wcumom1

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I'm moving right along I hope...went to my education class tonight very informative, i know even after surgery I cant give these up, and they're just a hour.  Going for a physical this week, there i will get my referals for pap, mammo and pulmo.....then just three more classes to attend, oh yea.......and my 2nd appointment with psych. on 3-16.  Going to classes give me a boost, almost like church! oh and i have to take a preop test to see if i've done my homework about RNY, think i'll get a B atleast.  My husband is good with this, so thats helps.  I just want to get off meds and be healthly, which includes weight loss!! found out tonight that up to 10% of surgery patients fail, and gain back weight, and I don't want to be a statistic!! I'm hoping all goes smooth with the rest of my "to do's" sometimes the military is just slow, but that's okay.  I'd be more worried if they rushed me through  it.  It just takes time to get into appointments, my last physical was canceled and rebooked, so it was a slight set back.  Today is a good day, for the most part, not like my last post!!

some days are rough... trying to eat right, smaller portions..... trying push away the junk, i look at the before and after pictures on here, and wonder if that will ever be me.  i want to feel good again, not wake up tired and achy, to not have my weight keep me inside, unmotivated and lazy... i want to be a good example of weight loss, proper eating habits... to not hide cookies in a secret cupboard, to eat when no one is home.  not to get those funny looks when you go out to eat, like someone saying jeeze she don't need to be here! i want my husband to be proud of me, to show me off, to feel beautiful to look beautiful to over come this burden, the weight burden, it's almost like alcoholism....but with food, like a heroin addict looking for the next fix, like a food addict, drooling over the last frosted brownie.  One day I WILL OVER COME, one day, one day, one day.........one day at time.  Today is not a good day, today is a bad day.......i weigh 251 i should weigh 143... I'm hungry, i have a headache and I've been out of work for 1 1/2 months with a foot surgery that just went south on Friday, maybe a infection, maybe a bug bite, maybe gangrene, who knows, cant see the doctor until tomorrow, maybe he'll cut my foot off, there's a 2 lb loss, but anyway it's painful just the same.  Some Days you just need a hole to crawl into.....good thing I'm alone today... i would not be good company.  The light at the end of the tunnel, is my surgery, my hope, my last hope....the day could not be soon enough if they called me in tomorrow, but i haven't finished my preop check list, but i will soon, as quick as possible.  I know many people feel the same way I do and I hope they all get the help they need like me.  Tomorrow will be a better day, I know it

I got this web site at one of my meetings on ft bragg.  I am trying to get gastric bypass.  I have done my labs, going for a psychology eval next week, and i'm going to attend a nutrition class tonight.  I have to attend 3 nutrition classes and 3 bypass support group meetings.  I am 45, married to a retired solider, have a daughter in college, 2 cats and a beagle.  I have been over weight since I can remember, i can remember buying "chubby" clothes... not  now they're plus sizes or womens, i'd sure like to wear a large, or better yet a medium.  I am currently 107 overweight, by their standards..... i should weight 143, up until my first dr appt i thought i was 5' 8 im really 5'6 WOW im even fatter, my weight is pulling me down, and i've SHRUNK!!  they say if im approved and pass all my tests i can be having surgery as soon as spring!  I am tryng to get all my stuff completed  I have to get pulmonary functon test, mammo, pap, physical and a few more things, I'll do any thing.... i am that desperate, i hoping to meet friends on here, people who are going through this also, someone to help with ups and downs.  I want to track my progress for future reference. Wish me luck!!