FULLSTEAMAHEAD

Send Message

Block

Add Friend

When I look back over the past year, I see it as a tremendously fast blur, that has changed the person that I have become today.  July 20, 2009, ouch!  I remember thinking back at child birth and thinking, "that hurt bad, but I soon forgot the pain", how bad can it be.  I think it is nature that our minds forget the physical but sometimes never the mental pain that we are subjected to in the game of life.  My RNY was without complications thanks to the ever so skilled hands of Dr. Jonathan Aranow.  My post op visits were great and all I can say to his staff and Julie, is thank you from the bottom of my heart.  You guys were all so kind and courteous.  
I returned to work 3 weeks post op as a Home Care Nurse.  I did well, and with each day, I noticed myself becoming more energized.  My life was changing though.  Little things like my clothes getting too big, being more energenic, wanting to get back doing things that hurt me to do when I was at 308 pounds.  Little aha moments, "I didn't know I could reach that part on my body, lol....", being able to get in and out of my car without it being a big deal, walking my dogs without my hips hurting, riding my bicylce and feeling the seat, in a comfortable way.  Buying size (((((   14   )))) clothes!!!!!!!! My God if I could remember them all, all the little moments.  I like me a lot better and as a result, all the people around me like me better too.   It is hard when you come from a world where people treat you as if you have some kind of comminicable disease, when you are obese.  My illness is one of the mind and therefore could never be caught by my sneezing on you.  My illness is dark and has taken me through darkness perhaps no one but another obese person could understand.  
I keep my former self with me,  I have a picture of her on my refridgerator.  To remember her is my salvation, to forget her is to relive the past.  No thank you. 
To anyone out there, this means you Mary, go for it, it is a journey of a lifetime :)

Last year on New Years day, I sat.  I weighed in at 308 pounds.  I was severly depressed and despondent.  I often wondered why my husband would want to be with a woman who couldnt do a lot of things most folks take for granted,  I couldn't walk very far as my hips hurt, I couldn't do a lot of things. 
On a whim, I visited OH website as I had done many times in the past.  Boredom was my friend on this day though.  I am not sure if it was devine intervention or what, but something made me go to my insurance companies website and read my certificate of coverage.  The wording changes frequently as I know as a nurse.  To my amazement, my insurance company no claimed that they covered gastric bypass for the morbidly obese.  Of course, I was now a type 2 diabetic on top of being huge.  I went to Dr Aranow's little preop group.  I needed to get the paperwork started.  And that is what I did and in July 2009 my life changed forever.

I have a lot to be thankful for today.  I weigh 199 pounds and I am still losing.  NEVER in my wildest dreams did I think I would ever weigh less than 200 pounds. 
All I can say is if. your insurance company gives you a hard time about paying for your surgery, keep trying.  I was denied twice but it didn't stop me.  My pursuit paid off and in a big way.  I thank the Lord for blessing me with health again.  I am sure that I did the right thing.  The hardest part is learning that a big plate is something you will never use again.  I couldn't be happier and nothing can break my stride.  To everyone who reads this who is still wondering if they are making the right decision...YOU ARE.  Just wait until you see the results.  Size 26 jeans to a size 16 jeans in just 5 months...whoooohoooo
Happy New Year everyone.  Love yourself first....everything else will just fall into place!

Here it is, my monthly post.  I now weigh 221.2 pounds!  I started at 308 pounds on April 1st!  That makes me 87 pounds lighter than I weighed just 6 short months ago!  I am flabbergasted at this weight loss.  I lost 16 pounds from September 20 to October 15th.  I am proud of my progress.  My husband can't believe it and most the time I can't either.  I feel good, have lots of energy and wow, what's not to like about the new me.
I am busy, in college full-time, a full time job and a part time job as a flu clinic nurse.  Not to forget to mention, we adopted a new pooch, so now I am taking lots of walks.  I love it though.  I wouldn't change a single thing in my life right now. 
I have had a few aha moments and I am going to start logging them.  Being able to bend over and wipe up a spill on the floor without hurting to do so.  Being able to walk really fast.  Being able to get rid of all my old clothes.  They are all wayyyy tooo big. 
I am thinking about a new haircut soon.  My hair is a little thin right now.  I find it hard to get in that 60 grams of protein a day.  We are attending OH in Rye NY next weekend, I can't wait... Will only be there on Saturday though, can't leave my babies overnight.  That is about it for now, next post......Thanksgiving time......

