gingerly1983
daaaamn it!
Aug 17, 2010
well....I have gained 5 lbs. grrrr It could be water weight, I haven't taken my water pill in a while and my feet are constantly swollen. I'll take a water pill when I get home from work and see what happens. I'm kinda pissed about this weight gain. It's ALL in my belly. What's weird is that my upper arms are actually smaller and have more loose skin than they did before. My neck and collarbones look a little smaller. It's just all in my dang belly! The only thing that has changed in my diet is that I've been eating a lot of fresh fruit and veggies. I have been craving soup for like 3 weeks so I've been experimenting with low carb soups. I'll make a big pot and eat on it for several days. Last night I made one, turned out pretty damn good!!
Cauliflower and Sausage Soup (My recipe...no stealsies lol)
1 head of cauliflower
1 lb ground turkey sausage
a few cloves of garlic, minced
salt, pepper to taste
about 1/2 stick of butter
2 cans evaporated milk
onion powder to taste
boil the cauliflower til tender, drain the water
add evaporated milk, and one can of water..turn on medium-high heat
brown the sausage and garlic together, drain, add to mixture
add onion powder and butter
bring to a boil, then turn on low and let simmer for 15ish minutes.
it's pretty good ;)
Well..I'd write more but I'm at work and the boss is comin down the hallway!!
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Cauliflower and Sausage Soup (My recipe...no stealsies lol)
1 head of cauliflower
1 lb ground turkey sausage
a few cloves of garlic, minced
salt, pepper to taste
about 1/2 stick of butter
2 cans evaporated milk
onion powder to taste
boil the cauliflower til tender, drain the water
add evaporated milk, and one can of water..turn on medium-high heat
brown the sausage and garlic together, drain, add to mixture
add onion powder and butter
bring to a boil, then turn on low and let simmer for 15ish minutes.
it's pretty good ;)
Well..I'd write more but I'm at work and the boss is comin down the hallway!!
prayer of fustration
Aug 07, 2010
Dear God,
Please help me to listen to my band and stop overeating. Please help me to measure out 1/2 cup portions and to not go back to the fridge for 'just one more' 1/2 cup portion. Please help me to eat only the salad if I have to go to Olive Garden with my family. I ate Olive Garden twice in one week and gained 4 lbs. I give up. I do NOT want any more pasta! Please help me to stay away from carbs. Please help me to be happy with what I have accomplished so far. I am wearing a size 16. I haven't been a 16 since 7th grade. That was 13 years ago! I haven't been this small in 13 years. Please help me to appreciate that. Help me believe that I am doing a great job. I know I have lost more than the average banded person that is 14 months out, but I am really struggling to believe it. Please help me to deal with stress better. Help me to not go to the fridge and graze when I'm stressed out. Please help me to feel motivated to exercise. I have all the tools I need for this journey. Please help me to use them. Please guide me to the right answers. I need help.
Amen
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Please help me to listen to my band and stop overeating. Please help me to measure out 1/2 cup portions and to not go back to the fridge for 'just one more' 1/2 cup portion. Please help me to eat only the salad if I have to go to Olive Garden with my family. I ate Olive Garden twice in one week and gained 4 lbs. I give up. I do NOT want any more pasta! Please help me to stay away from carbs. Please help me to be happy with what I have accomplished so far. I am wearing a size 16. I haven't been a 16 since 7th grade. That was 13 years ago! I haven't been this small in 13 years. Please help me to appreciate that. Help me believe that I am doing a great job. I know I have lost more than the average banded person that is 14 months out, but I am really struggling to believe it. Please help me to deal with stress better. Help me to not go to the fridge and graze when I'm stressed out. Please help me to feel motivated to exercise. I have all the tools I need for this journey. Please help me to use them. Please guide me to the right answers. I need help.
Amen
OMG, FINALLY!!!!
