hatda
LAWD!
Mar 14, 2009
Things have been going well from a weight perspective. I"m down to my lowest weight of 167.4 today. My lowest before that was 168 a loooooong while back...so I"m real pleased. I haven't been to they gym in weeks. First I was dealing with a death in my family, then a bad cold, then I needed a touchup so i wasn't trying to go sweat my hair out and look like boo boo the fool
(yep, I"m a loser for that one).Anyway, I"ll be back on course beginning Monday. i am supposed to run a 5K on next Saturday, but Im kinda scared because I haven't been in the gym......but I should do OK.,,,,,we'll see if I do it or not.
I"ve actually been following the NUT's direction and eating only 3 meals a day....mostly eggs, cheese, lean meat and stuff like that. sometimes I've thrown in a snack of something...but that's been really rare. I've noticed that I'm not really hungry at all.....could it be that I'm starting to identify REAL hunger vs. head hunger? hmmmmmm ..so things are going well on that front too. Sweets is still a great temptation..but Thank the Lord for dumping in my case...I haven't had a bad episode lately, but just being nauceous is enough of an issue where I don't overly induldge. I'm also addicated to decaf coffee. I NEVER drank coffee before surgery but I find comfort in the sf hazelnut creamer...it's kinda like a sweets fix, so I have a cup or 2 a day..
Be blessed friends. Know that the revival lives in US. We are the REVIVAL and must spread HIS word and take back dominion for HIS Kingdom.
CALL OUT HIS NAME.......J E S U S (do you know that song? OMGosh....It's all up in my spirit right now).
New Pics & visit with the NUT
Mar 01, 2009
I visited the NUT on Friday and she gave me some really good direction.
Kaiser is really strict as far as 3 meals a day and no snacks in between. This is really different from what I was directed to do with my surgeon from UCSF. As well, they don't focus on counting calories. She directed me to journal my food still and to stick to a lean protein meal plan...but that's it.
I"m gonna try and see what happens. I have to get over this 5 month plateau. My time is running out as far as the window...so gonna try it.
Hopefully this time next week I can log a good drop in weight.
I slipped up....down
Feb 15, 2009
You know how on shows like Americas Funniest Home Video they show someone with their pants falling down or something stupid like that and you say "that is so made up and not believeable?"
Well, in church today I wore a black skirt that was a bit sheary, so I decided to wear a slip underneath so you couldn't see through it (I very rarely wear slips). I'm standing around before church starts chatting it up and a lady walks past and speaks and quickly does a double take and runs back to me and very quietly asks "IS THAT YOUR SLIP"? I look down cause she was looking down and really didn't think about it and said no, those are my tights (I have no idea why I had that response 
). Anyway, I quickly did a double take and realized my slip had fallen down dang near around my ankles and I never felt it...maybe because i had on tights; which I very rarely wear too.
O M G.......... How embarrasing. I quickly ran into an office and took it off.
After feeling like everyone probably saw it and wanting to just crawl under a rock cause I felt like a freaking loser I realized......I AM A FREAKING L O S E R....I've lost so much weight that my slip SLIPS from around my hips..
That quickly changed from something that was embarrasing to something to rejoice over.
HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY.......
Didn't meet my Valentines Challenge Goal
Feb 13, 2009
I am thankful that I didn't gain above that, but a bit disappointed that I didn't surpass it and finally hit a weight goal. I"m so close yet far away.
It's been a trying week as I lost one of my closest cousins and it's just been a rough week. I"m actually surprised I didn't lose any more weight than I did because I haven't really had an appetite to eat...but oh well.
I am still eating pretty good and doing well at the gym. I"m back to jogging on the treadmill and really WOW'd myself that I can actually jog an entire 5K. My times are still around the 39-40 minute mark; but that's good; especially since I had really stopped jogging and was more on the elipticals.
There are about 3-4 5K's that I see for this spring that I will challenge myself to run and do under my time from last year.
I go to the NUT on 2/27, so excited as to how I can change things up and maybe see it via the scales...but if not...I won't allow that to stop me.
have a great Valentine's Day wit yo hunny and I'll holla back soon.
+3.2 lbs. Enough said
Feb 07, 2009
...I do have a NUT appointment on 2/27, so looking forward to some guidance cause I thought I was on point this week. Sigh...such is life.
