4 months and counting!

Jun 11, 2010

Wow, time is flying by. So this is what is going on in my life- I'm going thru one of my usual "stalls" where my weight hovers at 220-221, so I'm "almost" 60 lbs down from my surgery weight. I'll be glad when it starts to drop again. The last few days I have been retaining a lot of fluid. i don't know if it's the heat or I'm getting too much salt. Nut recommeded I try diced ham since I have a lot of trouble with meats. I've been eating it with squash and with split pea soup. I tolerate it fine, but think it's contributing to the fluid retention.

For about the last 3 weeks I have been losing a lot of hair. It's a good thing I started out with very thick hair or I might be bald by now. I mean it just keeps coming OUT! even though I knew it was coming and that this happens to most people regardless of how much protein and vitamins they take, it is still VERY un-nerving when it actually starts to happen to you. I hope it slows down soon, in the meantime, I am trying to increase my protein to see if that helps.

Unlike my past dieting history, I try hard not to focus on "how much" I have lost so far, or how long it is taking me to lose, or how long a stall might last, etc. etc. But lately I have been frustrated by a couple of comments by people who probably mean well, but ....  A relative asked me the other night if I had "dropped a size or 2 yet?" I should have said "no, I haven't lost a pound yet!" I know that clothes can make a big difference because some days I look much smaller to myself and other days I can hardly tell much difference after 60 lbs gone. A friend mentioned that I was losing  a lot slower than another friend who had WLS a year earlier, but that was okay because I looked much "healthier" than she did while losing. That's good, but I don't want to be in a race with anyone else concerning how long it takes to lose the weight. I am trying so hard to stay positive and not give in to those old feelings of failure that have derailed me in the past. I just try to take one day at a time, to know that I will reach goal, that I am making permanent changes in my life and my habits, and this is not a race, there is no timeline I have to follow, just keep doing what I am doing and the weight will continue to come off. No negativity! But is sure has been frustrating lately.

Gotta just push it all out of my head and make more time to come here to OH. Haven't been able to get here much lately and it makes a big difference for me. I've gotta learn to accept complients graciously too. gotta quit saying "well I'm getting there but I've still got a long way to go" or some such thing. Just a simple sincere "thank you" would be better. Why does everything have to be so complicated?! You don't want to seem too focused on yourself or self-centered. You don't want to seem ungrateful for nice comments, you don't want to become a different person (at least I don't!). maybe I'm just making it seem to hard!

Well I'm gonna go check out the forums and Bariatric Buddies and try to catch up with what's going on. Be back soon.

Rhonda

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