**willow**
revisions
Aug 03, 2005
8/3/2005
Went to see my plastic surgeon. He thinks he might be able to make the rippling in my implants better but probably won't be able to eliminate it since I have very little breast tissue to cover the implants. It is a dilemma, Love the size, hate the ripples. I look wonderful in clothes but wanted to look as good naked too. vain? yes. the only person who is going to see it has been married to me for 27 years and loved me at 260 pounds & probably doesn't care one bit about the ripples or even notice them like I do. I even have considered just having them removed, Lots to think about over the next couple of months. HE ALSO SAID HE WILL REVISE MY THIGHS!!!!! I am so happy. Lipo around the knees and nip in the skin a little more. I think it will make a lot of difference in how I see my body. I have been so freaked out about this and it is such a relief to know it will get better. I go back in 2 months and if he thinks I am healed well enough he will schedule me. I don't care if it isn't until next year as long as I know it will happen.
I am making an addition to this post that I should have added a very long time ago. I was afraid to post what was really going on as my PS had read my blog before and really let me have it over something I had posted. He took huge offense over me posting that I had an infection, yelled at me pretty much til I was in tears. Prior to this visit with my PS I obtained 2 other 2nd & 3rd opinions from other board certified plastic surgeons. I was feeling like he was not being totally on the level with me. I have never posted what they told me and I should have. My plastic surgeon lied to me. He gave me a bull shit story about a special type of breast lift he was doing. It was a made up story, all he did was place implants. He also told me he placed the implants under the muscle, that was the plan preop and what he told me post op that he had done. Both of the other ps told me the implants were absolutely and unequivicolly over the muscle. That is why I have such severe rippling. Had he done the proper lift and placed the implants under the muscle I would likely not be having these issues. They both also said the thigh lift was poorly done, and that if it were their work they would redo it, free of charge.
At the time all this was going on I was severely depressed over the complications and quite frankly feeling pretty trapped finacially on having revisions. I was in debt from the loans I had taken for the original surgery and did not have the money for revisions, and did not have resources for more loans either. I was hoping my surgeon would do the right thing and make right on the surgeries he had taken short cuts on previously. I do not know why I continued to place trust in aman who had so blatantly lied, and done substandard procedures before.
0 comments
Went to see my plastic surgeon. He thinks he might be able to make the rippling in my implants better but probably won't be able to eliminate it since I have very little breast tissue to cover the implants. It is a dilemma, Love the size, hate the ripples. I look wonderful in clothes but wanted to look as good naked too. vain? yes. the only person who is going to see it has been married to me for 27 years and loved me at 260 pounds & probably doesn't care one bit about the ripples or even notice them like I do. I even have considered just having them removed, Lots to think about over the next couple of months. HE ALSO SAID HE WILL REVISE MY THIGHS!!!!! I am so happy. Lipo around the knees and nip in the skin a little more. I think it will make a lot of difference in how I see my body. I have been so freaked out about this and it is such a relief to know it will get better. I go back in 2 months and if he thinks I am healed well enough he will schedule me. I don't care if it isn't until next year as long as I know it will happen.
I am making an addition to this post that I should have added a very long time ago. I was afraid to post what was really going on as my PS had read my blog before and really let me have it over something I had posted. He took huge offense over me posting that I had an infection, yelled at me pretty much til I was in tears. Prior to this visit with my PS I obtained 2 other 2nd & 3rd opinions from other board certified plastic surgeons. I was feeling like he was not being totally on the level with me. I have never posted what they told me and I should have. My plastic surgeon lied to me. He gave me a bull shit story about a special type of breast lift he was doing. It was a made up story, all he did was place implants. He also told me he placed the implants under the muscle, that was the plan preop and what he told me post op that he had done. Both of the other ps told me the implants were absolutely and unequivicolly over the muscle. That is why I have such severe rippling. Had he done the proper lift and placed the implants under the muscle I would likely not be having these issues. They both also said the thigh lift was poorly done, and that if it were their work they would redo it, free of charge.
At the time all this was going on I was severely depressed over the complications and quite frankly feeling pretty trapped finacially on having revisions. I was in debt from the loans I had taken for the original surgery and did not have the money for revisions, and did not have resources for more loans either. I was hoping my surgeon would do the right thing and make right on the surgeries he had taken short cuts on previously. I do not know why I continued to place trust in aman who had so blatantly lied, and done substandard procedures before.
mistakes
Aug 01, 2005
8/1/2005
It is not the mistakes you make in life that matter but what you learn from them .