1 YEAR SURGIVERSARY TODAY
Jan 31, 2009
This time last year I was in recovery. Miserable, dry mouth, chapped lips, in and out of conscieness, in pain on the left side, confused as heck with all the drugs I was on. I remember the nurses saying i continued to stop breathing in recovery because of my sleep apnea. I remember my beautiful husband, mom and kids coming to say good night after being at the hospital for over 13 hours; waiting for me to wake the heck up.
I am more than 64lbs lighter than i was this day last year. Many, Many inches smaller and think I"m so much cuter lol. I went from sizes 16 & 18 to now a 6 & 8. I"ve gone from knees hurting after walking my flight of stairs at the house to running up with no problem. Went from dispising the gym to looking forward to it.
I"ve had some ups and downs in this last year. The scale definately became the enemy because of my plateaus and stalls. It found a way to dictate whether I was going to be happy or sad on any given day. I"ve learned to only 1/2 way pay attention to it. I went from weighing myself several times a day to only once a week.
One change that has surprised me is the fact that i ACTUALLY like veggies and look forward to zucchini, snow peas and especially salad with green, red and yellow peppers. This was something that was NOT on the menu a year ago. What a waste I"d think...now I look forward to it. I"ve also learned portion control, eating slowly and the all famous....WATER all day long. GEtting all my protein in is still a challenge, but I am more conscience of everthing I eat, even if it's something that is not so good for me.
I love sitting with my legs crossed, wearing smaller clothes (things that I would have never worn in the past), having so much energy at the gym and not being able to eat alot. I LOVE those things. I love having more energy in the bedroom and the new found STUNTS (lol....TMI). I love the fact that I get the dumping syndrome. Without it, who knows if I"d be able to avoid some of the sweets since I am a sweet addict. I still eat them from time to time...but I pay for it with not feeling very good afterwards.
I haven't had a soda in more than a year,,,there are times I've craved my pepsi/coke, but I know I can't do it..I remember how miserable I used to feel after downing a can of coke or pepsi...I'd feel so bloated....I never want to feel like that.
I love the fact that I can wear brands like ECKO and other tiny bopper clothes. I LOVE going into my daughters closet and being able to fit a few of her things (not any more cause she's really small and cutsie). I could go on and on.
A few of my goals was to be able to cross my leg, comfortably and confidently wear Victoria Secret thongs, have smaller boobs...all things things have been achieved.
there is so much more I have to do by way of my body (weight per the scale as well as toning)....but I"m looking forward to achieving those things that I set out to do.
Oh yea, I think one of the biggest things is the way my husband looks at me now....I remember that 'look' back in the day, when I was 18-19 years old. I get 'THE LOOK' again 
...and I love it....
This is really been a good year. Despite me moping at times, complaining at times and feeling disappointment in myself at times....it's been a great year. I look forward to the next 12 months. I look forward to the day I can blog that I met my weight goal. I look forward to the day I can blog about meeting my fitness goal (I really want to RUN the Bay to Breakers in San Francisco), I look forward to wearing a size 4 comfortably (that's my ultimate size goal)....I have alot of things I want to do...but most of all, looking forward to continuing on the road of good health.
THANK YOU SO MUCH OH FAMILY for being there to kick my butt, offer encouragement and just give me honest advice and to remind me where I was when I started this journey.
TO ALL OF YOU! Here's to meeting goals in 2009.
Loves ya much. Harriet
One week to go
Jan 24, 2009
This has been an extremely good week.
I"ve gotten alot of encouragement from some of my OH family. I really appreicate that. Who knew that 'taking the easy way out" was so hard. YEAH RIGHT. The easy way. If 'they' only knew how difficult this journey really is
...not only is it a journey, but I"ve found that changing your way of life is soooo difficult when it comes to addictions. I am addicted to candy and sweets and those things control my every thought at times. How can I get it, eat it without anyone seeing me. I still think like that some times....but I"ve been so concious this week of what's going into my mouth. Not that I haven't eaten some things that I shouldn't have.....being able to just be honest and stop fooling myself.I lost about 4.8 lbs this week
; so back down to 171.0. I just have to continue doing what I did last week. Tracking ALL my food intake, drinking hella water (yep, I made it to over 64oz), and keeping my mind so busy that the thought of candy is quickly overtaken by whatever i'm busy with......mostly work.Another thing I"ve really taken into account is that just because it's 8am doesn't mean you have to have 'breakfast'. This morning I ate 2 sausage and a nice salad....SOOOOOO good. I"m kinda tryiung to mix it up so my body doesn't know what's coming next....we'll see how that goes.
