I'm in the Century Club!!!!
Oct 25, 2009
My weight loss had slowed so much, I thought I was never going to get here. I'm just 8 1/2 months out, and I've only lost 6 pounds since August 24th, and was a little bit frustrated. I know that it's not all about the scale, but I wanted to reach that 100 pound loss. For some reason it was important to me to be able to say "100 pounds" when someone asks me how much I've lost. Now I just need someone with Photoshop to make me one of those cool cards
Getting through the stall wasn't a huge deal for me, because I'm basically so happy at the weight I am now. I think I've got 33 pounds left to get to my goal, and I know the closer I am to my goal, the slower it's going to come off. At least I get to wear my clothes for a little longer now! LOL
I can hardly believe that I've lost 100 pounds! That number seems unreal to me. When I think of where I was in February, and where I am now, it's just hard to process. I couldn't have even imagined what life would be like after losing this amount of weight. I haven't been this weight for probably 18-20 years.
It's not even just the weight. I've made so many new friends through OH, and being an OH group support leader has been awesome. The things I've learned, the way my life has changed, and the way I've been able to help others who are starting on this journey, has made my life so much fuller.
I am disabled (I know, you can't tell it by looking at me), but we all have challenges that make our lives difficult. Not having all that extra weight to lug around all day, has made a big difference in how I feel day-to-day. When I think about attempting to lift 5 twenty pound bags of potatoes, there's no way I could ever do it, but that's what I was dragging around with me every day!
From now on, any more weight I lose will be gravy. I'm not one who's obsessed about getting to a particular goal weight. I feel so good now, that I'm just going to focus on keeping on track with my eating to stay healthy, keep educating myself about my surgery, and keep working on our support group. It keeps me accountable, and there's nothing better than being able to sit and talk with others who have been through what I have, (or who will be). I don't want to fall off the wagon (and it can be done!) Now that I've reached that 100 pound goal, I'm just focusing on keeping it off.
I'm so excited!!!
Sep 13, 2009
Well not only was I still standing on Friday, but I went to get my hair cut, returned some clothing to a store, went to scope out a new location for our WLS support group to meet, AND went clothes shopping at Reitmans. For me, that would have been impossible a year ago. I was excited beyond belief!
Another really exciting thing for me was when I went to Reitman's clothes shopping. I had always shopped in the plus size section on the left hand side of the store. Well Friday was the first time in 20 years that I've been able to shop on the RIGHT hand side of the store, in the regular size section! Of course everything I picked up was either a size 15 or XL. I wasn't sure what size I would wear, so I took the largest sizes they had. I had to get the sales lady to take the stuff back and get me smaller sizes!!!! I couldn't believe it. I'm a size 13 or a regular large now. This is unbelievable to me. I'm in a bit of shock I think, because it still doesn't seem real. I can't believe that I've lost 94 pounds in 7 months, and how much that 94 pounds has changed my life.
I'm making an appointment with a personal trainer at the Y for next week sometime. She's the girl who led the Salsa class, and I think she would really motivate me. In the meantime, I'm going to walk with my friend at the dog park again tomorrow, and then we're having dinner together, and doing a yoga session at her place. I'm also going to go back and do the salsa class on Thursday.
I feel so hopefull for the future now. Knowing that I can exercize and not be in terrible pain is so motivating for me. It was just a dream before, but now I can actually do it. I mean, I'm not going to be competing in any Iron Man competitions anytime soon, but just being able to dance, and walk, and get stronger, is amazing. If for no other reason, I'm so glad I had my surgery. I couldn't have ever imagined being this far, in such a short time. I'm so excited about everything!
P.S. My daughter bought that adorable little bungalow on Friday too!!!!
Things are a little better now!
Sep 10, 2009
I'm doing pretty well now. The past couple of weeks had been a little rough, but I was out walking with my friend at the dog park yesterday, and it was a beautiful, hot, sunny day. This dog park is just miles of paths through the woods. It's so peaceful, you'd think you were out in the middle of nowhere, in the forest somewhere, but it's actually right in Oshawa (pop. 152,000). We walked through the trees for about an hour, so it was a great way for me to get some exercise, laugh at the dogs having so much fun, and get to spend some time with my friend. We're going for Salsa lessons tonight at the Y, and then hopefully I'll go walking at the dog park with her again on Friday.
I'm still waiting to see the surgeon next week about having my hernia repaired. I've been on a stall for several weeks now, but it's the first one I've had in 7 months, so I'm not all wound up about it. I'm loving that I'm now into a size 14!!! I'm actually in a "normal" size. Just an average size woman now. What an amazing feeling!