Use your mistakes / perceived failures to your advantage. Use them to know yourself better, to change for the better and be a person you are proud of.
I have to remember this!
It is not the mistakes you make in life that matter but what you learn from them .
Use your mistakes / perceived failures to your advantage. Use them to know yourself better, to change for the better and be a person you are proud of.
I have to remember this!
Important notice! I offended my PS with my posts
Jul 14, 2005
********* Important notice**************************************
7/14/2005
Apparently My PS has read my profile and is offended at what I have written. I want to clarify for his benefit. I did not mean to imply that he in any way caused my infection. The groin incision is in a warm moist area, warm moist areas are prone to infection. I HONESTLY never would have thought anyone could construe that to mean I thought the Dr. gave me an infection, especially when it cropped up a couple weeks post op and I had antibiotics for a week immediately post op. Infections can & do happen regardless of the best of surgeons. In my case I am quite sure it had nothing to do with the surgeon, It is just how my body reacted. I am removing all reference to his name as not to cause further offense. I publicly apologize to him if I have caused any undue embarrassment for my writings in my online journal. I also want to add that in our last conversation he requested I add that he "never promised me perfect 17 year old legs," and he "did not cause my excess skin." I did not mean to imply he caused my excess skin, that was all my fault obviously for letting my self get so fat. He stands by his work as being "excellent" and that in his opinion it meets "all standards of care" . I never expected 17 year old legs, but I did expect more improvement than I got. He did such an awesome job on my lower body lift, it exceeds all expectations. It looks so good I was able to pierce my belly button and it looks good. My arm shape is gorgeous, I have thick scars, but again, that is how my body healed. the incisions were closed perfectly, edges perfectly approximated, sutured under the skin. Would I like improvement in the appearance of the scarring? of course I would and have not given up hope on that improvement. In all fairness - all readers will have to judge for themselves. If you really want to see pics, email me and I'll send them out. I do not have before tummy pics but you can see how good it looks after. warning, these pictures show my thighs and breasts in their full glory. Don't look if you will be offended.
****************************************************************
I have learned a big lesson from this. I went into it feeling just great, I have never had any problems with any surgery, and was sure this would be as picture perfect. I think my thighs should be redone. I don't know if I have the strength to go thru it again.
0 comments
7/14/2005
Apparently My PS has read my profile and is offended at what I have written. I want to clarify for his benefit. I did not mean to imply that he in any way caused my infection. The groin incision is in a warm moist area, warm moist areas are prone to infection. I HONESTLY never would have thought anyone could construe that to mean I thought the Dr. gave me an infection, especially when it cropped up a couple weeks post op and I had antibiotics for a week immediately post op. Infections can & do happen regardless of the best of surgeons. In my case I am quite sure it had nothing to do with the surgeon, It is just how my body reacted. I am removing all reference to his name as not to cause further offense. I publicly apologize to him if I have caused any undue embarrassment for my writings in my online journal. I also want to add that in our last conversation he requested I add that he "never promised me perfect 17 year old legs," and he "did not cause my excess skin." I did not mean to imply he caused my excess skin, that was all my fault obviously for letting my self get so fat. He stands by his work as being "excellent" and that in his opinion it meets "all standards of care" . I never expected 17 year old legs, but I did expect more improvement than I got. He did such an awesome job on my lower body lift, it exceeds all expectations. It looks so good I was able to pierce my belly button and it looks good. My arm shape is gorgeous, I have thick scars, but again, that is how my body healed. the incisions were closed perfectly, edges perfectly approximated, sutured under the skin. Would I like improvement in the appearance of the scarring? of course I would and have not given up hope on that improvement. In all fairness - all readers will have to judge for themselves. If you really want to see pics, email me and I'll send them out. I do not have before tummy pics but you can see how good it looks after. warning, these pictures show my thighs and breasts in their full glory. Don't look if you will be offended.
****************************************************************
I have learned a big lesson from this. I went into it feeling just great, I have never had any problems with any surgery, and was sure this would be as picture perfect. I think my thighs should be redone. I don't know if I have the strength to go thru it again.
dissapintment and depression after plastics
Jul 12, 2005
7/12/2005
It is weird looking back on my previous posts. Especially how excited I was immediately after my plastic surgery in April. So much had happened since then. My breast implants are also going bad fast. In the last month as they have dropped I have developed severe rippling of the implants. the implants are very visible and wrinkled. I spend a lot of time in tears. No amount of Wellbutrin or any other drug can make this feel better. I really don't know what else to do.
