround sound for all his friends. What an @$$!
Anyway, back to the sleep study...
The tech (did I mention he was cute? ;) also said that he noticed I had
a very slight apnea of some sort. He can't officially diagnose me, but
he said that my oxygen level may not have been low enough for the
doctor to diagnose me. But I will know in about 3 days. I hope they say I'm ok, I really don't want to go back and have this done again (even
though the tech was so cute, and we like all the same dorky shows, and he...oh, nevermind, I'm getting off subject again!) I just really missed my son and I hate sleeping without a TV and I'm still picking glue out of my hair!!!!
***Update***
It's now been about 16 hours since they removed all the probes and
wires and my neck and chest is having an allergic reaction of some sort. I still can see the red rectangles from where the tape was on my neck and the circles from the probes that were on my chest. Nowhere else on my body is acting like this. Also, the marks on my neck are now all puffy like blisters and real hot to the touch. When the burning started I started to feel like I was getting overheated and nauseous and had diarreha (like you really needed to know!!). If it doesn't go away by tomorrow morning, I am going to the ER.
***Further Update***
Ok, it's now Sunday night, almost 3 days later and the burning and
puffiness is gone. I still can see the red marks though. I don't think I
need to see my doctor, but I will mention it when I see her week after
next.
cover it, but they are billing me (aproximately $800!!!!!). The good news is that I was their very first customer at this location, so they may write some of the bill off. Yeehaw!! Oh, it was an experience! I did not sleep good at all since they wanted me on my back. And with that plus a hard bed, plus all the wires from my head to my calves, how do they expect anyone to sleep well? All the tech (who was ever so cute by the way ;) could tell me is that I definately snore. Big shocker there! Especially since my ex-husband's idea of a joke was to record me asleep on cassette and play it on our surround sound for all his friends. What an @$$!
Anyway, back to the sleep study...
The tech (did I mention he was cute? ;) also said that he noticed I had
a very slight apnea of some sort. He can't officially diagnose me, but
he said that my oxygen level may not have been low enough for the
doctor to diagnose me. But I will know in about 3 days. I hope they say I'm ok, I really don't want to go back and have this done again (even
though the tech was so cute, and we like all the same dorky shows, and he...oh, nevermind, I'm getting off subject again!) I just really missed my son and I hate sleeping without a TV and I'm still picking glue out of my hair!!!!
***Update***
It's now been about 16 hours since they removed all the probes and
wires and my neck and chest is having an allergic reaction of some sort. I still can see the red rectangles from where the tape was on my neck and the circles from the probes that were on my chest. Nowhere else on my body is acting like this. Also, the marks on my neck are now all puffy like blisters and real hot to the touch. When the burning started I started to feel like I was getting overheated and nauseous and had diarreha (like you really needed to know!!). If it doesn't go away by tomorrow morning, I am going to the ER.
***Further Update***
Ok, it's now Sunday night, almost 3 days later and the burning and
puffiness is gone. I still can see the red marks though. I don't think I
need to see my doctor, but I will mention it when I see her week after
next.
3-22-06
Mar 21, 2006
I went to my Dietician appointment yesterday. I met with the Clinical
Dietician, Melissa Feagley, at the Presbyterian Hospital of Plano. I
didn't think it would be very informative since I have been doing
research for so long and witnessing my mom's surgery, but I was wrong. She helped explain all (or most of) the fact vs myth regarding weight loss surgery and diet. I am so excited about starting her diet plan she made up for me!! I'm also thinking about attending some of her classes (once a month) before surgery. I want to beat all this information into my head so that I don't forget anything!
****
On another note, this morning I had another fall. I have very weak
ankles and I can be walking with no pain (or anymore than usual) and BOOM one of my ankles will just give out and I drop to the ground. This is very amusing for the people watching, and this moring it was a guy in a truck driving by who yelled out the laugh from the bully on The
Simpson's...
@$$!