I'm very excited now that I'm into a size 14 jeans! I bought a bunch of things at Walmart, because I needed some tops and casual pants. It was so exciting for me, to be able to pick up a size large, and have it fit! (Not even an XL, but just a L!!)
No more plus sized clothing!! Yay me! Now I'm just an average sized woman. I love it! I don't stick out in a crowd anymore. I don't feel like the biggest person in the room anymore. I feel fabulous at this weight. Anything else I lose is just going to be a bonus as far as I'm concerned. I'm 39 pounds from my goal weight, but to be honest, I haven't been a size 14 in at least 18-20 years, so this is thrilling beyond belief for me. I can hardly believe it sometimes.
I've passed on all my larger clothes to a friend in our WLS support group, who's mother had RNY in June. She's a size or two larger than me, so she wears the smaller stuff now, and then her mom will be able to wear it when it doesn't fit my friend anymore. I really enjoy giving my things to someone I know. Her mom is just like a kid at Christmas when I bring over bags of stuff. It's so cute! I've taken 2 huge loads over so far, and they are both thrilled, and thank me over and over again. It's a nice feeling.
So now I have a very weeded out closet, and I love seeing the empty space in there. No more closets crammed full of 5 different sizes of clothing! My friend asked me why I hung onto the larger sized things for so long. I told her I had to be ready to "just let it go". We all have attachments to certain things that were our favorites, or maybe spent a fortune on. It takes a while for us to adjust to our body size, and realise we're never going to be needing those things again. I love the empty space! I'm going to be getting rid of a lot of other stuff around the house that I never use too. I need the room to get organized. Clutter frustrates me, so I know it helps me mentally, when I have clear space and an organized closet.
On a totally different topic, my poor daughter Danielle has a large cyst on her left ovary, which had been causing her a lot of pain. I didn't know about it at all. I guess she didn't want to worry me. I was talking to her one night, and she sounded really down, which is very different than her usual way. I asked her if everything was OK. So she told me she had been to the doctor, and the doctor thought Danielle was suffering from depression.
I guess Danielle had been getting very emotional, and crying a lot, and was really tired, and not interested in doing things that she used to. Danielle just thought it was because she was really stressed at work, and she was worried about me being in and out of the hospital, and her live-in boyfriends mom is going through chemotherapy after breast cancer surgery. So she DID have a lot of stress in her life, but this was different and she knew it. So I think she's going to have to start taking anti-depressants, which is good, because depression runs in my family, and there's no need for her to suffer. She knows all the signs and symptoms because I've had it since I was pretty young, and she's not adverse to taking medication for it if it will help her feel like her old self again. I don't know if she'll be having surgery for the cyst anytime soon, but eventually she may have to. So I guess that's why I wasn't able to get her on the phone for days and days, because she was depressed, and probably didn't want to talk to anyone once she got home from work (which I totally understand). I've been there, and know what it's like. I'm just glad I finally know what was going on with her though!
Her and her boyfriend are looking to buy their first home, and I think they've found the place. Danielle's dad is a general contractor, so he's going to have a look at the house today. I really hope they get it, because it's beautifully finished inside, and it's in a cute little 40's neighbourhood right in Toronto. It has been totally renovated, and it's just so HER. If you want to look at the pictures, go to www.35gray.com
Hope everyone is happy, healthy, and enjoying these beautiful Indian Summer days.
Aug 25, 2009
It's probably been 18-20 years since I've been a size 14. I feel so awesome! I noticed a couple of guys checking me out today, and one guy tried picking me up in the shampoo aisle! LOL This is really a new feeling for me, as I've been on my own for over 4 years now, and had no relationships at all during that time. OMG, I might actually get a date! LOL
I've also noticed that the hair loss seems to be less, which is a relief. I've also been able to go off some of the medications I was taking, or at least reducing the doseages. That's a great feeling. It was one of my goals when I started this journey, and now it's here. Once I get this hernia fixed, I'll be all good.
I'm also going to an information session about joining the Durham Regional Police on Tuesday. They're hiring, so I went on their website, and asked if I could attend their next info session. I don't know if they would even consider hiring someone who's 50, but nothing ventured, nothing gained, right? I already have a good job with the government, but I've wanted to be a police officer for over 20 years. The timing was just never right, and of course my weight and my health were issues for the past 15-20 years. I just want to find out about the physical requirements, so I can use that as a goal for my fitness. If I thought there was even a chance that I could be hired, I'd be so motivated to reach the fitness goal. Wish me luck!
