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Welcome to Tracy's WLS Journey
since
Since my RNY Surgery
JUNE 2003
June 25, 2003
I met with Dr. Haicken's Nurse Practitioner, Elise Hazzard on June 25th and received all of the paperwork to begin my pre-testing. I was very impressed with Nurse Hazzard as with all of Dr. Haickens staff. I had met with another surgeon where I felt hearded in and out but Dr. Haicken's staff was not like that. Very caring and thorough. :o)
OCTOBER 2003
October 17, 2003
I have sent in my "packet" including all consultations and test results. When they see that all has been completed, I will be called for an appointment with Dr. Haicken.
Now, I just keep my fingers crossed and wait!
October 22, 2003
My packet was received on October 20th(return receipt via US Mail)and when I called to inquire about a part of my record that I was told was missing a few days prior, I was told that the form was no longer missing and I was ready to be scheduled! My appointment with Dr. Haicken is on October 30th!
Happy Happy Joy Joy!
NOVEMBER 2003
November 03, 2003
I saw my surgeon, Dr. Haicken on Thurdsay October 30th. Office visit went smoothly. He drew a purple line on my belly to let me know exactly where the incision will be. It will only be about 4" long! My paperwork will be submitted to my insurance on Tuesday or Wednesday of this week and from there we wait for approval. I learned that I have to get a IVC filter. I will schedule that as soon as I can as it has to be done a number of weeks before surgery. Still keeping my fingers crossed for a surgery date THIS year! I'm dying of anticipation! This waiting game is so hard!
November 06, 2003
Happy Day, Happy Day! My paperwork was submitted for approval yesterday and today my surgeons office called to schedule my appointment for surgery!!! I am APPROVED! I was all ready for a LONG wait to hear anything. Getting more nervous by the day and I only had to wait ONE DAY! Life is GREAT! I could not be any happier. I cried when Dee called from the surgeons office. Now I will be counting down the days to my new healthy life! 37 days and counting!!! Thanks to everyone for your support! A BIG THANKS TO THIS WEBSITE!!!
November 13, 2003
Today I went for what I believe is my last appointment with Dr. Haicken before surgery. Looks like everything is a "go". I also had an appointment for a consultation on my IVC Filter. I will be having that "installed" (for lack of a better word) on November 25, 2003 through a vein in my neck. I am SO excited and can't wait for that day to be here. So far no nervousness, maybe that will come later... I have been wanting this for so long, maybe the nervousnes won't come at all.
29 days until my surgery!!!
November 24, 2003
Today is my 13th wedding anniversary. I get my IVC filter installed tomorrow. As of today it is only 18 days until my surgery! I can't wait!
November 28, 2003
I had my filter put in on November 25th as planned. I was at the hospital nearly all day. I arrived home, groggy and still sedated, at about 7:30 that evening. The anestesia wore off later that evening and when it did, the pain started. Everyone said this procedure was a breeze so I fully expected to be able to cook TG dinner. My right side was killing me. It hurt to walk, bend and lying on either side was excruciating. I drove all the way back to Morton Plant Hospital the next day after calling the radiology department and complaining of the pain, they said to come back. I saw both radiologists who just said, it'll go away, we have people come back with a dull back ache sometimes and that it happnes in younger patients sometimes, it is "seating" or stretching the vein, it'll go away. I tried to explain that this was NOT at all a dull back ache,(I have had two children and 4 major abdominal surgeries, I know pain!) but they just gave me a prescription for pain meds and sent me on my way with no examination not even a pat on the back. What do I know? I'm just the lowly patient! The pain got much worse to where sitting, standing, walking even at one point breathing was excrutiating. My husband was ready to rush me off to the emergency room. But I did what a good little lowly patient should do and took my meds. Today it is a bit better, but still there. Hopefully it will be gone within a couple of days. Don't let the radiologists make YOU feel like you are a sissy and know nothing! IVC Filters are not always a BREEZE! I DID go to the ER the Friday after Thanksgiving. After 11 hours, two IV's and two CAT scans, they sent me home calling it "muscle pain". HA! Thank goodness it is finally going away on it's own.(a week later)
DECEMBER 2003
December 07, 2003
Well, only six days until my surgery. I am stil not feeling nervous. I am however, very excited! I feel as if I have been waiting for this all of my life and am so anxious to begin my new life. Time is flying right now. I feel rushed as my daughters birthday is next weekend and Christmas is soon. Thank the stars for my wonderful husband who is taking two weeks off of work to take care of me and everything else and who has always been there for me. I love you John!
