fstoddard0818
I'm Single WOW that was short lived!!!!!
May 25, 2009
Today is not so good. I'm sad...I just returned from Miami for Bike Week . I have not heard from my man in 10 days. Yep, 10 days. I guess this is my punishment for going out of town. I texts him last night and said the following.
"I always choose the wrong people to love instead of just loving me, I rely on other people's love to make me whole and when they fall short I still blame me. But this time I wont carry the weight of your insecurities I'm going to move on, "No wait run to the nearest exit. I wish you well. No more texts or call from me and please do not respond back. " Sincerely.
I know this is the right thing to do but I feel so sad I want him to respond back with I luv u, I don't want to loose you , can we work it out? but I got no response. Don't men know we say one thing but want the opposite. Today is not a good day. I thought I could share my joy, fear, tears, and wow moments with him. Today is not a good day!!!!
I wanted to call on my best friend the one who's never left my side...My Food Buddy... she was no where to be found. So what do i do now ? How am I to cope with this hurt? For breakfast I want a IHOP steak omelet with sour cream and salsa. For lunch I want Famous Dave's ribs, catfish nuggets , pulled pork and a loaded baked potato and don't forget side of cheese fries . For dinner I want Cheesecake Factory Shepard's Pie with Onion rings and a slice of Triple Layer Black Forest Cake and last but not least my night cap yep, a shot of Petron Silver with a twist of lime, 1 Heineken and two Tylenol PM so I dont wake up till morning. Wow!!! I miss my friend. Today ain't a good day. Well talk soon family.
14 comments
"I always choose the wrong people to love instead of just loving me, I rely on other people's love to make me whole and when they fall short I still blame me. But this time I wont carry the weight of your insecurities I'm going to move on, "No wait run to the nearest exit. I wish you well. No more texts or call from me and please do not respond back. " Sincerely.
I know this is the right thing to do but I feel so sad I want him to respond back with I luv u, I don't want to loose you , can we work it out? but I got no response. Don't men know we say one thing but want the opposite. Today is not a good day. I thought I could share my joy, fear, tears, and wow moments with him. Today is not a good day!!!!
I wanted to call on my best friend the one who's never left my side...My Food Buddy... she was no where to be found. So what do i do now ? How am I to cope with this hurt? For breakfast I want a IHOP steak omelet with sour cream and salsa. For lunch I want Famous Dave's ribs, catfish nuggets , pulled pork and a loaded baked potato and don't forget side of cheese fries . For dinner I want Cheesecake Factory Shepard's Pie with Onion rings and a slice of Triple Layer Black Forest Cake and last but not least my night cap yep, a shot of Petron Silver with a twist of lime, 1 Heineken and two Tylenol PM so I dont wake up till morning. Wow!!! I miss my friend. Today ain't a good day. Well talk soon family.
4 Months Out And All is Well
May 18, 2009
Hi Family,
Its four months and I feel good. I can eat just about anything although I don't . I don't restrict myself at all. Most of the time I don't want the food after i get it , I eat a lot of fruit and chicken. My hair is thinning it was always short I cant see any falling out but i notice my hair is not as thick and a little lifeless.
I have all kinds of people talking to me at work about weight-loss (they don't know I had RNY) so I just listen and try to point them in the direction of eating right and healthy foods. I just say I eat no Carbs, No Sugar, No Fried and No Red Meat. But I really know it takes will power to cut out all those things without surgery but I cant tell them anything more. I chose to keep this my secret at work.
For the first time I wore white linen pants with the lining in them and wow white has always been my fear it adds 10 pounds. But I don't look that bad. I ate crabs this weekend and I dumped for 24 hours every 20 mins. I will never eat CRABS again. I had a episode of acne that appeared and of course i blamed it on the Vitamins and supplements I was taking see before surgery my skin was even toned I only wore a translucent powder for shine. But now I'm wearing concealer to cover up all the skin discoloration acne leaves behind. Well it wasn't the vitamins or surgery it was a old brush that probably had bacteria on it once i threw them away I stopped having breakouts.
I don't exercise much I need to do better . I do get in the water and vitamins I get most of my protein from food although i still drink Bolt-house Perfectly Protein I limit the intake. It has to many grams of sugar to drink it every day. I lost 7 pounds in a week and thought that was strange Id never done that before but I ain't complaining.