Anyway, I have been doing better at not trying to stop myself from
falling since doing that can result in twisting my ankle and limping with pain for about 3 days. This morning for some reason I resisted the fall and now I sit here with a swollen ankle, popping tylenol, and cursing
myself for letting me get this heavy and praying that once I lose weight
this "problem" will go away.
Dietician, Melissa Feagley, at the Presbyterian Hospital of Plano. I
didn't think it would be very informative since I have been doing
research for so long and witnessing my mom's surgery, but I was wrong. She helped explain all (or most of) the fact vs myth regarding weight loss surgery and diet. I am so excited about starting her diet plan she made up for me!! I'm also thinking about attending some of her classes (once a month) before surgery. I want to beat all this information into my head so that I don't forget anything!
****
On another note, this morning I had another fall. I have very weak
ankles and I can be walking with no pain (or anymore than usual) and BOOM one of my ankles will just give out and I drop to the ground. This is very amusing for the people watching, and this moring it was a guy in a truck driving by who yelled out the laugh from the bully on The
Simpson's...
@$$!
Anyway, I have been doing better at not trying to stop myself from
falling since doing that can result in twisting my ankle and limping with pain for about 3 days. This morning for some reason I resisted the fall and now I sit here with a swollen ankle, popping tylenol, and cursing
myself for letting me get this heavy and praying that once I lose weight
this "problem" will go away.
3-17-06
Mar 16, 2006
I made my sleep study appointment for next Thursday the 23rd, but if my insurance does not cover it (which I doubt it will) I will have to
reschedule it for a time where I have the amount saved. I wish I knew a ball park for how much it may cost out of pocket. Their office is
supposed to call me back on Monday with the info so I guess I need to wait until then...hohum. I had to reschedule my Gyno appointment from yesterday to Tuesday the 28th because it was so hectic here at work, I couldn't take off. Other than that I don't know anything. Earlier I was so happy and in good spirits and now I'm just blah!! Maybe because I'm just ready for the weekend (hopefully!)
reschedule it for a time where I have the amount saved. I wish I knew a ball park for how much it may cost out of pocket. Their office is
supposed to call me back on Monday with the info so I guess I need to wait until then...hohum. I had to reschedule my Gyno appointment from yesterday to Tuesday the 28th because it was so hectic here at work, I couldn't take off. Other than that I don't know anything. Earlier I was so happy and in good spirits and now I'm just blah!! Maybe because I'm just ready for the weekend (hopefully!)
3-10-06
Mar 09, 2006
I made my appointment for my nutritional evaluation. It is for Tuesday
March 21st at 3:00. I am still waiting on Dr. Cribbins office to call
me with the information regarding the sleep study. On a down note, I
had a minor set back this week. My bills got mixed up and I forgot to
pay my electric. I had the money (cash sitting in my purse) but just
forgot to take it to the office to pay it. Well, the electric went off
and I had to pay $500 to get it turned back on. $130 bill amount and
$369 worth of penalties and deposit. I only had $600 saved up for my
surgery and now I have $100. Aaaaargh!!!! It seems like just when I get ahead something knocks me on my @$$! And this was all my fault because I am too pre-occupied with other things!
March 21st at 3:00. I am still waiting on Dr. Cribbins office to call
me with the information regarding the sleep study. On a down note, I
had a minor set back this week. My bills got mixed up and I forgot to
pay my electric. I had the money (cash sitting in my purse) but just
forgot to take it to the office to pay it. Well, the electric went off
and I had to pay $500 to get it turned back on. $130 bill amount and
$369 worth of penalties and deposit. I only had $600 saved up for my
surgery and now I have $100. Aaaaargh!!!! It seems like just when I get ahead something knocks me on my @$$! And this was all my fault because I am too pre-occupied with other things!
About Me
Howe, TX
Location
36.7
BMI
Surgery
10/11/2006
Surgery Date
Aug 31, 2005
Member Since
