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Moms Candy Dish Test !!!

frisco
on 5/2/12 1:45 pm
 
Since my mom has been on her own.... I try and check in on her weekly....but it ends up being more like twice a month......for sure on SJ Group nite. I try and make it so I sleep over to spend time with her and get a true feel for what's going on and do some repairs around the house.....

My mom is sooooo on board with my meals......and portions.....never serves me rice, bread or potatoes....Always a "Moms" meal....Cornish Hen, Shrimp, Crab, Salmon, Steak, Japanese Stir Fry and a great veggie....Sesame Soy Green Beans, broccoli, Artichoke, Sunomono (J style cucumber salad) ....well...you get it...good VSG eats !!!

Now... the Candy Dish.... I get it....it's the Grandma thing to do for the grand kids and such.....for me I never could manage a candy dish system....to me...if you put it in a bowl....it's for immediate consumption.

So...every time I'm at moms.... the candy dish is always fresh and replenished.....Mini Heath Toffee bars, Hershey Kisses, Mini Kit Kats........

So, during the nite.....a few here a few there..... wake up in the morning and see wrappers on the nightstand......So maybe a total of 12 candies through the night !!!!

Sure..... I can ask mom to not have that out when I'm around and she would conform....But after thinking about it.....That's Bull**** That's for amateurs.....Nobody has to cater to me (unless their on my payroll) I'm supposed to be far enough along to make the proper choices and decisions.

So.... I learned/realized a few things...... I've lost the weight and maintained well....but I am by no means "fixed".

I don't even feel bad for eating the candy..... It's a "Sweet" reminder that I still have "issues"

This is where the pressure is really on !!!!

All the Main Forum peeps that are whining about this or that....I get it...I lived it.....

But WL is like Stage 1 in this process.......

Having WLS and losing the weight is by far my biggest life accomplishment..... every other accomplishment has had it's challenges, but always seemed fun in comparison.

In contrast, gaining the weight back.....would be my biggest undoing and failure......

I failed Moms Candy Dish Test........But learned I still have basic issues to work on......

frisco



SW 338lbs. GW 175lbs. Goal in 11 months. CW 148lbs. WL 190lbs.

          " To eat is a necessity, but to eat intelligently is an art "

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edelu
on 5/2/12 4:15 pm - los angeles, CA
Is it bad that i want to come to your mom's house?
Cookster
on 5/2/12 4:27 pm - AZ
Ho Boy, do I hear you! My dear friend had her birthday today so I said I'd bake a cake. Well....... I decided to go 6 steps further and made bread pudding....then I decided to take it to another level (I really love this girlfriend) and I took the bread pudding and turned it into a bread pudding souffle. It was incredible. But (BIG but here!).....I couldn't have a tiny taste..NO-O-O.....I had to have a full portion. Well, right now I'm in a sugar coma and feeling like CRAP! No one force-fed me, I made the choice to make the dessert and then made the decision to EAT the dessert. I'm still fighting the mindless eating. It was stupid, but I'm kind of glad I did it. I know that I won't die from this lapse. But I am reminded that the demons are still as real as they were many pounds ago. I'm still terrified I'll gain it all back, so....I have to remind myself to eat tiny portions or no portions at dessert time. Five of us ate this dessert, so I figured that there was about 2 cups of sugar in the final dessert - that's over 5 oz per person. Yeeks!!! Back to protein shakes tomorrow. Gotta lay off the sugars. I know this is a ramble, but I'm in a sugar-induced coma right now.
PaulaS
on 5/2/12 11:06 pm - TX
Good post!   You are always so precise with your portion control, it is good to know you can get off track, too.   I think it is human nature to do that every so often!    Makes it easier to stay on track.
At least you are well into maintenance, and not 3 weeks out which kinda sends a different message!
I know I feel guilty the few times I get off track, but I shouldn't feel that way - just get back doing the right thing!
You have been an inspiration of "what to do" for me!   Thanks!

                
Highest weight, 248#
Surgery weight, 236#
Current weight, 138#
(deactivated member)
on 5/3/12 1:54 am
I don't know what you are talking about Frisco, because I am always, always perfect with my food.  NOT.  I too have lapses and I am certain that I am not "cured" from my obsession with food.  During my losing phase, I really was perfect.  I think I was so scared to screw this thing up, that I never even considered cheating or going off of my program, not even once.  Of course it only took me 6.5 moths to get to goal, so it's not like I get to wait long. 