My love life is beginning to suck, my man is losing his mind and I feel so isolated. There's so much i want to do and experience, things that I didn't do because of weight. Hes just so jealous about everything. I been riding motorcycles since I was 12. Now he doesn't want me to ride with my MC group anymore. WTF!!! I go to Myrtle Beach or Miami every year for Bike Week and guess what he don't want me to go. Am I to change who i am to make him comfortable. Hell I been catering to people all my life, this is clearly a situation and some choices are going to have to be made soon, they may not be in his favor.
I went to a lingerie cabaret last Saturday so I wore Booty shorts and fishnets and YEP!!! the HATERS came out to greet me. I was shocked at how peoples facial expressions and body language tell the inside story. That's OK though i got mad luv from the dudes. That all for now I will check back in when i get to Onederland 4 pounds to go.!!!
4 comments
Its four months and I feel good. I can eat just about anything although I don't . I don't restrict myself at all. Most of the time I don't want the food after i get it , I eat a lot of fruit and chicken. My hair is thinning it was always short I cant see any falling out but i notice my hair is not as thick and a little lifeless.
I have all kinds of people talking to me at work about weight-loss (they don't know I had RNY) so I just listen and try to point them in the direction of eating right and healthy foods. I just say I eat no Carbs, No Sugar, No Fried and No Red Meat. But I really know it takes will power to cut out all those things without surgery but I cant tell them anything more. I chose to keep this my secret at work.
For the first time I wore white linen pants with the lining in them and wow white has always been my fear it adds 10 pounds. But I don't look that bad. I ate crabs this weekend and I dumped for 24 hours every 20 mins. I will never eat CRABS again. I had a episode of acne that appeared and of course i blamed it on the Vitamins and supplements I was taking see before surgery my skin was even toned I only wore a translucent powder for shine. But now I'm wearing concealer to cover up all the skin discoloration acne leaves behind. Well it wasn't the vitamins or surgery it was a old brush that probably had bacteria on it once i threw them away I stopped having breakouts.
I don't exercise much I need to do better . I do get in the water and vitamins I get most of my protein from food although i still drink Bolt-house Perfectly Protein I limit the intake. It has to many grams of sugar to drink it every day. I lost 7 pounds in a week and thought that was strange Id never done that before but I ain't complaining.
My love life is beginning to suck, my man is losing his mind and I feel so isolated. There's so much i want to do and experience, things that I didn't do because of weight. Hes just so jealous about everything. I been riding motorcycles since I was 12. Now he doesn't want me to ride with my MC group anymore. WTF!!! I go to Myrtle Beach or Miami every year for Bike Week and guess what he don't want me to go. Am I to change who i am to make him comfortable. Hell I been catering to people all my life, this is clearly a situation and some choices are going to have to be made soon, they may not be in his favor.
I went to a lingerie cabaret last Saturday so I wore Booty shorts and fishnets and YEP!!! the HATERS came out to greet me. I was shocked at how peoples facial expressions and body language tell the inside story. That's OK though i got mad luv from the dudes. That all for now I will check back in when i get to Onederland 4 pounds to go.!!!
Uploaded Pictures with History
Apr 13, 2009
For all of the emails I get about not looking like I needed the surgery, here is a glance in to the past and how my weight has been a struggle. When I first came to OH I got a lot of ridicule about not looking like the typical WLS patient and that might be true that I wasn't in the 300's however I was there just like everybody else and although Ive always been able to lose the weight every year it kept coming back. I saw the weigh coming back once again at 260 and that old person 290 was just around the corner.
0 comments
3 Month Post Op "All That Cry'n for Nothing"
Apr 13, 2009
Hi Family,
I did all that whining and boohooing for nothing in the last two weeks I started to lose again. This morning I reached for my belt and put it on when I looked down I actually had on my 15 yr old son's belt. I just stood there with disbelief and silence you could hear a pin drop. I know my waist had gone down but not like that I guess while I was watching the scale not move the inches where busy working in my favor. Ive masted the food thing now not nearly as hunger with the help of Vonda she pointed me in the direction of a new Protein shake call perfectly protein. Its so GOOD!!!! That's all for now I took a picture today with my new belt. Luckily my son didn't have school because I rolled out. LOL
0 comments
I did all that whining and boohooing for nothing in the last two weeks I started to lose again. This morning I reached for my belt and put it on when I looked down I actually had on my 15 yr old son's belt. I just stood there with disbelief and silence you could hear a pin drop. I know my waist had gone down but not like that I guess while I was watching the scale not move the inches where busy working in my favor. Ive masted the food thing now not nearly as hunger with the help of Vonda she pointed me in the direction of a new Protein shake call perfectly protein. Its so GOOD!!!! That's all for now I took a picture today with my new belt. Luckily my son didn't have school because I rolled out. LOL
Crashed and Burned!!!! OMG.....