December 8, 2003
My surgery is Friday. I am getting more excited by the day. I just wanted to post a special thank you to all my friends and family who have been there for me, who call me, just to see how I am! There is nothing more special than that! You know who you are! Thank you, I love you all!
SURGERY December 12, 2003
************* POST OP *************
December 31, 2003
My surgery was nearly 3 weeks ago. So far I have had no problems with anything that I have eaten (knock wood). I have mostly good days now. My husband has taken my scale away from me as I was weighing too often and when the scale didn't move I felt bad. I am still thinking that this will be just like every other diet that I have been on...lose a little weight ...weight loss stops...gain more weight back. I am having a hard time grasping that I actually HAD the surgery and this time WILL be different. I have not seen enough weight loss to make it possible for my mind to change it's life long perception of dieting and weight loss. Maybe when I see a significant loss, then I will finally believe that this time it will be different. I do not know for sure what my weight loss is now, but it is approximately 26 pounds. Unfortunatly, my doctors office scale reads 12 pounds higher than my home scale did (when I still had it). My scale was never more than 5 pounds off from any other doctors office so I wonder if thiers needs to be calibrated. I'll check with my PCP's scale to see if I can get a truer reading.
JANUARY 2004
January 12, 2004
I am 1 month post op today! I have lost about 35 pounds and many inches everywhere. Clothes are fitting me differntly now. I am doing very well and looking forward to more weightloss!!!
January 29, 2004
I went for my 6 weeks check up today. I actually got to see the doctor instead of a nurse. This is only the 3rd time that I have ever seen him and I have been in his office numerous times. I didn't even see him after my surgery, I guess he had a substitute! I went in in an excellent mood, sang to the radio the entire 40 mile/Hour-thirty minute trip there. Got into the office relatively fast, doctor walked in, looked at my weight loss on my chart then said 34 pounds GREEEAT!!! He then asked a few questions, like what I had for breakfast today, dinner last night...I answered honestly. I had just gotten over the flu and have had a hard time keeping things down. Knowing that, I knew that I would have to eat SOMETHING because it would probably be about 4 hours until I got home and could eat again so I had a few oyster crackers just to fill the hole, I knew they wouls stay down. The night before I had created a veggie lasagna, diet said I could have veggies and cheese so I layered eggplant, squash, zucchini and 4 different kinds of cheeses into a lasagna of sorts. Well, as soon as I told the "doctor" that, he flipped out and started berating me. I could tell that he was angry at me. I tried to explain the crackers, but there was no explaining, no getting through! He just would not let up...Telling me "You are wrong..... you are SO WRONG! You are doing EVERYTHING WRONG! You are so off, WAY OFF" Just on and on... He said " You are doing everything wrong, you are going to fail, not lose your weight and all of your hair is going to fall out!" No matter how much I cried he just would not let up he kept telling me that I was going to fail and that I was DOING EVERYTHING WRONG! (based on his knowledge of just two meals) He said "I am going to write in your chart NON-COMPLIANT with DIET!" He made me feel as if he thought I was lying! No matter what I said, he would cut me off and go off on me again about how wrong I was and how I was going to fail. He said "Your weight loss is proof that you are not following MY diet!" (wait, I thought my weight loss was "GREAT" when I walked in the door?!) I didn't get to explain to him that I had been keeping track of everything that I ate and was doing all the right things! I never cheated! He said "You are going to fail, then come