Frusrated

As lightweights did people give you a hard time for having surgery. Even the night of my surgery I had nurses asking me why I had done this.  It is so frustrating and one of the reasons I haven't told people about my surgery. with a bmi of 40.2 on day of surgery I am very obese. 

People are so dang clueless, even the medical community. Hang in there, girl. We got your back. You don't have to tell anybody anything you don't want to.

--gina

I've not told anyone other than DH and my parents as why open yourself up to other people's judgement?

I know how you feel.  I have been working out for years and am 5'2" 198or so before surgery.  I don't look huge but I have strong family history of heart disease and I have it myself.  After my cardiologist said the best thing I could do to live longer was lose the weight I made the decision.  Also a major factor was my brother (1 year older) passing away last june at the age of 52, my sister having to have 3 stents in her heart this year and my other brother died at the age of 39 after his first heart attack at 26.  So, they may have said that this is way to drastic for me but hey I have tried most of my life and not been successful.  I am very glad I had the surgery 2 1/2 weeks ago.  I am down over 20lbs (including 2 week pre op diet) and feeling a lot better.  It's good to know I will (God Willing) be around a while for my kids and hopefully see my grand kids someday.  Hang in there and listen to your heart. 

Thanks everyone. I know I made my decision to have surgery so I could be a healthier person. I just get so irritated with people. since the only people who know what surgery I had is my hubby and kids. Getting the third degree and questions from nursing staff during different testing pre op and post op has just irritated me. Regardless of their thoughts this is not the easy way out. This process is difficult and life changing.

"this is a decision my dr and I made very seriously considering my long term health"  usually shuts them up.

Same thing happened to me. If they seemed kind about it, I let it go. But those that seemed ill-spirited, I'd look at them meanly and say, "REALLY?" That seemed to help :)

Yea, I feel your frustration.  I made the decision early out to tell anyone & everyone really to take the stigma out of who WLS is for, not just those who hit the 300+lb mark and that obesity is a pressing issue for most people.  Well, at the pre surgical clinic, I had a nurse look me up and down and say you are having WLS?  Why?  When I started my BMI was at 40.2, now with working on my weight management and practicing the lifestyle it is 36, but I know I need this tool to help me wrestle my BMI down to at least overweight and keep it there. 

My VSG is scheduled for next week, and of course  I'm nervous, and now many other people are looking at me as doing this for purely vanity reasons, so in a way I do regret opening by big mouth, but on the other hand, I will 'take one for the team', it if means some other MO person out there might start thinking about medical intervention.  Also, it is good to get out there and talk about it so perhaps someone who is simply just overweight will stop and turn that horse around while it is still manageable. 

So *****s) up gurl and keep on your road to healty recovery.

I was right where you are in January and I've told a few people and some have been supportive and some not so much.  I had so many health issues and I saw my fate if I didn't do something drastic.  I've gained and lost the weight a million times only to gain it back and more.   I do feel guilty when some of my neighbors and friends ask me how I'm dropping the pounds and I explain my low carb, high protein, limited portion diet along with exercise.  I think I would tell them the complete truth if they had more than a few pounds to lose.    Keep positive, and be aware that people will continue to comment about those they know who have had failed WLS and that if you were really committed you would have done it on your own.  My own mother who is at least 125lbs over weight said when I decide to lose weight I just do it...well in the 45 years I've known her she was thin for about two years and that was when I was 23.  At 74 she has COPD, heart arithimia, diabetes, survivor of vocal cord cancer (a result of acid reflux), oxygen depended sleep apnea and has trouble with her mobility.    There are many ways that I want to be like my mother but I don't want her health issues and my RNY is just a tool to help prevent them.  Keep your chin up, some days are harder than others but the ladies on this site have been doing this for a lot longer than we have and they have a lot of great advice.  If I can be of help, just let me know.

Thank you.  This site has been wonderful.