6 days until surgery!

Dec 22, 2011

At lunch today i freaked out when i heard that sad christmas song where the boy just wants to buy his dying mother some christmas shoes but doesnt have enough money. i was in the parking lot of value village about to go try to find a new charger for my laptop. i was crying so hard it was ridiculous! i text my parents and told them i was so scared there would be complications and kalani (my 5 year old) would be without a mom. everyone in value village was looking at me so funny because the tears were just pouring out of my eyes. I just feel like im supposed to be strong all the time. when i break down i really go down hard. i hope to keep it together for awhile longer. i am so close. less than a week.

Anyways, I didnt find the charger at Value Village. but i did find the coolest baby silverware set! i am so excited about it. it comes in a little wood tray with spoon, forks, knife and desert spoons :) now i just need to find baby plates and bowls that dont make me look like a baby lol ;)

After i stopped crying i called my nutritionist. She assured me that the surgery will not get cancelled, it is good that i started a week early and for the next 5.5 days i need to be really good at making sure i am under 40 carbs. i am tempted to do a liquid only diet friday, sunday, monday and tuesday to make sure my liver shrinks quickly and enough so my surgeon isnt mad at me. i am so disappointed that i gave in and ate banned foods. :( i will hopefully find a charger that will not cost me an arm and a leg so i can keep blogging on my break otherwise tomorrow will be my last entry for 6 weeks :( i really hope i find one!

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