CJ P.

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I am in alot of pain. I will call the surgeon after I get off work. I can't leave early again or miss another day- we'll be really bad off. Its hard enough with all the bills and the cost of gas! I don't think its my ulcer. Maybe its gas or constipation- never dealt with that but I haven't had a bowel movement ---- a real one---- in several days.

Well today is wonderful. I have decided I am only weighing myself once a month on my surgery date, this way I am not dissapointed on the days I gain a pound or don't lose. I have also decided to stop being a couch potato and to start measuring myself also once a month to see if I don't lose weight maybe it will be the inches. I blame myself for being in the bad moods I've been in lately. I wasn't taking my meds correctly or at all for almost two weeks. I have started back on that regimen again. I need the happy pills. It had little to do with my weight. Even during my thinner moments I had issues with depression and anxiety. Surgery will not fix these things only time will and counseling. I have a busy day ahead. I'll write later.....

I left work early Wednesday because of vomiting. Thursday I called off because of vomiting. I'm back to work and feel awful. What is wrong with me? I can't understand why I am having so many issues. Ulcer, Strictures and vomit. Good thing- my blood pressure is way down so no need for meds! My muscles are weak and I can't make myself excercise. I need to. I am out of the stall I was in but I could help myself by excercising more. Its difficult because its so humid and hot outside and if I go inside I have an audience. Maybe I'll go to bed earlier and get up earlier to exercise before work.

Well, I am vomiting again. I lasted almost 1 week without any issues and yesterday afternoon I started with lunch and have continued through breakfast this morning. Called the doc. We'll see what happens later. I uploaded my after surgery pics finally.

THANK YOU!!!!! I weighed again.... I know I shouldn't weigh daily but I'm still under 300 pounds!!!!!!

I think my stall is over.... notice I say think, I don't want to jinx myself!!!lol... I weighed in Saturday and lost 4.5 pounds!!! I didn't weigh myself today. I'm trying not to weigh myself daily. If this holds true I am officially under 300 pounds!!!!!

YEAHHHHH!!! I get to sleep in tommorrow....which means I'll be up around 7:30 but its still sleeping in and no work!!!!! Tonight is the full moon so my husband and I will spend some time doing what we do- probably some meditating or reflecting on the past month and then we are grilling out and sitting around the fire. It will be a good night. Tommorrow we are going to go drive to some farmer's markets and just get out of the house, probably go to the park. Sunday I need to pull weeds and decide how I want the garden next year. It was too late to plant this year so next year we will have 3 seperate gardens- 1 for vegetables, 1 for herbs and 1 for medicinal plants or flowers. With the economy so shitty we have to start growing our own food. I can't afford it anymore. We do have two fruit trees so that helps- a cherry and an appleand we have blackberry bushes. I was thinking of planting strawberries and grape vines.

About RNY. I still am happy I did it. Even if I don't lose anymore. Yea I'm more than alittle pissed off over this stall. Still haven't lost SHIT!!! Its been 28 days- almost a full month since I lost a pound!!! Its weird because I have lost inches but is it muscle or what? I eat barely anything at all!!!! I don't know what to do. My surgeon said to be patient but if I was a patient person with willpower I would not have had surgery!!! I could do it on my own. This is pissing me off just typing about it. I should stop.

This is my first post of the day and I may post again later. Its about 8am, I'm at work and my energy is awful. I've been this way all week. Since I haven't had any labs done I don't know whats going on. no one seems too concerned about it though. I have been getting plenty of sleep but I don't want to get out of bed in the mornings and on the weekend I want to take a nap but they turn into 4 hours- that's not a nap!!! later......

Well, I went to see my surgeon for a check up on my ulcer. The last few days have not been pleasant. If I eat anything other than soup I get sick.so I told him about it. He says he's not worried and I shouldn't be either. Its all from the ulcer and as soon as it heals the pain and vomitting will be gone. He also said he's not worried about my weight loss. I guess I'm ok. I have to go back next Thursday for another checkup. He gave me his cell phone number to call after there office closes. Its supposed to be closed on July 31st but he says he will still be in the office until the end of August and will also be working in the hospital so I will still have my wonderful doctor!!! My pouch makes all kinds of entertaining noises now. It sounds like it wants to talk..... I never claimed to be sane ok.... I do talk to my pouch though....... Back to the surgeon.... He also told me not to make my protein shakes with milk. I am now using diet green tea and fruit. I also got my samples I ordered!!! I was so happy they came in. I have about 15 samples and my emersion blender and calcium powder ans SF Syrups.... this makes me happy..... Well almost time to get of work.

It started out I had to work but all in all it wasn't so bad. After work my husband and I went to visit friends. We always have a good time. Most people would find it boring but we always have good conversation. Its nice to talk to other adults on occasion!!LOL I am feeling pretty tired. Liquids seem to make me that way. I have now lost a good amount of weight. I know I've been upset with the stall but I look back and I never could have lost over 30 pounds in a month before RNY. Permanently!!! I have had so much positive feed back from everyone on here and at work. I don't think I could make it otherwise. Well time for bed.....