Well family, have a good week and be conscious of what's going into your mouth. I"ll be hollering at cha on my 1 year surgiversary day next Saturday.
keeping it REAL'er'
Jan 18, 2009
from the last time I updated it last week....Oh well, gotta face reality right....THE TRUTH HURTS.
Have committed to carry my food journal in my purse this week so that anything I put in my mouth , I can quickly register and not ignore it.
On a good note, did 1.5 miles on the gazalle this morning. Off to a good start.
Heading to church soon.Keeping it real! @%^&
Jan 17, 2009
I gained 2 pounds...OVER AND ABOVE my normal. For the past 4 months I have been between 168-173. For whatever reason I can't go below nor above that weight....until now.
I weighed in today at 175.8 today
WHAT????? How can I be going backward? How? Well I know the answer to that..... I am NOT doing what I'm supposed to do. I really don't eat alot of food, but I am a candy junkie. I eat suckers all day long...sometimes until I get nauseous....I also eat other things here and there that is not good and can cause me to go BACK to where the heck I came from; which I vowed to myself I would never let happen.This is the most devistated I've been since I had surgery. WHY? because I feel like I can really gain the weight back if I"m not careful. Here I am about 2 weeks shy of my 1 year surgiversary and I've GAINED. This is ridiculous. This is not what I signed up for. THis is jsut not cool. I feel so ashamed and disappoined in myself. I look back on the past few weeks and realize that I've been lying to myself. A little bit of this here and a little snag of that there and I justify it with "it's only a little bit"; but that little bit adds up to alot a bit and I find it harder to avoid things sometimes. I"ve set myself up for failure if I continue on this path. Here I am, joining the Valentines Day challenge, telling myself that I can still be at 160 by then....but now I"d have to lose 15 lbs in 1 month...that's difficult since I haven't lost in over 4 months.
Where do I go from here? How do I recover? I know...I'm probably overacting; but this is how devestated I am today. I feel like a failure right now. I have no excuses...no witty comment that'll make me feel better....
D E E E E E P P P P B R E A T H H H H H H .........
Now that I'm done with the "WOE IS ME" pitty party, it's time to pull it together and get my @zz into gear and do what I know I can do.
On a happier note: I went to the gym this morning and did 45 mins cardio, weights and abs....
signed,
STRUGGLING IN CALI.....but I can do it and so can you! So, keep encouraging me and/or cussing me out...whateva you feel appropriate! LOL...I'm feeling better as I type
Hey y'all
Jan 11, 2009
Happy Sunday!
Well. the stall wins again as I"m the exact same as I was the last time I weighed. That's OK. Another day, another opportunity to lose right? YES!
I've added additional cardio daily to see the results when I weigh in on Saturday. I"m looking for a nice loss. Something under 168; which has been my lowest weight.
Went to my new WL surgeon. He is awesome. I really like him. HE reviewed my CT Scan with me and said the reason for the pain is scar tissue around the nerves at the incision sites. REally no 'cure'....He said if I started Yoga or Pilates or just did some stretching really good that this would streatch out the tissue and I'd notice the pain subside. THe pain is not so bad; I was just worried that it was something more. Either way, I'm so glad I met this doctor...he was very nice yet blunt. He told me to step up the exercising and ensure I"mn getting in my protein and back off snacking. He said my body is definately not ready to quit losing...I just have to do something to kick start the loss again.
For me, it's difficult to just eat 3 x's a day as Kaiser pushes you to do. I can't get enough in in a meal to sustain me until the next meal because I get full so fast (yes, i chew, chew, chew slowly, so i'm not eating to fast...my little pouchie just can't hold alot of food), so I have to have a snack. My thing is; I have to ensure the snack I get is healhy and not wasted calories. I know that snacking can lead to more snacking which will lead to more snaking and BAM....uncontrolled weight gain....but I just have to structure myself and limit myself to healthy choices. PERIOD.
I'll update cha soon.
P E A C E