I was officially two months post op on the 20th of September.  It worked out well because I have decided to only weigh myself once a month.  I have lost another 12.5 pounds since August 28, when I had my last office visit at my Surgeon's office.  WOW, A few item of clothing that I had been waiting to reduce enough to get into are now too large.  I am trying to keep up with the clothing demands of my ever shrinking body.  I am so happy.  I feel very well.  I am eating what I think to be enough.  Some days I find it difficult to get all of my protein requirement in, but I am diligent about working at it.  My hips and knees do not ache when I walk distances anymore.  Funny thing is, I quit the anti-inflammatories that I took for arthritis, 2 weeks before surgery.  I no longer have any pain or swelling of my lower extremities.  I walk about 3 miles per day, and I am planning on starting back at the gym, the beginning of October.  I adopted a second dog, and the dogs keep me moving.  They love their walks.

 I have lost a total of 60 pounds since I started my pre-op diet until now, 4 weeks out of surgery.   My clothing is beginning to feel too big.  I treated myself to some summer clearance pants and a shirt on Friday.  I am now in a size 18 bottom, down from a size 26!  My top size is now 2X, down from 3X!  I felt so good.  I even bought myself a new necklace and earrings.  I am starting to feel like a woman again, and wanting to dress in womanly style instead of "I just don't care style"!  I am starting to feel good again about my decision.  Food is no longer controlling my every move and mood....
I questioned if I had made the right decision right after I got home from the hospital.  I would become frustrated/stressed with something, and want to eat!  I no longer have eating to soothe my stress, as an option.  YAY    So, the people in my family who were causing me stress, I explained this to.  They understood, and we all try to maintain a tolerable stress level in our home.  I also started retaking my anti-depressant which I was off for about a week post op.  I felt lousy for a good two weeks after surgery.  Of course I was feeling better each day, but I still felt lousy.  The weather was so hot and muggy, I spent most of my time indoors, in the air conditioning.  On week three, I decided to go back to work.  Incision line healed.  It was the best decision I made.  The last two weeks, since I returned, have flown by.  My normal routine is returning.  I have had some issues with constipation due to the iron in the vitamins I am taking.  Flintstones complete, which is what my doctor requests us to take.  I bought prune juice today to try and loosen the constipation up a bit.  I hope it all works out.  I only dumped once since surgery when I tried to add sugar free Hershey's syrup into a vanilla protein drink.  Chocolate like products have been totally shelved.  I am also lactose intolerant.  I am using Smart Balance lactose/fat free milk now.  I eat very little.  I am only eating about an ounce at a meal.  Eggs aren't my best friend anymore either.  I gag when I try to eat them.  Maybe later.  I am seeing my Doctor on the 28th.  It is supposed to be my 4 week check up, but it is 2 weeks overdue, due to vacation time by the APRN, who is who I am seeing.  I am hoping for a diet upgrade to step 5 of the diet program.  I am psyched.  I am also going to return to the gym real soon.  I want to maximize these "honeymoon months" after WLS, and loose as much as I can.  I feel great about the changes that I am seeing and feeling, as well as how I am feeling about myself.  My ASN college classes resume next week.  My RN license is my next big goal.  My long-term goal is a MSN in nursing.  Since I am 50 years old now, I am not sure what is driving me to do this, except maybe personal accomplishment.  By the time I am done with classes, I will probably be 65!  That is it for now.  I am only getting weighed on the 20th of each month from here on out.  Weight fluctuations on the scale tend to bother me if I try to get a weekly reading.  Therefore I am going to monthly weights so I can see a good measurable loss.  I will try to post photo soon.  Thanks to all my OH friends and my family for their continued support with my goals.    