7/14/2005
I want to say that if my PS had responded in a kindly manner (rather than a CYA legal speech) when I initially expressed my dissatisfaction, If he had said OK, I can see you are upset, I will try to see what I can do to help you feel better about this, what I can do to improve your results is...
I would not be carrying the anger that I feel now.
Truly that was the response I expected after working with him for nearly a year. He always up to that point was one of the nicest, kindest, most compassionate doctors I have ever seen. Always seemed genuinely caring.
We had a phone conversation earlier today and he did say he might do the lipo around my knees and take off more skin - in the late fall. He said he is reluctant to do it because he thinks I cannot be pleased. He will not address the issue of my breasts until I come into his office and he examines them. (fair enough)
He said if he does my thigh stuff he will "never operate on me again." after that.
no kidding. like I would put myself thru any of this $hi# again once my thighs are better. No offense, but this has been HELL.
7/16/2005
I have been really seriously considering stopping posting and maybe even removing my profile. I need to express my feeling someplace, I depend on the support I get from my OH family. I also feel it is important to share my experiences with those following me as the ones before me shared theirs. I have learned so much and gotten so much from this group of people that I am grateful every day for this website and the ones reading it and sharing hope, support, encouragement.
I was a little surprised to hear that my ps was reading my OH profile and misinterpreting things I wrote. I tend to think the only people reading or interested are "us" giving and receiving support. Realistically, and taking accountability for my own actions, I KNOW it is a public forum, and anybody and everybody has the right to read it. However, it has made me take pause on whether sharing my information is a good idea, but I have gotten so much from here I really want to share and give back to the new people.. I'll just have to take the chance that an outside person who is there for reasons other than support will read my info. I know that I am not the only one going thru these experiences, and I hope that sharing mine will help someone else.
With all the changes I have been thru in the past 3 years I have done a lot of thinking about how and why I let my self get so fat. I had a really weird child hood. I grew up with 5 kids in my family, my Dad died when I was 4. My mom remarried a creep. (she was married several (5) times, we kids have 3 different fathers among us.) Long story short I ended up from the age of 12 living with various relatives, in foster care, and for one about 6 months period in a shelter. My eating disorder started during that time. Food was a comfort. I would often have huge binges primarily on candy, and at one point as a teenager was making my self vomit after a binge. Thank God I stopped that fairly quickly before it did any damage to me. But, the weight started going on by then, and while I was not obese it was the start down that road. The binges took away the other bad feelings and the fat became almost like a protective armor. I think going thru certain kinds of abuse as a kid you need to feel safe however you can. While I was moving around the only thing I wanted was my own family. I remember working as a waitress in a little mom & pop restaurant and another girl who worked there was in pharmacology school. I talked a lot about wanting to be married have kids. She said to me one day, you know, you have other options too. she was worried that I was limiting myself. I understood that, I knew college was in my future, I knew I was a great student, mostly straight A's with a few B's here and there, but career was second in my mind always. It was Family that was important. I think that is why I raced into pregnancy and marriage at such a young age. I was 17 when I got married, my husband was 19. My husband put me thru school because he wanted me to realize all of my dreams. (as said before I am lucky) It took me 7 years to get my associates degree as an RN, I did it while raising 3 small kids. My youngest was only a few months old when I started taking 1-2 classes at a time. I worked in post partum for several years and about the last 5 I have focused mainly on NICU, which I absolutely LOVE.
It took a lot to get to the point where I had the gastric bypass surgery and got off the weight. I am so grateful for it, but it does open up a vulnerable spot. The protective armor is gone and I have to cope with my feelings instead of eating them down.
One of the hardest things is trying to forgive my self for the abuse I have put my body thru. I am working on it daily.
7/28/2005
A big thank you to all who have emailed me with encouragement and support. Things are looking up. I can't say how much it means to me that people who only know me through obesity help are so supportive and caring. It really does make a difference.
My husband has been a pillar of strength through all this. We have been married 27 years, thru better and worse. But even after all this time he has surprised me with the support and empathy he has shown me. It would have been all too easy for him to tell me to get over it. I know I have not been easy to live with. I have not always appreciated what an awesome person he is, but the tremendous caring he has shown lately when I have been going thru a rocky patch is amazing and makes me love him even more than ever....