back to me and say I am a bad doctor because of it" I said " I would not do that" He said "Yes, you will, they always do." SO, I ate crackers?! Would you rather have me eat something that I would throw up and miss my appointment and ruin your day, or eat nothing at all and not eat for over 4 hours until I got home?! I didn't understand his abusive conduct toward me at all. I left his office bawling my eyes out for everyone in the office to see. I was utterly humiliated! My self esteeem was crushed! I went there feeling so good and left with the lowest self esteem that I can remember having. There, was the person that I was supposed to respect, crushing my feelings, ignoring my comments and generally being hostile toward me because I ate veggie lasagna and crackers! I cried the entire way home and for the next two days over this. I now have no one to talk to about my surgery, physician wise. I feel that he thinks that I am a liar ( I didn't lie about what I eat, that is why he yelled at me) I don't feel comfortable going back to him. I don't feel that he listens to me at all! I will not subject myself to his humiliation again. As I was walking out he said "It's not my job to make you upset" was that supposed to be an apology? I felt that he thought it WAS his job. Maybe humiliation works for some, but for me it made me lose all respect for this person.
FEBRUARY 2004
February 06, 2004
I went to my PCP today for a case of bronchitis. He checked my blood sugar. He said normal was 6.0 mine was 4.5! He said he will no longer call me a diabetic! All total my weight loss is 52 pounds from my highest weight before surgery, since surgery 42 pounds. Weight is coming off slowly but it is coming off and you just can't complain about that.
*****************UPDATE to JANUARY 29*********************
I have decided not to let the cruel uneducated comments of one certain doctor (not my PCP) get me down. I am a slow loser...I guess I always will be, always have been, why would anything change that? But I am losing! All he did was the surgical procedure, which 500,000 other surgeons could have done it exactly the same...I am the one who controls my weight loss! I gave myself this TOOL as I chose to have this surgery and it is up to me to use it! I will not be crushed into failing! Small/closed minded people will not get me down! :o)
February 12, 2004
This is my two month anniversary for surgery. I have taken pictures every month and can really notice a difference in my appearance. I can still wear most of my clothing but it fits me so much better. No more CLINGY tight shorts and shirts! I can really notice a difference in my face and neck. I feel good. Just started a new protein. Instead of the Whey shakes that I recently heard do not absorb well, I went on Prostat liquid. It is absolutely disgusting tasting, hard to choke down, but you only have to drink 2 tablespoons per dose so I am doing it. I have noticed that my energy picked up dramatically since I switched. I think I was not absorbing enough protein from the drinks and my food. This is a collagen based protein so it is great for your skin and hair and is much more absorbable. I highly recommend it!
WEIGHT LOSS CHART
Total Loss
Date Weight Loss Monthly
261 October -10
12-12-03 251
01-12-04 214 -45 -35
02-12-04 209 -52 - 7
03-12-04 199 -62 -10
04-12-04 187 -74 -12
05-12-04 178 -83 - 9
06-12-04 171 -90 - 7
07-12-04 164 -97 - 7
08-12-04 153 -108 -11
09-12-04 145 -116 -8
10-12-04 141 -120 -4
11-12-04 134 -127 -7
12-12-04 131 -130 -3
New Year...New Me!
01-12-04 125 -136 -6
08-02-05 103 -158 ?
09-22-05 99 -162 AT GOAL
ALL DONE!
February 17, 2004
Well, it does not seem that the antibiotics for the bronchitis are working. Either that or I am not absorbing my singlair for asthma as I have been having loads of attacks. Hard to tell when you have asthma AND bronchitis which is the culprit of the cough sometimes. I wonder if my immune system is not low since surgery as I have been sick 5-6 weeks out of the 9 weeks post op!
