ObesityHelp

So I am actually almost 7 months post op but I just had my 6 month check-up yesterday.  The doc. walks in and has a big smile on his face and says "These numbers look great!"  He thinks I am doing great and shouldn't have any trouble getting to his goal by my 1 year mark.  That would make me very happy.

I have broken my stall and started losing again, it isn't as fast but at least there is progress being made.

I am still exercising 6 days a week.  My primary doctor told me to take one day off a week to let my body rest and to prevent burn-out.  I have been using my Leslie Sansone videos, Couch to 5K on the treadmill, weight lifting, using a Total Gym, and doing a program called X-Factor:ST.  I enjoy working out, it soothes my mind as much as it changes my body.

I have been in a stall for almost two months.  I have lost 9 pounds since January 1st.  Only 1 pound this month and the next time I weigh (Tuesday) it may or may not still be gone.  

I am ticked off because I never got my honeymoon.  I have been feeling hunger since about day 4.  This "honeymoon" phase of extra easy weight loss with no hunger is supposed to last for the first six months.  Here I am not 4 months out and I am stalled big time.

I have increased my exercise to everyday alternating different routines, I lift weights and use resistance bands. I get my protein and water, I don't overload on carbs.

I feel like I was cheated.

Before surgery every thought of everyday was with regards to my weight.  After surgery I started to see the world differently and didn't stress as much about my weight.  Now all day long I think about how I am failing at this weight loss attempt too.

I feel like such a failure.

Yesterday marked my four months post op.  So far I have lost 81 pounds but I have gained so much.  My body doesn't ache, I don't get headaches all the time, I am more active, I have ridden in go-carts and amusement park rides with my kids.  My clothes are several sizes smaller already.  

I have been in a stall for 4 weeks now. Losing and gaining the same pound - I know it's a typical part of the process but it is frustrating.  I have upped my cardio, weight, and resistance training, so I know that I will break this stall its just a matter of when.

I feel really good.  I haven't gotten sick as much as I used to either.

I am so glad that I had this surgery.

My life has changed so much since surgery!  I have had a lot of NSV's since I last wrote.  I no longer shop in the plus sized section for clothing.

I am no longer considered "Morbidly Obese" Yay!

We celebrated my son's 12th birthday by going to a go-cart racing place, and I actually participated instead of sitting on the sidelines.

I have lost 60 pounds since my consultation appointment. Which means I am half way to my goal.

My family went on a weekend getaway a couple of weeks ago and I found a great product.  Microwavable pork rinds.  They are low on calories, sodium, are carb free, and high in protein.  They are my new fill in when I need a snack or am a little low on protein.  They give me the satisfaction of having something similar to chips and they are good for me.  Can't beat that!

I really need to start an exercise routine.  I know I have to, but I just can't seem to get motivated.

I am seven weeks post-op tomorrow.  Things are going very well.  I am seeing changes in both my body and mind.  Since my highest weight (August 2012)  I have lost 57 pounds, since surgery, I have lost 32 pounds.  My weight loss could be better.  I need to get off my ass and exercise, but 57 pounds in 15 weeks isn't too bad.  That's an average of 3.8 pounds a week.  So far my skin is holding firm and I appreciate that.

I have finally started to take care of myself in ways I haven't in 15 years.  I got a hair cut last week for the first time in 4 1/2 years.  I have also started wearing makeup.  I feel like I no longer look like a man and want to emphasize that.   

I was cleared last week to start eating a regular diet including raw fruits and veggies.  That has really helped me to get things moving internally which up to this point has been my biggest challenge.  Eating isn't really too big a deal anymore.  I always eat protein first, then have some veggies.  We eat out almost as much as we used to and I don't have any problems finding something to eat.  On the other hand I feel like I am cooking more too, I guess because I am cooking whole foods rather than ripping open packages of frozen convenience foods.

I had a couple of days a few weeks ago where I was really nauseated.  Since then I haven't experienced the hunger I had been feeling up until that point.  Now, I am only eating 3 meals and 1 protein shake.  Sometimes I don't think about eating at all and am thankful for my children needing to eat as it gives me a reminder that I too need to eat.

As long as I have a shake I have no problem reaching my protein goal.  My water intake is something I need to concentrate on, because it is so easy for me to come to the evening and realize I have only had 20 oz of water.  I am trying to fit it at least 20 oz between meals, so far so good.

My closet is dwindling.  I have already gone from a size 24 pants to a size 18.  Shirts I have gone from 24/26 to 20/22 but can fit into some smaller.  I have a difficult time wearing anything that is a little form fitting, mental rather than physical.

Mentally, I am doing really good.  There are days I wish I could eat the way I always have, I miss the sweets, I miss the salty, I miss warm bread, rolls, and tortillas.  Last night I really wanted to snack, so I had an extra protein shake.  Sure it was extra calories, but at least I benefited from the protein.  

I am taking each day as it comes.  It seems this journey has a constantly changing path, as soon as I get used to something, it changes.