A huge WOW for me!
Aug 24, 2009
WELL, I shopped in the regular department!! Size large in the regular sizes. Woooo Hooooo!!!! No more plus size stuff! Yay me! And I can buy bra's off the rack, instead of in the "specialty" department too. So cool, and so much cheaper!
I can't even remember the last time I could shop in the regular sizes. It must be almost 20 years. I can hardly believe it!
I've been feeling really rough
Aug 13, 2009
I've been having problems with elevated liver enzyme levels, and my doctors were concerned. I also have an umbilical hernia, which has gotten rock hard 3 times, and been extremely painful. My pcp sent me to a surgeon about it, and he told me that if it ever gets that way again, I should go to emerg, because the intestine can become pinched off and start to die. If that happens, I'd be in for serious issues.
Not two days after I saw the specialist, it happened again. This was on the Saturday of the long weekend (August 1st). I went to the hospital emerg, and was in terrible pain. When I finally got to see a doctor, the first thing he said when he looked at it was "Oh my". Not good. Long story short, he said he would have to knock me out, and push the hernia back in. He and another doctor did it in the acute care ward. The other doctor left a note for me, asking me to come back on the Monday of the long weekend, just to make sure everything was OK. Well the hernia had popped back out the same night as they had pushed it back in, but at least it wasn't as painful.
When I went back to the hospital, the doctor was concerned about the pain I was still having, and he knew that the surgeon I saw earlier in the week about it, was on call. He asked me if I was up for some immediate surgery, and I said I was. I didn't want to go through another day like I did on the Saturday. So I waited for the surgeon to come and see me, and he ended up admitting me to the hospital overnight. He sent me for x-rays, and the next day I had a CT scan. Then he came in and told me there was no way he could get me in for surgery on an emergency basis, so he was going to discharge me, but he said on the CT scan they saw something in my lower right large intestine!!!!! He said they weren't sure what it was, it could just be poop, but it said on the report that "a tumour cannot be excluded". I thought "Oh GOD!! I don't know how much more of this I can take." He wanted to do a colonoscopy before he operated on my hernia. It's all very complicated and confusing.
I also had elevated liver enzymes before my rny surgery, but I was always told it was because I had fatty liver. The hernia was also there before surgery, but my pcp thought it would go down after I lost weight, because it was just filled with fat cells.
After I had my RNY, my liver enzymes were getting higher, so my pcp sent me to a liver specialist. He said he didn't think it had anything to do with the medications I take (which is one thing my pcp was concerned about), and he believed it was because of the RNY surgery. He agreed that it is common for the liver to be stressed when I am losing weight so fast, and I was supposed to follow up with him in late September. He felt that once my weight loss stablized, my levels would also.
He told me back in June when I first saw him, that I would have more bloodwork done in mid-September, and then if the enzymes were still elevated, he might have to put me on something, and the last thing he wanted to do was a liver biopsy, which isn't a very pleasant experience from what I understand.
When I was at the clinic seeing the surgeon about my hernia, I went down to the lab where I have a standing order to have my blood tested every 3 months for Dr Schram in Michigan who did my RNY. When my pcp got a copy of the blood work, she called me at home and left a message saying I should see the liver specialist right away. Not only were my enzyme levels NOT getting better, they were getting WORSE, and she thought I should have a liver biopsy done. I kind of lost it when I listened to the message. I bawled my eyes out!! My poor little cats didn't know what to do. They stood in the doorway watching me, like little kids who have never seen their mom cry! They didn't know what to do, but they knew something was wrong.
I thought, good lord, first the hernia, which can become extremely painful, then the "unknown finding" in my intestine (which is what the colonoscopy was going to be looking at), but then the thought of having to have a liver biopsy was the last straw. This is the really hard part about living alone. There's no one here to say "It'll be okay". No one to hug me, and reassure me. But after I had a really good cry and a good sleep, I felt much better. It just got a little overwhelming that one day.
I had also been having a lot of trouble connecting with my daughter. I was leaving vm mssgs for her, but she either wasn't calling me back, or she was ignoring me, or she was too busy or whatever, but that's totally not like her. So when I was in the hospital I had my friend who had taken me there, call Danielle and leave her a mssg saying I was in the hospital. Finally I got her attention! When we did finally get to talk, I told her about the concerns I was having, and that I had passed out twice. She came out last Saturday to stay overnight with me so we could talk, and just hang out.