The diet that my dr. has me on is just not working out for me. I have only lost 6 pounds in the past 30 days and at not quite 10 weeks out, I think that I should be losing a LOT faster. I feel like this diet is not working for me and that I am wasting my "window". I do what I am supposed to do, and don't get results. I have been so strict with myself, I don't indulge in ANYTHING! I see so many people on this site that are about 2 months post-op, allowed to eat things that I would not have dreamed possible, and eating A LOT more than me, more often too and they are losing weight twice as fast as I am, starting out at relatively the same weight! If my dr. saw my weight loss for this month, he would completely blame me no matter how good I have been doing with HIS diet. I just don't think that he believes that some things work for some, not for others and that some people actually lose weight more slowly than others. I think that he believes that if you are a slow loser, you are a diet cheater and therefore you are going to fail! Since I have been working so hard on HIS diet and getting no results, I am trying a new one starting either tomorrow or the next day...as soon as I get it! :o) Trying to at LEAST lose 8 more pounds this month, that is my goal. Wish me luck!
February 25, 2004
Well I have been on the "New Diet" for one week. Weight loss picked up a tad, but the biggest change is that I FEEL so much better! All that meat was bogging down my system! Now that I am supplimenting my protein again, I don't feel that I have to stuff nothing but meat into my pouch to get in my protein. I am eating some vegetables and some fruits and doing so lessened my caloric intake. I am logging everything I eat and do onto www. Fitday.com (you should try it) and am staying WELL within the constraints of my dieticians recommendations with the new diet! I feel so much healthier! I am getting in MORE protein than recommended and this has improved my energy level too! Now I know I don't have to be a slow loser AND feel rotten too! Love the new diet! IT'S MUCH BETTER!
February 29, 2004
It is beginning to seem like the farther that I stray from my "doctors" diet, the faster the weight is coming off. With my new diet I feel better, have much more energy and the scale is actually moving! I took an after picture for myself. The difference is really noticable to me! I'll post it here so you can compare it to my before picture. Keep in mind, this is only after 11 weeks and way away from my actual goal.
MARCH
March 16, 2004
Yesterday I had my IVC Filter removed. It had been causing me a lot of pain ever since I had it inserted. This time they went in through the neck. The IV infiltrated (as usual) so today my hand is all sore and swolen. Not good for much. My neck is pretty sore, hurts to turn it or to use the muscles, hurts to the touch, but I'm sure this won't last too long. The hand on the other hand, (no pun intended) might take a while to heal. Hope I don't get another clot. Dr. Fischer mentioned that I was the first to get this particular filter. The doctor had a bit of trouble getting the filter out it seemed. He kept asking if it was supposed to offer that much resistance. I think it may have been his first removal as he was getting instruction and asking questions through the entire process. The twilight sleep didn't work much this time and I could feel everything. It wasn't bad though. I could feel him tugging on the filter and when he pulled it up through the vein. Everytime I felt something I would mention it to the doctor..."Here it comes"...or "you got it". After surgery he asked if I really felt it all, I don't think you are supposed to be able to feel anything in that area, I said yes, I felt it all. I said I think that I might have more nerves than most people. He said "yeah, you are more nearvy". lol But other than feeling kind of beat up and a tad dizzy, I am OK. Definatly glad to have the filter out and knowing that I will not be in pain anymore! :o) Today I weighed in at 198.2! Don't ya just love when the scale moves?
March 17, 2004
The IVC filter removal went fine and so far NO MORE PAIN! I think that did the trick! My BMI went down to 39.8 as of today. I now weigh 197. Therefore my BMI is so low that I no longer qualify for the surgery! :o) Gee, never thought I would be happy about not qualifying for the surgery, but since I already had it, its a great thing! I have been on the "new diet" for one month now and my weight loss for the month doubled! Last month I lost only 5 pounds! This month I lost 10 pounds. Still not as fast as I would like it but 10 pounds a month sure as heck beats 5 pounds a month! I feel like I am making headway! I feel like I CAN make it to my goal weight of 115 pounds! I might not be so jolly next week as the kids are out of school for Spring break! lol
April 2004
April 5, 2004
Today I stepped on the scale and to my amazement I was 189! I have now lost 62 pounds in less than 4 months! I went shopping yesterday and bought things to wear in "Skinny Stores"! I am so thrilled with my progress, I think I am doing great now! KNOCK WOOD!!! I have a new photo up now.