 I weighed myself today and I weighed 253 pounds, which means I have lost another 10 pounds since my last post.  It is truly amazing!  I am back to walking my dog for our 3 mile a day trek.  She is so happy and so am I.  I can already feel increased stamina, now that I have lost the equivalent of a 5 year old.  I am eating Stage 4 diet now, which is hard to get in.  I feel full so quickly.  My incision has healed and I am on my way back to work on Monday.  I am a visiting nurse and my job is not the regular 8 hour a day on a unit nursing job.  It is not strenuous and I love my line of work, so I am more than happy to go back.  I will post again soon.  Thanks to all my friends on OH.

 I weighed 291 pounds just last Tuesday when I got weighed at the hospital.  This morning I weigh 264.2!  That is so cool.  I have lost 26.8 pounds in one week!  I worked on my diet since April 1st to loose weight before my surgery and only managed to loose  27 pounds.  My total weight loss since April 1st is now, 53.8 pounds!  
This is so exciting!  I actually feel like my clothes are starting to feel a little bigger.  
I am able to take in most of the liquids and proteins that I need and all is well with the plumbing.
The only real issues that I am having are the incision line has a tiny opening way up at the top of it and has a micro amount of drainage.  I had internal stitching then dermabond on the outside and steristrips over all of that.  Being a nurse, I am trying to keep it clean and dry.  Of course the location of this incision is in a hard place for us ladies to keep real dry as it starts just under the breast bone.  It is getting rubbed by the bra and with all this darn humidity, it is one of my sweaty places.  I also feel a little stitch under my left rib cage when I breath really deep.  I have done deep breathing and meditation for years and when I say I breath deep, I actually lift my abdomen when I breath.  OH well, I will stay abreast of these issues and if I feel the need to call the doctor I will.  Right now I am not too alarmed about any of it though.  I welcome comments.  Until I feel the need to blog, or next Mondays weigh in, good luck and God bless all my OH friends!

 Follow up with MD, Monday, August 3rd 1pm.  By then I will be feeling better.  I made it to the losers bench on Monday and I am sore.  I guess that is to be expected though, right?  I gained 10 pounds of IV Fluid weight in the hospital.  I am only getting weighed on Mondays so stay posted for the next update.  

 My procedure is at 6am.  It is now 930pm.  I never go to bed this early.  But then again, I don't usually get up and out to my destination by 6am either.  I want to be rested, so this is all I am going to write tonight.  See you in a few days if all goes well.  Say a little prayer for me.    

 My surgery is scheduled for early morning Monday.  I am nervous.  I think my spouse is a little nervous also as he has a tendency to be short fused when something is up in his life.  I know I must be hell to live with right now though.  "The fear of the Unknown", looms over us.  I know that it is the right thing to do.  My fasting blood sugars are high, my joints ache, my back kills me every night, and I am sick and tired of being obese.  It only takes one horror story to put the fear of God into me.  I know in my heart that this is the going to be the start of a new and different kind of life for me.  My 2 youngest stepchildren have been staying with us this past week.  It can get hectic for 2 empty nesters!  They are 16 and 9 and full of the "I'm Bored!"
I will be happy to take them home to New Hampshire this Saturday.  That will give us one day to re-arrange my living room into a convalescing room for me to perk up in.  I have a full size bed that will be parked in the living room.  It will be easier to get to the bathroom, as we are a one bathroom family and that bathroom is on the first floor.  I went to Target today and purchased some sample size goods for my hospital stay.  I also have a new pair of Crocs to walk my hospital mile in.  Slip on, Slip off, no laces, no straps.  Easy shoes.  I am starting to realize that I have clothing in all sizes.  I am going to wait until after surgery to see what I want to keep for a while and what can go byby.  I have a friend who already requested my clothing.  She is needy and I am glad I can help her a little.
I could blog all day, but I have other things that I could and should be doing.  Bye for now!