Mar 23, 2009
Not much to say I ve been in a stall for 15 days I still weight 223. I'm disappointed, discouraged, angry and sad. Im doing everything im supposed to I eat right , do 30 min exercise, vitamins, hell I hate water but i drink it just because I need it. Some say I should increase my cardio to 1 hr . Well I dont want to, how come I cant just do what was prescribed in the beginning. Nobody said id have to alter what Ive been doing to get more results. I know Im whinning I just hate exercise . Today is not a good day.
4 comments
2 Month Post Op
Mar 08, 2009
Good Morning Family,
I have a couple things on my mind that I would like to share.
1. I created this goal of 40 pounds down by my 2 month post op. I'm 3 pounds short of my goal. Well I fell short but Im not a failure. I am 223 today and blessed. I stressed all last week about this goal really beating my self up. Today Im 100% ok with it, I realize Im not going to meet every goal I set out to accomplish but I am going to do the very best that I can and give it my all , enough said.....
2. Im offically in a relationship...I met my man back in November but wouldn't give him the time of day. Might I add hes a Personal Trainer which made it even worse. There was no way I would have him running me up and down Pennsyvania Ave in Boot Camp. I avoided him at all cost...I thought he wanted to train me. Well that wasnt the case. I forgot I prayed for this man and I believe god put us together at the right time in our lives I asked god for specifics and he delivered Im still amazed how he just appeared. His son had dropped a quarter in the store and he was reaching under a shelf to get it. I told him not to put his hand back there out of fear something could cut him etc. When I looked up his father was standing there just that simple "Ask and it is given" He has never forced his training on me, he loves me just the way I was. I did say was because it was ashame that I didnt love me and the weight. I would often ask my self "what does he want with me?". Hes fine with a gorgeous body and established . I never got the answer to that question but I can tell you after losing 37 pounds he wants me on lock down.. He's a little nervous and he should be. He says he doesnt want to lose me....THANK YOU LORD!!!! Below is my boo .. Now if I could only get my finances together. Thats the new goals for me no more weight loss goals. Getting my MONEY right are the goals for 2009. The weight will come of as god see's fit. But I can tell you I will be doing body-sculpting with my boo. Shante got a man at home.
2 comments
I have a couple things on my mind that I would like to share.
1. I created this goal of 40 pounds down by my 2 month post op. I'm 3 pounds short of my goal. Well I fell short but Im not a failure. I am 223 today and blessed. I stressed all last week about this goal really beating my self up. Today Im 100% ok with it, I realize Im not going to meet every goal I set out to accomplish but I am going to do the very best that I can and give it my all , enough said.....
2. Im offically in a relationship...I met my man back in November but wouldn't give him the time of day. Might I add hes a Personal Trainer which made it even worse. There was no way I would have him running me up and down Pennsyvania Ave in Boot Camp. I avoided him at all cost...I thought he wanted to train me. Well that wasnt the case. I forgot I prayed for this man and I believe god put us together at the right time in our lives I asked god for specifics and he delivered Im still amazed how he just appeared. His son had dropped a quarter in the store and he was reaching under a shelf to get it. I told him not to put his hand back there out of fear something could cut him etc. When I looked up his father was standing there just that simple "Ask and it is given" He has never forced his training on me, he loves me just the way I was. I did say was because it was ashame that I didnt love me and the weight. I would often ask my self "what does he want with me?". Hes fine with a gorgeous body and established . I never got the answer to that question but I can tell you after losing 37 pounds he wants me on lock down.. He's a little nervous and he should be. He says he doesnt want to lose me....THANK YOU LORD!!!! Below is my boo .. Now if I could only get my finances together. Thats the new goals for me no more weight loss goals. Getting my MONEY right are the goals for 2009. The weight will come of as god see's fit. But I can tell you I will be doing body-sculpting with my boo. Shante got a man at home.