MAY 2004
May 5, 2004
Weight loss has slowed down considerably. I had an extremely painful blockage the first of last month and again this month. On the same day! Last month I was told to go have X-Rays taken, I did, but a month later, I still have not heard back from the surgeons office regarding the x-rays. WOW, are they on top of things or what?! Makes me so proud to have chosen this surgeon!(UGH) This time, I just figured it would resolve itself as it did last time. Took lots of Milk of magnesia and voila! Next day, feeling better. The scale finally moved today, I have only lost about 4 pounds since the 12th of last month. Looks like another bad weight loss month. Hopefully better soon! I weigh 183 as of this morning and that brings my loss to 68 pounds in 4.5 months or 78 since before surgery as I lost 10 before. Could be better but I look and feel so much better!!!
May 12, 2004
Today is my 5 month anniversary. I actually feel like I look "normal" now. Meaning a weight that does not make me stand out from the crowd. I have lost 73 pounds as of today and have about 53 pounds left to go to my goal of 125 pre-plastic surgery weight. I have lost over half of my excess weight and am very happy about that! Weight loss (knock wood) is again picking up. It seems to go good month/bad month/good month bad month on weight loss. Just a pattern of losing and body catching up, I guess.
May 30, 2004
I finally had a photo taken today that I like of myself! I think it is the first time since I was about 17 that I had a photo of me that I like! I have lost 75 pounds and still have about 51 to go to goal. I am getting compliments on how I look now. I feel pretty good about myself most days now! Actually looking forward to getting a new Driver license photo this month! :o)
JUNE
June 11,2004
I had a stall or plateau, whatever you want to call it. It lasted for about a month. It finally broke a couple of weeks ago. I am so glad it did, as they are so hard to get through. If I am not losing at least 10 pounds per month, I'm not a happy camper! Guess I better get used to it as I will be at 6 months in a couple of days! So far, I have lost 81 pounds since surgery and 91 total! I have lost more than my 11 year old daughter weighs! I have about 45 more pounds to go until I reach goal. I can wear basically anything in a size 18 and have been in that size for about 2 months! OK, I'm ready to move down to the next size!!!
Momma Angel Died today. What a great loss for our OH community. She was friend to us all and will be sorely missed. Bless you Momma Angel and Bless Momma Angel's Family! :o)
June 29
I am at 165 pounds now! Can't wait for the 150's! I have about 40 pounds left til my first goal. Almost seems attainable at this point! :o)
August 14, 2004
I have now lost 99 pounds since surgery and 109 since October. I am counting my weight loss as 109 now, I lost those extra 10 pounds on my own, and damn it, they count! :o) I have 37 pounds to go to my personal goal of 115. 27 left to go to my first goal of 125. I wonder if 37 pounds more will make me happy though. I still feel and look REALLY fat to me! I wonder if I will be satisfied at 115. My normal weight according to the charts for a 4' 11" woman is between 97 and 127 pounds. That is how I came up with 115, 97 would just be too skinny I think and being too skinny can be just as unattractive as being too fat. It just does not seem possible that 37 pounds away I will be considered THIN! I just cannot see myself that way. I can't wait for plastics, as I am just so unhappy with how my body has handled this weight loss. Body image is a tough thing to deal with. I think many of us were surprised with how big we were and never thought of ourselves being as huge as we were, now being as thin as we are is just as hard if not harder to deal with. I'm still pretty much on schedule to be at my goal weight by December according to fitday.com. Greatly looking forward to being a thin person! Yesterday was Hurricane Charley. All is fine, it missed our area.