Pierced my BB a couple months ago. I was very creeped out on changing the ring, so I actually paid a guy $5 at a piercing shop to do it for me. Then I went by the piercing pagoda at the mall and saw BB rings that are too cute for words. Bought 2 and got up my nerve to change. I have a purple amethyst butterfly with a little pink flower dangling and a CZ one with 3 butterflies hanging down. I now am competent at changing my own BB rings!! My husband just laughs and laughs at me. My 25 y/o son told me I am too old and too fat to pierce my BB. I said I am a size 6/8 and by no definition am I fat. I may admit to old, but not fat. My oldest (26 y/o) told him to shut up because he might hurt my self esteem. My daughter(22) said she couldn't believe I did it after telling her years ago she couldn't. and getting mad at her when she did it anyways. KIDS!
It is weird looking back on my previous posts. Especially how excited I was immediately after my plastic surgery in April. So much had happened since then. My breast implants are also going bad fast. In the last month as they have dropped I have developed severe rippling of the implants. the implants are very visible and wrinkled. I spend a lot of time in tears. No amount of Wellbutrin or any other drug can make this feel better. I really don't know what else to do.
7/14/2005
I want to say that if my PS had responded in a kindly manner (rather than a CYA legal speech) when I initially expressed my dissatisfaction, If he had said OK, I can see you are upset, I will try to see what I can do to help you feel better about this, what I can do to improve your results is...
I would not be carrying the anger that I feel now.
Truly that was the response I expected after working with him for nearly a year. He always up to that point was one of the nicest, kindest, most compassionate doctors I have ever seen. Always seemed genuinely caring.
We had a phone conversation earlier today and he did say he might do the lipo around my knees and take off more skin - in the late fall. He said he is reluctant to do it because he thinks I cannot be pleased. He will not address the issue of my breasts until I come into his office and he examines them. (fair enough)
He said if he does my thigh stuff he will "never operate on me again." after that.
no kidding. like I would put myself thru any of this $hi# again once my thighs are better. No offense, but this has been HELL.
7/16/2005
I have been really seriously considering stopping posting and maybe even removing my profile. I need to express my feeling someplace, I depend on the support I get from my OH family. I also feel it is important to share my experiences with those following me as the ones before me shared theirs. I have learned so much and gotten so much from this group of people that I am grateful every day for this website and the ones reading it and sharing hope, support, encouragement.
I was a little surprised to hear that my ps was reading my OH profile and misinterpreting things I wrote. I tend to think the only people reading or interested are "us" giving and receiving support. Realistically, and taking accountability for my own actions, I KNOW it is a public forum, and anybody and everybody has the right to read it. However, it has made me take pause on whether sharing my information is a good idea, but I have gotten so much from here I really want to share and give back to the new people.. I'll just have to take the chance that an outside person who is there for reasons other than support will read my info. I know that I am not the only one going thru these experiences, and I hope that sharing mine will help someone else.
With all the changes I have been thru in the past 3 years I have done a lot of thinking about how and why I let my self get so fat. I had a really weird child hood. I grew up with 5 kids in my family, my Dad died when I was 4. My mom remarried a creep. (she was married several (5) times, we kids have 3 different fathers among us.) Long story short I ended up from the age of 12 living with various relatives, in foster care, and for one about 6 months period in a shelter. My eating disorder started during that time. Food was a comfort. I would often have huge binges primarily on candy, and at one point as a teenager was making my self vomit after a binge. Thank God I stopped that fairly quickly before it did any damage to me. But, the weight started going on by then, and while I was not obese it was the start down that road. The binges took away the other bad feelings and the fat became almost like a protective armor. I think going thru certain kinds of abuse as a kid you need to feel safe however you can. While I was moving around the only thing I wanted was my own family. I remember working as a waitress in a little mom & pop restaurant and another girl who worked there was in pharmacology school. I talked a lot about wanting to be married have kids. She said to me one day, you know, you have other options too. she was worried that I was limiting myself. I understood that, I knew college was in my future, I knew I was a great student, mostly straight A's with a few B's here and there, but career was second in my mind always. It was Family that was important. I think that is why I raced into pregnancy and marriage at such a young age. I was 17 when I got married, my husband was 19. My husband put me thru school because he wanted me to realize all of my dreams. (as said before I am lucky) It took me 7 years to get my associates degree as an RN, I did it while raising 3 small kids. My youngest was only a few months old when I started taking 1-2 classes at a time. I worked in post partum for several years and about the last 5 I have focused mainly on NICU, which I absolutely LOVE.
