what's with the pain?

Sep 13, 2012

So... two - two and a half  weeks post op everything's going great. I'm losing, the carb deprivation syndrome is behind me, I've had my follow-up with my surgeon and nut, my incisions are all uncovered and all the sites look great, a little vitamin E and the two small ones are practically gone, I get a big pat on the back and I'm finally graduated to purees. Good for me, right?

I am sitting in the doctor's office and complaining about pain akin to a hernia. Now, I had a slight hiatal hernia pre-op but the doc thought it was small and benign enough to just leave alone. Maybe I aggravated or made it worse? Maybe I put a little strain on my staples or the sutures (I have three because of the go-back surgery) in my stomach wall muscle? Maybe I tore something or herniated a different incision, maybe I.... shouldn't worry about it because the doc says it's just normal healing and if you have no vomiting you're fine.

So, I leave the office and go back to work with this pain. Now I have faced pain. In 2007, I cut all the fingers off my left hand with a mitre saw. I got most of them back, but my hand will never be the same. In 2009, I broke my toe while in Mexico so severely that it required surgery and an implant. Earlier this year I jumped from a roof, to a lower one at work and landed on a standpipe and tore my ACL and MCL , got a massive hematoma in my shin and broke all of the toes on my left foot in one fell swoop. These are just the highlights - I've had more hospital visits that Eval Kneival. They pale in comparison to what Sunday brought.

I spent Sunday, September 8th, just two and a half weeks from surgery, curled up in the fetal position in my bed alternating between trying to catch my breath and being on the brink of sobbing. I was sucking liquid vicodin from a bottle like a wino would swill MD 20/20 from a paper bag. I prayed a lot and called my surgeon's answering service. He didn't call back. The surgical fellow did and asked the same battery of questions - fever? can't tell. vomiting? no. dizziness, naseau balance problems? can't leave the bed. bowel movements? two in three weeks. His conclusion, "It's normal pain from healing, take it easy and call me tomorrow."

Tomorrow came and I suffered through a shower, grabbed my toiletry bag and went directly to Princeton UMC's ER. This cannot be normal. So, I'm OK when I'm driving - just standing up, laying down or walking. So, anyway, I'm driving out there. I call the doc's office at 9:01and of course only the wonderful and awesome (really - she's wonderful and awesome) receptionist. I tell her the deal - pain's a 10 outta 10. She tells me to keep going to the ER and she will send the doc there before he starts his appointments.

Four hours, six X-rays, an ultrasound and a 3D ultrasound later, still no doc. PA from the ER and the same surgical fellow. So, it seems I should have "played the lottery" since "the odds of this happening are so low that they don't list it as a surgical risk", but these guys put one of the go-back sutures into a nerve that wrapped around my back and ended in the stomach's muscle wall. He says, "I can't believe you could take the pain."

It took all I had to not freak out and kill him, plus I was hooked to an IV and writhing in pain. "I couldn't take the pain, that's why I called you and that's why I came here." How is this funny? It's not, right? Anyway, some Neurontin and horse choker Motrin later, I can stand up and walk. I can walk right over and get a Medi-Alert bracelet because now I have to take a nerve blocker. Really? Come on.

Moral of the story? I got 2000cc of ringer's, an IV morphine and a shot of local into my stomach with a syringe that looked something like a snorkel. A couple more prescriptions and I was back on my way. The IVs gained me about a pound and a half and three of the four meds I am on now cause weight gain so I had a slow week. I still lost two pounds and I can walk, bend and sleep - all of which are plusses. Next Tuesday is my 4-week and I hope to be graduated to soft-solids and get my 3-month blood panel script.

I'm gonna stick with this if it kills me, and it just might.

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