5 --- one hand--- 5 days until surgery! OMFG

Dec 23, 2011

thats right... 5 days until surgery! :) i can count the days on 1 hand!!! wooohoooo

What comes along with the excitement of surgery, the nervousness of having incisions made in your belly, concern about complications? Stress, anxiety, negative attitudes, grumpy, short tempers. Thats me right now. there is so much to do in so little time.

I bought a charger at goodwill that appeared to be a good fit but when i got home it did not charge the laptop, it did give it power to work while on the charger. i just ordered a laptop charger online that should be here shortly after i have surgery :) 

Things i still need to do:
~ wrap christmas presents
~ Do laundry
~ pack my sons overnight bag
~ pack my own hospital bag
~ clean, clean, clean! vacuum, sweep, mop, dust, wash windows, change sheets, clean car (inside and out).
~ Put christmas decorations away
~ Bake Santa Cookies
~ buy brothers christmas and birthday present
~ buy best friends christmas present
~ get stocking stuffers for my lil man

Thats quite a list... lists make me stressed but im even more stressed if i dont write things down.

I went a little crazy at goodwill last night. i got supplies to learn to knit, a cool looking book (to the already large list), and needle point supplies. I am not going to run out of things to do while i am stuck in bed. I also got a cool bed tray, its wicker and pretty tall, so im going to set it next to my bed and keep my eating list, books, craft supplies and laptop on it :) Its going to be wonderful.

I am very positive about this whole thing. I am also very nervous and scared. But overall i have wanted to have wls for over 10 years. i was 13 when i first heard of the lapband (that was 12 years ago). Now my dream is finally coming true. I am very excited to have the opportunity to be a normal size. not be trapped or a victim to my weight. I have never, and i mean NEVER been skinny or a normal weight. i was nearly 200 pounds when i was in 5th grade. Yes, i was active and happy and had friends but i knew i didnt look like other kids. i got made fun of but i also had an amazing family and friends who didnt care about my weight so in that way i lucked out. It is going to redefine my life. i can choose my style, instead of only being able to wear whatever fits. i will be able to shop and goodwill and forever 21. i will not have to worry about the seat size or crowds. i will be able to run around with my son and squeeze through the crowds when he runs off. i am very excited about that. i WANT to remember every NSV, forget to complain about the pain and the difficulty and remember to think of something positive every day! lets see if i can do it. I will be back on tuesday with a holiday update and only 1 day left until surgery. not a full day, but a day i have to live until i lay down and get put to sleep, cut open and wake up in pain, walk in pain and drink in pain, but still smile through all the pain and drugs because i did it! i have a forever tool that will help me live a forever happy, fulfilling life :) :) :) 

Merry Christmas!!!!!!!


Addendum: I just read this on the failed wls forum

No form of weight loss surgery is magic.

YOU have to change your lifestyle, PERMANENTLY. 

YOU have to choose to eat a healthy diet.

YOU have to choose to exercise moderately, on a regular basis.

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