It took a lot to get to the point where I had the gastric bypass surgery and got off the weight. I am so grateful for it, but it does open up a vulnerable spot. The protective armor is gone and I have to cope with my feelings instead of eating them down.
One of the hardest things is trying to forgive my self for the abuse I have put my body thru. I am working on it daily.
7/28/2005
A big thank you to all who have emailed me with encouragement and support. Things are looking up. I can't say how much it means to me that people who only know me through obesity help are so supportive and caring. It really does make a difference.
My husband has been a pillar of strength through all this. We have been married 27 years, thru better and worse. But even after all this time he has surprised me with the support and empathy he has shown me. It would have been all too easy for him to tell me to get over it. I know I have not been easy to live with. I have not always appreciated what an awesome person he is, but the tremendous caring he has shown lately when I have been going thru a rocky patch is amazing and makes me love him even more than ever....
Pierced my BB a couple months ago. I was very creeped out on changing the ring, so I actually paid a guy $5 at a piercing shop to do it for me. Then I went by the piercing pagoda at the mall and saw BB rings that are too cute for words. Bought 2 and got up my nerve to change. I have a purple amethyst butterfly with a little pink flower dangling and a CZ one with 3 butterflies hanging down. I now am competent at changing my own BB rings!! My husband just laughs and laughs at me. My 25 y/o son told me I am too old and too fat to pierce my BB. I said I am a size 6/8 and by no definition am I fat. I may admit to old, but not fat. My oldest (26 y/o) told him to shut up because he might hurt my self esteem. My daughter(22) said she couldn't believe I did it after telling her years ago she couldn't. and getting mad at her when she did it anyways. KIDS!
the Plastic surgery experience (chapter 2) the saga continues..
May 29, 2005
5/29/2005 Still battling with post op depression. I think I am going to get a therapist. I did not expect this at all. It has been emotionally and physically very rough. My incisions are just now finally closed pretty well. I did get back to work finally this week.
My daughter was in a car accident a couple weeks ago and is ok now, but was in ICU overnight for a contusion on her spleen. I was scared to death. Thank God her injuries were actually minor. My grand daughter was with her and sustained only one small scratch and a small bruise both from the car seat belts. The car was totaled and is history. She is a young single mom who is already struggling financially. Her deductible for her car insurance was so high that there is no way she can use the insurance payment to pay off her car and get a new one. I gave her my car, a silver 2002 Escort ZX2, almost paid off. My husband has bought me a new car which did cheer me up quite a bit. It is a 2005 Mustang! The color is called "mineral grey metallic" I think it looks kind of taupe. very pretty. I really liked my ZX2, I bought and paid for it all on my own and was very proud of the fact.
6/5/05 saw a psychiatrist, she doubled my Wellbutrin, I made an appointment with a therapist and hopefully I will get on my way to better mental health. I intend to work on my issues with food, using it to cope emotionally, and finding better ways before I regain. I also need to work on my body image. I have been having severe depression since my last Plastic Surgery, the complications and poor ooutcome of the thigh lift, and it has been a rough ride, both physically and mentally. I am glad I am at least strong enough to take the actions necessary to get well. I have been thru so many changes over the last 2 1/2 years that it is a wonder I haven't had a total breakdown before now. Even GOOD changes are stressful. Getting thinner and healthier is a true blessing but it can open up a whole new set of issues to deal with.
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My daughter was in a car accident a couple weeks ago and is ok now, but was in ICU overnight for a contusion on her spleen. I was scared to death. Thank God her injuries were actually minor. My grand daughter was with her and sustained only one small scratch and a small bruise both from the car seat belts. The car was totaled and is history. She is a young single mom who is already struggling financially. Her deductible for her car insurance was so high that there is no way she can use the insurance payment to pay off her car and get a new one. I gave her my car, a silver 2002 Escort ZX2, almost paid off. My husband has bought me a new car which did cheer me up quite a bit. It is a 2005 Mustang! The color is called "mineral grey metallic" I think it looks kind of taupe. very pretty. I really liked my ZX2, I bought and paid for it all on my own and was very proud of the fact.