3 week Post Op Doctors Visit
Feb 05, 2009
Hi Family,
First I would like to say thank you to all the OH friends that left me comments and I didn't respond. I'm still learning how to use this profile and didn't know I was to accept comments I'm sorry please forgive me it is never my intention to ignore friends. Now for the good stuff. I had my first WOW moment this morning ....something said try on clothes that you didn't wear this past summer ( The scale doesn't seem to be moving down as fast as I would like and Ive been discouraged) In the past Ive been an inch loser, but I was hoping the surgery would change that. Well low and behold my 18's fit again I tried on 14 pairs of jeans and every one of them had room left. I went from my tight 22''s back to my fitted 18's. So that clearly made my disappointment go away. I had my visit with Doctor Afram to day and I'm down another 9 pounds I wasn't all that excited I wonder why. Is this normal?? Has anyone has this experience. Dr. Afram told me that my weight loss is on track its just that I wont see huge losses but I will see consistent weight loss over a period of time. He stated that the heavier you are the more weight you lose. Patience my child patience.... I'm eating Talapia fish , shrimp and salad and I like it. In the past I wasn't really a meal kinda girl Id rather have Sour Cream and Cheddar chips the big bag) with a mountian dew to wash it down for a meal. My hair is growing like crazy I normally keep short hair and buy some when I want it long. But this is nice its probably all the vitamins i take I do the Bariatric advantage Multi, B12, Calcium Citrate and also I take Juice Plus multi vitamins to make sure I get all my serving of fruits and Veggies in each day. I have a treadmill at home but I went to the gym for the first time this past week. My mind told me I could get on the elliptical and get my work out on....I think not I lasted 6 mins I quickly moved on the the bicycle where I lasted for 15 mins I finally gave up and went to the treadmill where i was more comfortable it felt like everybody was watching me.
Well my next visit is in a month I hope to be down 20 pounds my goal is to be 220 by my 8 week post op I'm half way there.
0 comments
First I would like to say thank you to all the OH friends that left me comments and I didn't respond. I'm still learning how to use this profile and didn't know I was to accept comments I'm sorry please forgive me it is never my intention to ignore friends. Now for the good stuff. I had my first WOW moment this morning ....something said try on clothes that you didn't wear this past summer ( The scale doesn't seem to be moving down as fast as I would like and Ive been discouraged) In the past Ive been an inch loser, but I was hoping the surgery would change that. Well low and behold my 18's fit again I tried on 14 pairs of jeans and every one of them had room left. I went from my tight 22''s back to my fitted 18's. So that clearly made my disappointment go away. I had my visit with Doctor Afram to day and I'm down another 9 pounds I wasn't all that excited I wonder why. Is this normal?? Has anyone has this experience. Dr. Afram told me that my weight loss is on track its just that I wont see huge losses but I will see consistent weight loss over a period of time. He stated that the heavier you are the more weight you lose. Patience my child patience.... I'm eating Talapia fish , shrimp and salad and I like it. In the past I wasn't really a meal kinda girl Id rather have Sour Cream and Cheddar chips the big bag) with a mountian dew to wash it down for a meal. My hair is growing like crazy I normally keep short hair and buy some when I want it long. But this is nice its probably all the vitamins i take I do the Bariatric advantage Multi, B12, Calcium Citrate and also I take Juice Plus multi vitamins to make sure I get all my serving of fruits and Veggies in each day. I have a treadmill at home but I went to the gym for the first time this past week. My mind told me I could get on the elliptical and get my work out on....I think not I lasted 6 mins I quickly moved on the the bicycle where I lasted for 15 mins I finally gave up and went to the treadmill where i was more comfortable it felt like everybody was watching me.
Well my next visit is in a month I hope to be down 20 pounds my goal is to be 220 by my 8 week post op I'm half way there.
Im a Loser!!!! Hehehe....
Jan 21, 2009
Hi Family,
Well I had my 1 week post op and I was down 13.5 pounds. I can definitely live with that. The surgery experience was not bad my only complaint as so many of you guys was the Gas, Gas, Gas, DID I SAY GASSSS. OMG I worried the crap out of Dr. Afram over the weekend. But he was very patient with me low and behold after 2 enemas and 2 suppositories I was free like a run a way slave. One note I ate everything under the sun the weekend before my surgery and I have to say I paid for it in the end which made my intestines block causing my gas to be so bad water would even go down. He told me if I didn't get the blockage to move he would have to re admit me. The whole nine IVs and all. I headed right to CVS. Well Im getting all my vitamins and water in. I started my protein drink yesterday and had no problem getting that down either. I'm not eating much food though just yogurt and applesauce mostly. I'm not a fan of puree food but i like tomato soup. I sort of feel like I didn't have the surgery other than the rumbling in my stomach nothing feels different. Makes me feel like my new pouch is to big . Well I have my next appointment in two weeks I'll keep you posted.
