Pain is for Stupid People

May 28, 2017

Hi, my name is Stupid!

So it turns out there's this one spot on my lower right belly (the upper belly not my apron belly which I suppose would be my lower lower belly, but hey, semantics). Yeah, so this one spot. It is not an incision location. it is just there, like maybe someone jabbed a blunt skewer through my flesh and happened to pass by this spot.

This is the spot that makes one look like a stupid monkey trying to reach for things and stopping midway as if he'd forgotten what was there juuust at his fingertips if only he could reach that itty bitty tiny bit futher. This is the spot that keeps one stuck in bed because they haven't bother to ask their significant other to switch sides of the bed with you. This is the spot that while on significant pain relief you don't feel, well not much.

Remember Day 3's blog about how the pain was good and "oh, look at me, I've not needed the delaudid" Fuck that bitch, she don't know what she's on about. Delaudid is our friend.

Just because you've got 4 holes in your gut that don't hurt doesn't mean you have to live with the "I can't walk" pain from that last little asshole!

Did I mention Delaudid is our friend?

So in summary for all you members of my clan, the Stupid Folks clan... get ahead of and stay ahead of your pain. The clinic will give you a prescription for more dope if you need it.

Oh, and by the way, just a casual observation... while counting your remaining pills and/or doses of medication, do so before you've taken it!!! Counting is an interesting concept that requires things like numbers, sequencing and logical thought. Or, better yet, don't count the doses, count on your team to help you out if you need more doses!

Stay tuned for the 'never ending blog', the 100 top 10 things I wish I'd known before having surgery.



About Me
Surgery Date
Oct 30, 2016
Member Since

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