6/5/05 saw a psychiatrist, she doubled my Wellbutrin, I made an appointment with a therapist and hopefully I will get on my way to better mental health. I intend to work on my issues with food, using it to cope emotionally, and finding better ways before I regain. I also need to work on my body image. I have been having severe depression since my last Plastic Surgery, the complications and poor ooutcome of the thigh lift, and it has been a rough ride, both physically and mentally. I am glad I am at least strong enough to take the actions necessary to get well. I have been thru so many changes over the last 2 1/2 years that it is a wonder I haven't had a total breakdown before now. Even GOOD changes are stressful. Getting thinner and healthier is a true blessing but it can open up a whole new set of issues to deal with.
depressed
May 28, 2005
5/29/2005 Still battling with post op depression. I think I am going to get a therapist. I did not expect this at all. It has been emotionally and physically very rough. My incisions are just now finally closed pretty well. I did get back to work finally this week.
Infected thigh lift incision
May 16, 2005
5/16/2005 My thigh lift groin incision is still open and is clearly infected. My Dr. put me back on antibiotics. I was on them the first week, and when I finished I ended up with a yeast infection, had a reaction to the monistat and the whole area swelled up , red, inflamed, burning. My pcp gave me diflucan and a different RX cream and it all cleared up in about 4-5 days. So I was not thrilled to go back on antibiotics and risk another yeast infection but part of my incision swelled up like a golf ball, red, tender etc. the antibiotics are helping and I am taking acidophilus capsules and eating yogurt to help ward off the yeast. I was to be back at work this week. but am not allowed to return yet. My Plastic surgeon was in major denial that I actually had an infection. I really had to be VERY insistant, the incisions were open, red, draining, hot and swollen - every single symptom of infection in the book, but yet I had to be really insistant about the fact that I felt it was infected, and him denying it, and only giving me the anitbiotics because I was so insistant.
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excitement to dissapointment to depression
Apr 16, 2005
4/16/2005 A WHOLE NEW ME! I had my thighs lifted, breasts augmented, liposuction around my waist and lower back. and a tiny tuck/lift /lipo to the pubic area. It was a little puffy after the LBL. I am wrapped in ace bandages & abdominal binder from my armpits to my knees. It's a little hot & tight feeling. I am definitely very! very! sore! Thank God for Lortab, LOL. the girls are supposed to be a C, but with the swelling look more like a DD. I am not allowed to remove any of the wraps until I go to the DR's office Tuesday, they will do it. I feel like a little kid at Christmas, all the presents are under the tree & I'm not allowed to open them.
the gastric bypass was all about my health, this is to look as good as I feel. I have been working very hard to lose and maintain and I feel like I have earned it. (in more way than one, lots of extra hours at work to pay for it too.) I took out loans on my retirement that I will be paying off for the next 3 years.
I was to have had a traditional breast lift, but just as we were going into the OR my Dr came up with a new plan to do the breast work differently. he decided he could just remove a little strip of skin below my breasts and place the implants and stitch in the crease under my breasr to hold it all up. I agreed to it, but I think it is a little wierd for a Dr to change the surgery plan we discussed for months, literally minutes before the surgery with out really giving me a fair chance to think it over.
4/25/05
I had a thigh lift on 4/19 (9 days ago) so it is all fresh in my mind. Along with it I had liposuction on my lower back outer thighs and waist, an area of my LBL revised (lower front pubic area) & breast augmentation. I did it as an outpatient. I went into surgery at 10 am, 3+ hours surgery, was home around 5 pm. My husband was not home (he had an attack of diverticulitis and was hospitalized) so my 22 y/o daughter stayed with me, to keep an eye on me, bring me food, water, pillows etc. I slept in the recliner with pillows all around me, for several days, I simply could not face trying to lie down and worse, get back up. The first couple days sitting on the toilet was the worst, don't plan on being comfortable on any uncushioned surface for a while. When I had the ace wraps removed 3 days later my legs were so swollen I was HORRIFIED! to say the least at the swelling. My legs were twice their normal size. It has been rough physically and emotionally. the areas I had lipo'd look bigger than before also from all the swelling. I went into surgery weighing 132, came out at 145. (fluid retention) 9 days later, still 139. That is really hard for me even knowing it is fluid. every day I remind my self, it is swelling. Of course I am paranoid about my weight and work very hard to make sure I eat right and exercise. Now of course exercise is out and I have no appetite and have to force my self to eat. I usually don't do protein supps but am during this recovery. Inadequate protein will increase swelling and water retention and inhibit healing. Do you need someone with you? well, I had surgery on Saturday and by Monday was basically on my own all day. I survived with out anyone here, but I tend to be very self sufficient. On the good side it did force me to get up moving faster than if I had some one to "wait" on me and we all know how important getting moving after surgery is.
