Three Plus Months

Sep 13, 2009

So I wrote a wonderful and articulate post right around my 3 month mark, and OH ate it.  So I'll see how I do about a week and a half later at being articulate.

Things are moving along pretty well I guess.  I had my 3 months surgeon visit, did the labwork, etc.  No call from the nurse about labs, so that's good news.  When I go for my next NUT appt. I will make sure to get exactly what the levels were for my own curiousity.  Dr. Trieu said I'm doing well, I've lost right around 50% of my excess weight since starting the 2 weeks on liquid diet.  Pounds are coming off relatively slow, but I've been experimenting with food a little bit (bad me - more on that later).  I also haven't been very good about going to the gym - but I did go today and plan to go tomorrow!  I started a Muay Thai kickboxing class that is totally kicking my ass, but it's a lot of fun (if you want to call it fun).

So I've been pushing my food limits to see what "works" and what doesn't.  I seem to have a pretty high sugar tolerance and I don't think I truly dump.  Although I did get the cold sweats after some fudge at the Litchfield Fair today.  Fudge!  Can you believe I tried to eat fudge!?!?  What was I thinking?  It tasted good, but it's such a slippery slope.  I've been doing pretty good though, have started with a little more carbs, like Arnold Multi Grain Sandwich Thins.  I love those tasty little things!  I have a 1/2 one with ham and Laughing Cow cheese and that's my sandwich.  Will be trying it with tuna this week as well.  I also found some stuffed chicken breasts at Wally World that are pretty good, a half one has about 16g of protein.  I do tend to graze a lot in the evening, like I don't eat much all day unless I force myself, but at night I just can't stop!  I try to make good choices, but sometimes, ugh.  I don't know if it's a self-sabotage thing, or a just figuring out the boundaries thing.  I need to figure that out fast though before I make real problems for myself down the road.

I also haven't been going to the gym like I said.  Just haven't been able to push myself, and I was pretty religious about it before.  I think the kickboxing has something to do with it.  The first few weeks I'd be so sore for days afterwards that I wouldn't want to work out at all.  Then it would be "well I have kickboxing in a couple of days so I don't need to work out".  Yeah I'm kicking that mindset to the curb now!  I went today and even went on the evil StairMaster for 10 minutes - not long, but I will work my time up and conquer the evil machine.

Clothes are so much fun to buy!  I'm still in mostly 12s and some 14s.  I even bought a size Medium shirt at Old Navy the other day!!!  I'm discovering a love for Old Navy, they have some really cute clothes and are priced quite reasonably.  Kohl's and Target are my other faves.  My friend wants me to go to American Eagle and try on some jeans there, but I don't know if I'm quite ready for that...lol. 

I've had some great wows also.  When you see people and they do a double-take.  One girl I used to work with didn't recognize me at first - then she was like "you look goooood".  Even the girl at the hospital when I went for my lab work was surprised I'd had bypass and thought I looked like a regular average weight person.  That made me feel good - but I still have 40ish pounds to go.

I'm discovering this is truly an emotional journey as much as it's a physical journey, if not even more so.  I think it's time for me to buckle down and start working on my brain and emotions, because the smaller I get, the more they seem to act up. 

If anyone read this whole rambling blog, bless you for your patience...  :)

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