35 BMI is not a comfortable and healthy place to be. There is so much misunderstanding and judgment about weight loss surgery. It is not a miracle cure that lets you continue unhealthy eating or inactive lifestyle.

It is a tool that helps you to eat less, get more energy, and achieve a healthy BMI. The world is full of people whose lives would be very much improved with weight loss surgery. Sadly, very few of them will ever get the help that they need. Some cannot afford to pay for it and don't have insurance to cover it. But the majority could do it and are stopped by the type of comments you have received.

With your conditions, I hope you are not scheduled for a VSG or sleeve. You need a surgery that includes malabsorption. The best of diabetes is the DS with about 90% chance of diabetes going into remission and staying there. In your case, never getting full diabetes.

RNY is the next best choice with about 75% chance of no diabetes. The VSG or sleeve is about 50% chance. The VSG is quick and easy, and surgeons prefer it because they make about the same money for less work. For the patient, keeping weight off after the first few honeymoon years, DS is the best option.

Surgery involves changing your lifestyle. For me, that was really easy when I am never hungry and can only eat a few bites at a meal. I had RNY surgery in 2007 and still have not experienced hunger. I have to remember to eat. I also get in as much exercise as possible, weigh myself daily, and attend Weigh****chers to help control the number of calories that I consume.

I eat a high protein, low carb diet and if I started to eat a lot of carbs again, my hunger would return.

I bought Ikeas best springs and a foam topper I think mattress for about $479 I think for a queen for Brooklyn and also for Florida .

I liked it so much I bought the same for Long Island - and im equally comfortable wherever I go .

I really liked bamboo / no outgassing plastic mattresses to but they were way out of my modest price range .

I'm glad you reached out and found support this way. I'm lucky that my husband and children support me. I won't share with my best friend because I KNOW she will not approve- she will feel the risks aren't worth it. Self esteem depression, not doing things because of weight, current health issues.... that's a risk... not feeling like I'm ever going to be dedicated enough to lose the amount of weight I need to lose to even touch Overweight let alone healthy weight. I looked into the surgeries and scared myself out of one of them but decided on another. It's right for me. You know what's right for you. I'm the most motivated and dedicated I've ever been because I feel hope and trust that I can get there before I die..... that makes it right.... you know. I am sorry you don't have support with family but you have support with people who get your struggles. God luck and keep posting.

It's not vain to want to get fit and feel good about yourself. I had the Sadi DS in Nov 2014 and was considered a lightweight for wls (under 40bmi) with co-morbids. I did not ask anyone's permission or views about the surgery, and I have many people in my family. The surgery helped me achieve a much healthier weight and lifestyle. It would have never been possible w/o wls for me to lose the amount of weight I needed to, and keep it off. It's your health and your decision. My experience is that a majority of the nay-sayers are overweight and lead unhealthy lifestyles but somehow feel they should be telling you what is best.

FYI - There are many wls support groups for both in-person and online support. Your physician should be able to help you identify some.

I do have a latex mattress. There are no springs but it does have cores for support. Part of what sold me on it initially is that they're supposed to be cooler than regular mattresses. I'd say that's true. This past year I have added a memory foam topper since I had previously liked firmer mattresses but seem to feel everything more as I age. Part of what helped was going in and laying down on everything they had on display. So for me, latex worked. No springs in mine, though.