5/1/2005 the swelling from the plastics is going down. It has been rough, both physically and emotionally. I was not doing well on Lortab, and the pain was intense. The Lortab made me depressed and unable to sleep. Changed meds (to Darvocet) and I'm feeling a little better, at least I have gotten a couple decent nights of sleep. Tylenol was just not adequate, and as we all know Ibuprofen is out of the question. My thighs still look bad. the upper part of my thigh is tight, looks ok, the lower half looks like elephant skin, loose and wrinkly. I am seriously disappointed. I return to the Dr. 5/10 and I need to find out what can be done to improve them.
As far as the breast lift and implants, well, still some swelling there and the implants take a while to settle in and drop. Initially they looked just huge, but 34C fits perfectly and that is just what I asked for. My shirts and dresses still fit, but much smoother on top, not at all to tight or slutty looking, so I am happy with the size even though it looks a little bigger than I expected.
This round of plastic surgery has been much harder on me physically than I expected and with the disappointment in my outcome on my thighs, it has been emotionally hard. I went into this thinking there was no way I will ever again let my body be cut again for anything other than a life threatening illness and now I really believe my thighs will need to be redone. I feel like I have worked so hard for this and what I worked for has been taken from me. I calculated that for all I have paid out of my pocket on plastics it comes to over 700 hours of work.
I have always been an emotional eater and had been doing really well recently. But now Here I am now throwing a pity party for my self and eating cookies.
0 comments
the gastric bypass was all about my health, this is to look as good as I feel. I have been working very hard to lose and maintain and I feel like I have earned it. (in more way than one, lots of extra hours at work to pay for it too.) I took out loans on my retirement that I will be paying off for the next 3 years.
I was to have had a traditional breast lift, but just as we were going into the OR my Dr came up with a new plan to do the breast work differently. he decided he could just remove a little strip of skin below my breasts and place the implants and stitch in the crease under my breasr to hold it all up. I agreed to it, but I think it is a little wierd for a Dr to change the surgery plan we discussed for months, literally minutes before the surgery with out really giving me a fair chance to think it over.
4/25/05
I had a thigh lift on 4/19 (9 days ago) so it is all fresh in my mind. Along with it I had liposuction on my lower back outer thighs and waist, an area of my LBL revised (lower front pubic area) & breast augmentation. I did it as an outpatient. I went into surgery at 10 am, 3+ hours surgery, was home around 5 pm. My husband was not home (he had an attack of diverticulitis and was hospitalized) so my 22 y/o daughter stayed with me, to keep an eye on me, bring me food, water, pillows etc. I slept in the recliner with pillows all around me, for several days, I simply could not face trying to lie down and worse, get back up. The first couple days sitting on the toilet was the worst, don't plan on being comfortable on any uncushioned surface for a while. When I had the ace wraps removed 3 days later my legs were so swollen I was HORRIFIED! to say the least at the swelling. My legs were twice their normal size. It has been rough physically and emotionally. the areas I had lipo'd look bigger than before also from all the swelling. I went into surgery weighing 132, came out at 145. (fluid retention) 9 days later, still 139. That is really hard for me even knowing it is fluid. every day I remind my self, it is swelling. Of course I am paranoid about my weight and work very hard to make sure I eat right and exercise. Now of course exercise is out and I have no appetite and have to force my self to eat. I usually don't do protein supps but am during this recovery. Inadequate protein will increase swelling and water retention and inhibit healing. Do you need someone with you? well, I had surgery on Saturday and by Monday was basically on my own all day. I survived with out anyone here, but I tend to be very self sufficient. On the good side it did force me to get up moving faster than if I had some one to "wait" on me and we all know how important getting moving after surgery is.
5/1/2005 the swelling from the plastics is going down. It has been rough, both physically and emotionally. I was not doing well on Lortab, and the pain was intense. The Lortab made me depressed and unable to sleep. Changed meds (to Darvocet) and I'm feeling a little better, at least I have gotten a couple decent nights of sleep. Tylenol was just not adequate, and as we all know Ibuprofen is out of the question. My thighs still look bad. the upper part of my thigh is tight, looks ok, the lower half looks like elephant skin, loose and wrinkly. I am seriously disappointed. I return to the Dr. 5/10 and I need to find out what can be done to improve them.
As far as the breast lift and implants, well, still some swelling there and the implants take a while to settle in and drop. Initially they looked just huge, but 34C fits perfectly and that is just what I asked for. My shirts and dresses still fit, but much smoother on top, not at all to tight or slutty looking, so I am happy with the size even though it looks a little bigger than I expected.