3 comments
Well I had my 1 week post op and I was down 13.5 pounds. I can definitely live with that. The surgery experience was not bad my only complaint as so many of you guys was the Gas, Gas, Gas, DID I SAY GASSSS. OMG I worried the crap out of Dr. Afram over the weekend. But he was very patient with me low and behold after 2 enemas and 2 suppositories I was free like a run a way slave. One note I ate everything under the sun the weekend before my surgery and I have to say I paid for it in the end which made my intestines block causing my gas to be so bad water would even go down. He told me if I didn't get the blockage to move he would have to re admit me. The whole nine IVs and all. I headed right to CVS. Well Im getting all my vitamins and water in. I started my protein drink yesterday and had no problem getting that down either. I'm not eating much food though just yogurt and applesauce mostly. I'm not a fan of puree food but i like tomato soup. I sort of feel like I didn't have the surgery other than the rumbling in my stomach nothing feels different. Makes me feel like my new pouch is to big . Well I have my next appointment in two weeks I'll keep you posted.
If I have to have one MORE test I'll scream....
Dec 22, 2008
Hi Family,
Today is not a good day actually this weekend sucked. I just been in a real funk. I have done all that is required my Dr. Aframs office. Now I get a list of more appointments and more testing for pre admissions. I know I'm blessed I just don't feel like it today. I keep reminding my self that I didn't have to wait 6 months, I did not have one rescheduled appointment, all my test are fine, even my blood pressure is normal 121/80. I just want this over with . My daughter says why are you so sad. I cant explain it I'm just tired. Ive only been at this for what? 2 months. I have such respect for people that had to wait months and years.
I wont post again until after my surgery. Thanks for all of the support you've given me.
1 comment
Today is not a good day actually this weekend sucked. I just been in a real funk. I have done all that is required my Dr. Aframs office. Now I get a list of more appointments and more testing for pre admissions. I know I'm blessed I just don't feel like it today. I keep reminding my self that I didn't have to wait 6 months, I did not have one rescheduled appointment, all my test are fine, even my blood pressure is normal 121/80. I just want this over with . My daughter says why are you so sad. I cant explain it I'm just tired. Ive only been at this for what? 2 months. I have such respect for people that had to wait months and years.
I wont post again until after my surgery. Thanks for all of the support you've given me.
APPROVED!!!!!
Dec 05, 2008
Good Morning,
Just got my Approval and Surgery Date 1/13/09. I just want to that GOD for this second chance. I know with him none of these would have manifested. WOW!!!!
I had my Upper GI, Abdominal Sonogram and Chest Xray. I was told I have Gallstones. Dr. Afram will be removing my Gallbladder during surgery he says standard procedure he normally does thank god I don't think Id want to have another surgery anytime soon.
My last test of the 9th is the Cardiac test. I'm a little worried about this one since I have high blood pressure that is still not totally under control. But I'm gonna PRAY on that too. Ask and it is given. My PCP gave me some fluid pills to help with the blood pressure medicine hopefully that will work..
Until next time family. Talk to you soon.
2 comments
Just got my Approval and Surgery Date 1/13/09. I just want to that GOD for this second chance. I know with him none of these would have manifested. WOW!!!!
I had my Upper GI, Abdominal Sonogram and Chest Xray. I was told I have Gallstones. Dr. Afram will be removing my Gallbladder during surgery he says standard procedure he normally does thank god I don't think Id want to have another surgery anytime soon.
My last test of the 9th is the Cardiac test. I'm a little worried about this one since I have high blood pressure that is still not totally under control. But I'm gonna PRAY on that too. Ask and it is given. My PCP gave me some fluid pills to help with the blood pressure medicine hopefully that will work..
Until next time family. Talk to you soon.
About Me
Upper Marlboro, MD
Location
20.5
BMI
Surgery
01/13/2009
Surgery Date
Oct 24, 2008
Member Since