AUGUST 22, 2004
A couple of new photos to add to the collection. These were taken yesterday and the other well, as you can tell were BEFORE the surgery! :o)
September
September 3, 2004
Last week I decided to get a makeover. I had all of my hair cut off for the first time since I was about 17. I have had many compliments and I love it! Here is the new me!
NOVEMBER
NOVEMBER 3, 2004
I thought that you all might get a kick out of my latest photo. Before is Halloween 2002...Look ma, no neck! After photos is a few days ago. :o)
JANUARY
January 07, 2005
December was so busy and went by so quickly that I had no time to update. I have had several requests to update so I am making time now to do so. I went to my 1 year appointment and had to toss into my doctors face that on my last visit to see him, he told me that I was going to lose all of my hair and was going to fail! He said "I did???" then explained how many non-compliant patients that he deals with, he rattled off a "sorry" then went on to say what a success that I was. Gee, guess it turns out that I was NOT one of those non-compliant patients as he had decided to lable me as afterall! :o) The girls in the office were all excited about my weight loss and such that they said they would like me to be in the doctors newspaper ad and maybe in the upcoming edition of People magazine that the doctor (I guess) will be featured in. I wouldn't sign the release forms. It would only be benefiting the doctor and no one else and I can't say that I can still forgive him for the bad treatment that I received all those months ago. I did this, I have struggles to make this work for me, not him! He left me feeling that I had not medical support group so I was on my own. OK, bitterness out of the way...:o) This morning I weighed 126.2!!! Only 1.2 pounds from my goal weight of 125. My favorites jeans are a size 6. I started out in a size 28! I thought I would be finished when the year was over, but I still have a few more pounds yet to go PLUS plastics. I want it all done! I was supposed to see the plastic surgeon today, but when I called yesterday for directions, they could find no record of my appointment. :o( SO, I have rescheduled for the 17th of this month.
I have peopel now emailing me for advice and such. My best advice to you is EDUCATE YOURSELF!!! Learn EVERYTHING that you can about this surgery BEFORE you try to take on the challenge. You will have a better outcome do to the fact that you know what to and what not to do and also what you can expect. You will never know it all prior to having it and probably even after over a year, I still don't know it all but I spent 4 years researching this and went into it with open eyes. Read ll the profiles on Obesityhelp.com. Look to the before and afters for inspiration and know that YOU too can have your after picture there too. If you have learned all that you possibly can then you are ready to take this on. It isn't always a piece of cake, it isn't always easy but based on my own personal experience, I would never recommend that someone not have this surgery because it has been such a life changing and wonderful opportunity to find ME again. Now I just pray that I am able to keep this up and remain thinner, as I am today. I take nothing for granted, I still go day to day. I wish you the best of luck!
January 08, 2005
I reached my goal weight today! I set a goal of 125 at the beginning and have finally reached it! What a Good day!
AUGUST 2005
It's been a while since I have updated. I have had my lower body lift and inner thighs done by Dr. Baddoura on June 16th. I had many complications, not due to the doctor but from old adhesions. I had a bowel obstruction due to this and nearly died. I now weigh 103 pounds and am really a bit too skinny...I know, you are thinking "poor baby, HA!" My goal weight was 115, but I realized that I looked better at 105. I am still swolen from all of the surgeries, both plastics and life threatening ones, and am looking forward to feeling like myself again. It has been a long road recovering from this one. I spent 15 days in the hospital. I still have all of my upper body surgery to go through. I hope to have that in September or early October. I will post new photos soon. :o)
SEPTEMBER
September 25, 2005
I have finished losing weight. I now float between about 105 and 98 depending on the day. I think I like 98 the best! :o) I wear a size "0" (zero) jeans. I truly never thought that I would ever be this thin. I am so thankful that I am. I don't think I will ever tire of comments like "Tiny", "Skinny", and "Little". Unfortunately I am not able to pay