This round of plastic surgery has been much harder on me physically than I expected and with the disappointment in my outcome on my thighs, it has been emotionally hard. I went into this thinking there was no way I will ever again let my body be cut again for anything other than a life threatening illness and now I really believe my thighs will need to be redone. I feel like I have worked so hard for this and what I worked for has been taken from me. I calculated that for all I have paid out of my pocket on plastics it comes to over 700 hours of work.
I have always been an emotional eater and had been doing really well recently. But now Here I am now throwing a pity party for my self and eating cookies.
arm scarring/scheduled thigh lift and BA
Feb 16, 2005
02/16/2005
I saw my plastic surgeon today. I am concerned about the heavy scarring from my brachioplasty. He says I am healing very normally. If the scars do not lighten, I will have steroid injections into the scars in a couple months. I knew there would be big scars, elbow to armpit, but these are very ropey looking, raised and thick. My LBL scar that I had the same day is flat and getting lighter every day. In a couple months it will barely be visible. It is strange how the body heals. I know he closed it all nicely with tiny stitches all under the skin to minimize scarring.
I also scheduled my thigh lift and breast lift and implants. I am also having a little lipo on my lower back where I have some stubborn fat pockets that will not go away. I am both excited and near having a panic/anxiety attack over it all. April 16 will be the BIG day.
I saw my plastic surgeon today. I am concerned about the heavy scarring from my brachioplasty. He says I am healing very normally. If the scars do not lighten, I will have steroid injections into the scars in a couple months. I knew there would be big scars, elbow to armpit, but these are very ropey looking, raised and thick. My LBL scar that I had the same day is flat and getting lighter every day. In a couple months it will barely be visible. It is strange how the body heals. I know he closed it all nicely with tiny stitches all under the skin to minimize scarring.
I also scheduled my thigh lift and breast lift and implants. I am also having a little lipo on my lower back where I have some stubborn fat pockets that will not go away. I am both excited and near having a panic/anxiety attack over it all. April 16 will be the BIG day.
Decenber updates
Dec 22, 2004
12/22/2004
this is so funny. I was talking to someone about how I had terrible Achilles tendonitis a few years ago and that it had gone away after I lost some weight. She said, "I can't imagine you needing to lose weight, you are so TINY" I laughed, and just left it at "I was not this size then." It felt good to hear I was TINY! after being so big just 2 years ago.
I have been under a great deal of stress lately, family stuff. I am struggling with stress eating once again. I had been really good until recently, but have caught myself eating to cope, and having a hard time stopping myself from doing it. It is almost like a mindless reflex. My weight is at 128, I am pms-ing and always go up about 5 pounds at this time of the month too, but it is making me crazy because I KNOW I am not always eating what I should. My pouch limits my intake but it is a little scary to find yourself eating something you shouldn't, when you are not hungry and realizing it is a stress reaction. As so many others have said, "they fix your stomach, not your head." I do know this, I will likely struggle with food issues for the rest of my life. I just hope I can win out and maintain. I envy those who have been able to make food a strictly utilitarian issue, i.e. only eating as fuel for the body, not relating it to anything emotional.
this is so funny. I was talking to someone about how I had terrible Achilles tendonitis a few years ago and that it had gone away after I lost some weight. She said, "I can't imagine you needing to lose weight, you are so TINY" I laughed, and just left it at "I was not this size then." It felt good to hear I was TINY! after being so big just 2 years ago.
I have been under a great deal of stress lately, family stuff. I am struggling with stress eating once again. I had been really good until recently, but have caught myself eating to cope, and having a hard time stopping myself from doing it. It is almost like a mindless reflex. My weight is at 128, I am pms-ing and always go up about 5 pounds at this time of the month too, but it is making me crazy because I KNOW I am not always eating what I should. My pouch limits my intake but it is a little scary to find yourself eating something you shouldn't, when you are not hungry and realizing it is a stress reaction. As so many others have said, "they fix your stomach, not your head." I do know this, I will likely struggle with food issues for the rest of my life. I just hope I can win out and maintain. I envy those who have been able to make food a strictly utilitarian issue, i.e. only eating as fuel for the body, not relating it to anything emotional.
About Me
Lake In The Hills, IL
Location
27.3
BMI
Surgery
09/25/2002
Surgery Date
Jun 08, 2002
Member Since
Before & After
rollover to see after photo
9/25/2002
260lbs
9/25/2003
140lbs