I know she's really busy at work, and she has only so many hours in the day to spend with her boyfriend that she lives with, and then she has her friends, etc. It's just hard for me to know what to tell her, because I don't want to scare her, but I also need her support, so I have to tell her. Anyway, I'm glad she came out here, and I'm glad that I told her about everything. Her boyfriends mother had breast cancer surgery a couple of months ago, and is going thru chemo now. Hopefully they'll both realise that mom's won't always be here, and they need to appreciate us while we are.
Anyway, sorry for such a long and detailed novel! It feels good to pour it all out on "paper".
Down 71 pounds! My hair is falling out!!
Jun 17, 2009
I'm very happy that I'm down 71 pounds, with 72 more to go, and only 7 more to go until ONEDERLAND!! OMG, I cannot believe it! I don't remember the last time I was under 200 pounds. It's got to be at least 15 years.
Unfortunately my hair has started falling out, but I'm lucky because I have an incredibly thick head or hair, so most people won't notice it, but I sure do. I have a couple of wigs that I wear just for fun, so if it gets really bad I can always wear them. I really like them anyway, so it will give me an excuse to wear them more.
Yesterday I went grocery shopping, and spent $176 on food! LOL! I was out at my sisters for 2 weeks, babysitting her dogs while they went on vacation. When I came back home, I really needed to stock up on healthy things, but I was really in the mood for different things than I've gotten into the habit of eating. I bought pickled beets and cauliflower, a chicken lasagne, Stouffers veal parmigian with spagetti, black cherries (yummy), kiwi's, mangoes, watermelon, some juices, and all kinds of other things that I'm going to try. The last time I went shopping I bought one of the Campbells Chunky Chili's to try, and although it gave me a LOT of gas, it was easy to get down, very tasty, and loaded with protein. It's good to try new things! I like a lot of variety in my food, and on this WLS diet, it's easy to get into a rut.
While I was at my sisters place, I discovered I'm not a dumper. Long story short, after watching tv at her place, and not being able to zip through the commercials to avoid the food ads, I found myself eating things that I would never have at home. She is a junk food junkie, and had chocolates out in a bowl, fudge in the cupboard, marshmallow brooms in the fridge, sweet & sour chicken in the freezer. You name it, they have it. Let's just say I tried all of it (several times) and didn't have any problems with the sugar at all. That's good, but it's bad! So when I got home I had to buy lots of healthy foods that I love (which is why I bought all the fruit), so I wouldn't be tempted to buy any of the crap that I ate at her place.
While I was there, their computer wasn't working, so I had no internet for the 2 weeks! I really rely on The Daily Plate to keep track of my food intake, and protein amounts. I was totally lost without it. I don't think I ate nearly enough, or drank nearly enough, so I only lost about 1 pound over that week, even though I was exercising more than I have in years by walking the dogs 4 times a day. But I was happy that I didn't gain, considering how little control I felt that I had. I was really relieved to get back home and into my own little routine. It's amazing how being outside of your comfort zone for very long, can really knock you off the rails.
Our WLS support group is going great, and we have 62 members now. We're having our first clothing exchange tomorrow, and I hope we have a decent turnout. I have a lot of things to get rid of, and it would be nice to pass them on to someone I know. I've sold some of my things at a consignment store nearby, and got a few dollars for them which helps.
Hope everyone is having a great day!
I crossed my legs!!!!!
May 24, 2009
It's so weird too, because I was just out on Friday night with my friend Gail, and we were talking about it. She was saying she couldn't wait until she could cross her legs. I said to her that when she does, she probably won't even notice for a second or two, and then she'd look down and realise OMG, my legs are crossed!!!" Well that's what happened to me tonight. It was so weird, but so exciting. It felt funny to me, because my legs are so much thinner now, I can actually feel the edges of the muscles in my legs. Once I start using that excersize bike regularly, hopefully my thighs will tone up and be even thinner.
I just realised today, that with my new BMI of 36, I am just "obese", and not "extremely obese" anymore! I'll be closing in on that "overweight" category this summer for sure.
Down 66 pounds! Yay me!
May 23, 2009
At 14 weeks I was officially down 66 pounds, which includes the 15 I lost prior to surgery. I am thrilled beyond belief. Even though the first 10 weeks or so was difficult at times, I LOVE MY RNY!
