lilmiss6678

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So- here I am 3 months out and NOT doing as well as I'd like to be!  I find that not much makes me sick  but Chicken (if too dry) and Tuna (ALWAYS)  I was doing great at first--not drinking at all. I fell off the wagon and started partying pretty hard when I met some new people and started hanging with my old friends.  But, I saw that destructive behavior that became habitual. The eye opener was a day at the lake I drank ALLLLL DAYYY LOONNNGGG and didnt eat ANYTHING. not even once- thats sooo bad!  i was sooo drunk i mean, i get smashed 1/2 a glass of wine in now- but let me tell u I was a bottle of Whiskey in random shots dehydrated a few coors lights...and I didnt even throw up but I was drunk until the next day at like noon then the hang over set in..I swore off booze then 2 nights later I was smashed again someone just told me oh come on just one drink- well shots of patron later...i was sloppy and just disgusted.  a good friend who just had surgery callled to express to me her concern- thank god she did-  I was making a mess of myself and potentially on a rotten road for a good time!  I have kinda always battled alcoholism since I was younger...but finally im getting my head on straight. I didnt even celebrate cinco de mayo!  I went out jogging last night did some pilates...rested played wii.  =) read the bible a bit.  it was nice- kinda sucks though knowing all my friends were out having the time of their lives and I was home resting- but it felt good.  I eat a lot of vegetables mostly broccoli green beans and zuchini lots of fruit.. I am seeing my psych today at 2 just to talk to him about cross addiction and some counseling to get some things that are coming up dealt with.  =)  it feels good to be in control again.  thankfully.   Please just keep me in some prayers.  I need some support somewhere ...everything is just a giant party where I am from and fast food....  
 p.s. today before noon KFC has coupons for a free meal at unthinkfc.com

today I am down 52 lbs from my heaviest weight.. and im thankful.  80 oz of water is my goal im already at 40... an hour of pilates and a 30 min jog.  heres to what i shoulda been doing all along. daaang it!

Sooo....today I went to my 3 week post op appt, and the dr said I am doing great. and I only have 65 more lbs to lose until I reach my goal weight- wierd.  I told her I was discouraged I only lost 22 lbs total. she said It will come off slower on me because I am 'closer' to where I need to be in the start, and to have my thyroid checked again tomorrow that it might be out of wack making it harder for me.  and lord knows, that thryoid of mine, is an on going battle of my life!  So..I was pleased with what the dr said, and now, I am just gonna try to drink 80 oz of water a day, its my challenge to myself, and try to work out harder, not exactly longer, bc hell someone already asked if im paying rent at the gym (im serious, some guy at the bar last night..)soo... more intensity and some more weight training. 
ok so that was my little update.  I cant lose weight, dr said im at a stand still, and that basically this will happen a lot and eventually I'll start losing inches.

frickin great.
I miss food, I miss booze, I miss the biggest jerk ever, I miss my best friend, I miss working.

daaamn it!

I went to the Dr today, and everything was great, I have lost 16 percent of my excess body weight- which he says is water weight anyways. 22 lbs of f-ing water, are you kiddddddding me? and i can go to the gym and begin cardio-today, vitamins-today, SOFT FOODS-today (thank god, the thought of jello and broth makes me want to..you know.)   he said i am doing great and in a week I lost what i should be losing in a month.  weeeee! :)

well then.  im going to be doing laundry, cleaning my room, and getting my life back in order while i wait to be hungry and EAT some beans or mashed up eggs. mmm....(not scrambled)

whoo- im getting excited, finally enjoying this decision!

Heeeyyy! I am feeling great, I am almost confused about it! I just spoke to my Dr.'s RN and she said everything sounds great, and just to drink some smart water- since im not getting too many electrolytes...and to walk walk walk. so after I post this I am going to go walk my little dog. so she cant pull me and hurt my incisions. lol :)  I am so happy and in a little pain, I did mild house work today laundry cleaned my room and bathroom.  Got a new candle too. it smells sooooo good! :) ofcourse it is called 'Tighty Whities' i love scents of scandal!  :)  its the brand! and I like pool boy! i recomend them to anyone!  I am getting a girl friend of mine some for each of her bridesmaids and funny gifts. :) it will be priceless! :)  ahh soooo I cant get over how OK, i am feeling. still no hunger, just loving LOVING water.  go figure. finished 8 bottles yesterday. :)  okkay well I dont have much to say.  The love of my little life text me today, he such a bastard!  I didnt even write back, but i wanted to!  I gave him up when I had my surgery. leaving all the bad stuff behind... soo wish me luck, i need it. hes like poison. 

I love life. and I am usually a  total complainer!

so yesterday i had my surgery. today i am home, and in some pain but not horrible. i feel like a did a million sit ups and got punched in the stomach a few hundred times. hahah.  :)  well. i just wnted ot thank everyone who has talked to me well on my way to doing this...I hope I just get everything right!

:)

keep in touch with me!
valerie