Since being in maintenance, I have learned to live with my obsessive thinking and other imperfect attitudes and behaviors around food.  I basically follow just a few simple rules and not stress too much about it most of the time.  The only area where I am still, and always will be, quite vigilant is when it comes to my daily weighing.  I am convinced that for me, not being an ostrich is the main issue in maintenance.  I can always go back on program as long as I am not willingly looking away. It is not that difficult to lose 3-5 pounds, it is the 10+ pounds that scare me.

Between you and me, I too would have a small mound of wrappers around the house if there was a candy dish anywhere near me.  I don't get the concept of a candy dish, to me it is a serving dish for me to clear. 
ThinLizzy
on 5/3/12 2:34 am - Benicia, CA
Hey, as long as you don't have your OWN candy dish! I have a huge sweet tooth, too, so I sympathize. Honestly, I've done the same thing--amazing how much candy we can hold. It's all about learning how to live with our own individual quirks and food triggers. But I don't think food "issues" are just a problem for the obese and formerly obese. My sister, who has never been REMOTELY overweight (she took after our model-like super thin mother) lives on the WEIRDEST stuff, like for days she eats nothing but Skittles, bags and bags. And then she switches to sunflower seeds and lamb kidneys. I'm not kidding, it's bizarre, but because she's never had a weight problem, somehow they're not "issues" for her.

Lizanne


Starting BMI-38.5, Surgery 08/14/07

diane S.
on 5/3/12 4:18 am
This a really interesting issue. For those of us for whom candy is crack (mine was Reeses Peanut butter cups) can we ever trust ourselves to eat just a modest amount and leave the rest?  I don't know the answer to this. Right now its the "one day at a time" idea that i won't eat this candy right now, maybe another time.

Now I have had small amounts of chocolate or very thin slices of dessert but I totally have not had one chocolate chip cookie or one reeses peanut butter cup since before surgery. I really fear it would be all over if I did.

I agree that we should not ask friends and family to put away the candy dish or not serve certain things or go out of their way to accomodate us. Most of my friends understand what I can't do so its easy.

So its still an open question and one worthy of more thought and study. Hope we can all work on this together. 

Diane

      
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Lina P.
on 5/3/12 6:25 am - Bolton, Canada
We ALL have issues. We're never "fixed". It's like alcoholism, I suppose.
I've always said it's worse to be addicted to food than alcoholism or quitting smoking because you still need food to live.

At least you recognized it, right?
That's the most important thing. :)
Height: 5 ft - Age: 42
Bougie size: 36 oversewn to 34  
 CW: 135 lbs
Happy in the 130's but... On to my second goal!

    
(deactivated member)
on 5/3/12 6:31 am, edited 5/3/12 8:24 am
It's amazing, no matter how far along we are, no matter how successful we are, that obese food addict still lives within us.  I so get it about the candy dish.  Candy is my crack and I cannot even have it in the house.  I would have woke up and counted the wrappers as well just like you did Frisko.

Last night I was in Target shopping with my daughter and had a serious craving for chocolate.  My daughter suggested I get a sugar free cocoa from the Starbucks inside Target.  I went over to the Starbucks and asked the employee if I could see the ingredients list on the cocoa because of food allergies.  She brought me the box and I saw that the cocoa was processed on the same equipment as wheat/gluten which made it unsafe.  I whined "darn, I want chocolate so bad, but I'm on a diet"  That sweet girl offered me a cup of ho****er and a stir stick and asked if Swiss miss sugar free cocoa was safe, because I could buy a box in Target and put it in the ho****er.  I thought it was a great idea, and it is gluten free/safe for me. I went ahead and did that and enjoyed my 60 calorie sugar free treat and it killed the craving.  I was grateful and impressed by this teenagers understanding and compassion.  It's a rare thing.  And I am really glad to have been able to have a treat without going off plan! 

tripmom02
on 5/3/12 6:42 am - NJ
 Ugh, I failed this yesterday. My grandmother is in her late 80's but still on her own, I go over once a week to check on her and spend time with her (really, the only thing she cares about is that I bring the baby LOL). Usually I avoid all the crap she offers and puts out for us, but yesterday she had Kandy Kakes and I gave in. Didn't feel guilty about it b/c it fit into my calories and carbs for the day, but I could have had a whole chicken breast and veggies for the same cals/carbs I put in my mouth with those cakes. 

I am a work in progress, I am not fixed and never will be completely, but I do the best I can every day and have the results to show for it. 

Courtney - Lap band to VSG revision
      

    
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