I got a free exercize bike on Freecycle.org this week. I couldn't afford to buy a piece of exercize equipment, so I posted, hoping that someone would have an old one they were using for a hanger, and would be willing to part with it. Well a lady emailed me back right away, and said that they had one that her hubby had used while recuperating from back surgery, and I was welcomed to it! I was right there that night, picking it up. It's an older model, but works great, and is just what I needed.
The Durham Region OH Weight Loss Support Group is going great, and we have 9 new members, for a total of 56, and a new permanent meeting place. It's pretty exciting, because now we'll be able to have speakers come in, and get a little formal education along with the social aspect of it.
I'm painting my bathroom. Well, lets say it started out as just a paint job. I took down the towel bar, and tp holder, because I've always disliked them anyway. I also had a white grab bar that was installed by the previous owner, but it is on the wall outside the shower curtain, and was kind of useless, so I took that out too. (There is one inside the shower area, which I left). When the last owner moved out, she took the hooks off the back of the bathroom door, and put up those cheap 3-M stick on ones, so I had to take those off, and scrape the glue off that was underneath them.
Then I decided I would like to replace my mirror eventually, so I started unscrewing the little thingies that hold it on. The mirror is quite tall, so I had to get on the ladder, and step on the vanity to get to the top ones. While I was up there, I started looking at the light fixture, which was a horrible flourescent tube, set into a 4' box that matched the cabinets, and shone upwards. It also had 2 small pot lights that shone down on the sink area, but they hadn't worked since I moved in, and I could never figure out how to change the bulbs (I even had an electricial look at them!). So, I ended up taking down the entire box with the light fixtures in it!
Needless to say, I had LOTS of holes to fill, sand, etc. It was hard work, and I've been picking away at it for a week. I got everything taped off, and its ready to paint now. I bought a new light fixture, towel bar, tp holder, and hooks for the back of the door. I think it will be gorgeous once it's done. Oh, I also have to figure out how to install a light fixture, which I've never done before. I'm pretty handy, but that is one thing I've never tackled.
If anyone had ever told me that I would be buying tools, and renovating my bathroom by myself, I would have laughed. After my experience with taking down my old vertical blinds, and putting up new rods and drapery panels in 3 rooms, I was quite proud of myself! I even bought myself a drill. Then I painted my entire apartment, except for the bedrooms and bathroom. It took me about a month and a half, because I have fibromyalgia, but I got it done, and was so pleased with the results. It should be a little easier painting now, since I've lost 66 pounds since I did it the last time, so wish me luck on the bathroom!
I also went shopping for the first time last night, with my good friend Gail. It was quite an experience! First, she gave me some beautiful clothes that no longer fit her. I was so thrilled that someone would give me such lovely things!
Then we went to Value Village. I got a great pair of cargo pants from Old Navy for $7.99, and 2 gorgeous drapery panels that had just come in that day, for $9.99 a panel. Also picked up a few other items for $1.99 to $4.99 each. Then we went out for a small bite to eat, and had a great evening.
Well, if you've reached the end of this epic, thanks for reading, and I hope everyone is doing well and enjoying this beautiful weather.
4 WOW's this week!
May 02, 2009
Second, I saw my best friend on Thursday night, who I hadn't seen for 11 weeks. She looked after me for the 3 days after I was home from surgery, before my daughter came. She phoned me the next day, and said that she was amazed at how I looked. She said it was a good thing I hadn't changed my hair, or she wouldn't have even recognized me! I asked her if she was serious, and she said "well put it this way, if you had come over here with long hair, I would have had to do a double take that's for sure". I was really surprised, but it was a wonderful reaction from someone who knows me so well. I guess when we see ourselves every day, we don't notice the changes as much as someone who hasn't seen us for almost 3 months.
Third, I got into my size 16 jeans!!!! I couldn't believe it! I was so excited! I have 2 pairs that I've had for about 5 years, and luckily I saved them, but after this, I'll have to start buying.
Fourth, my BMI has gone down from 47.7 down to 37.7 with the 58.5 pound loss. I am thrilled, because that will be my ultimate goal; getting down to a normal range in my BMI. To be down 10 points, I am beyond happy!
I went to see my doctor this week, and he was really pleased that I have been getting out and socializing more. After my recent depression, he was really glad to know that I have made friends (Kattzia and Gail B. thank you, thank you, thank you!!) who have dragged me out even when I didn't really feel like going, and then ended up having a wonderful time despite myself! He wants me to do more of that, and to try and not miss any more of the support group meetings, because I enjoy them so much.
Hope everyone is enjoying this spring weather!