My rebirthday!

Dec 17, 2009

My re-birthday!  Dec. 14, 2009.  I was so excited, nervous, and fearful all at once.  I have wanted to get the band for a long time, but kept putting it off.  I did weight watchers, "dieted", saw a nutritionist, and even had a personal trainer at one time.  All of these were successful to a degree, but were always short lived.  I knew I needed help in achieving my weightloss goal.  Having 2 friends in my MOMII group have such success, I decided to look more into this option.  After going through every emotion, I decided this was for me.  I needed a new "tool" to help my reach my goals.  The bottom line came when I went to Holiday World with my kids.. triplets Bella, Lexie, Rich 7 and Anna 5.  The triplets begged me to go on the liberty launch with them.  Finally I agreed and stood in line for 20 min. worrying about not fitting in the seat.  I looked at other heavy people to see if they fit, and was convinced I would be OK.  Well, I wasn't.  I didn't fit.  Two young men were trying their best to push down the bar so I could go on the ride, but nothing worked.  After what seemed like 10 min (more like 2) I told them it was OK and got off the ride....HUMILIATED.  At first I tried to tell my kids I got scared and that was why I did not ride it, but they saw what was going on.  Once the ride ended and I saw their face and how disappointed they were, I knew I needed to make a change.  A few weeks later I contacted my weight loss center and started the process.  I was like a kid on Xmas morning when Misty called to tell me it was approved.  I was so happy and relieved and thankful.  I know this is going to be a long and hard journey, but I WILL SUCCEED.  There is no other way for it to end.  Today is my chance to choose differently, and I am choosing to love myself and put me first for once!

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