Jul 16, 2010
I've been avoiding the scales for a couple weeks. I've been mentally and physically stressed and I didn't want to deal with it. lol I've been retaining water like a camel in the summer too! I got that under control though, had to take a quick trip to m PCP for a renewal on my diuretic. My BP at the office was 112/64. WITHOUT meds!!!! He was quite ecstatic, not because I took myself off my meds lol, but that it was so good and that I'd lost so much weight since he last saw me. I told him my problem with working on my feet 10-12 hours/ day (I'm a nurse) and my ankles being cankles by the time I get home. Lately, I've been holding water around my midsection too...like a fierce amount! My scrubs were busting at the seams a few days ago. Maybe TOM is coming? Who knows... I sure don't! I never know when it's gonna happen. Anyway...he cautioned me to only take the diuretic 3x/week since my bp is so low. lol..my bp is so low...never heard that before :) So...after peeing damn near 3 gallons yesterday, I decided that today, I felt skinny, and I was gonna get on those damn scales. There it was....227.8. I stood there and stared until the numbers turned off. I got off, got on again, and there it was! 227.8!!!! That's -101 pounds!!! I FINALLY broke the -100 mark! I've been sitting at -98 and -99 for about 4 weeks! I screamed until the light went off again. I then ran to get my cell phone, got back on the scales, saw 227.8, and took a pic to remember the occasion. ;) Since I have accomplished my first major goal of losing 100 lbs..I'm gonna do something to celebrate. I can't take the cruis I wanted since I am starting back to school next month and have to pay out of pocket. Grr...don't qualify for Pell grant and my school won't take federal student loans. I want to do something damn it! I've been working so hard! I need a parade or something! I have been thinking of a tattoo...but I'm not sure. I'm having thoughts about a pedicure and a new outfit. I don't know...but it's gonna be something. :) I might take pics this weekend in clothes I used to wear. That always makes me feel better.
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i need a break...mentally
Jul 04, 2010
I am being way too hard on myself. I'm struggling with weight loss, I'm struggling with being banded. I'm just mentally exhausted from all of this. I need a break....a sebatical for a week or 2. I have got to clear my head before I can do this anymore.
This week I will NOT:
-weigh twice daily, daily, or even this week
-stress over 1-2 lbs
- try to starve myself to get those 1-2 lbs gone
-focus so hard on how far I have left to go
-work myself up into a frenzy about carbs
- stop seeing myself as how big i used to be
- struggle with body image
This week I WILL-
- keep the scales hidden until Friday
- continue to make good food choices
-appreciate how far I've come
-start ENJOYING my new life and love myself
-start seeing myself as a thinner, healthier version of what i used to be
- be happy.
I am going to start right now appreciating how far i've come:
-from my heaviest at 334, to 229
-from a sixe 4x top to a 1x
-from a size 3x scrub top to a large
-from a size 2x scrub bottom to a medium
-from a size 26 pants to a loose 16, snug 14
- from a size 10 shoe to a 9 (yes..my feet shrunk)
-from a size 32 dress to a size 18 dress
-from a bra size 46DDD to a 40DD
-from a 21 inch neck to a 16 inch neck
I have come so far....and change so much for the better. why is it so hard to be happy with that??
I just need a break from everything that has to do with weight loss. I need a break from OH, from the scales.....from it all.
1 comment
This week I will NOT:
-weigh twice daily, daily, or even this week
-stress over 1-2 lbs
- try to starve myself to get those 1-2 lbs gone
-focus so hard on how far I have left to go
-work myself up into a frenzy about carbs
- stop seeing myself as how big i used to be
- struggle with body image
This week I WILL-
- keep the scales hidden until Friday
- continue to make good food choices
-appreciate how far I've come
-start ENJOYING my new life and love myself
-start seeing myself as a thinner, healthier version of what i used to be
- be happy.
I am going to start right now appreciating how far i've come:
-from my heaviest at 334, to 229
-from a sixe 4x top to a 1x
-from a size 3x scrub top to a large
-from a size 2x scrub bottom to a medium
-from a size 26 pants to a loose 16, snug 14
- from a size 10 shoe to a 9 (yes..my feet shrunk)
-from a size 32 dress to a size 18 dress
-from a bra size 46DDD to a 40DD
-from a 21 inch neck to a 16 inch neck
I have come so far....and change so much for the better. why is it so hard to be happy with that??
I just need a break from everything that has to do with weight loss. I need a break from OH, from the scales.....from it all.
liquids only until I'm -100 lbs!
Jun 30, 2010
Don't panic. I'm not starving myself. There's 2 reasons I have put myself on a liquid diet...
1) Plateau Buster- I am struggling between 1 and 3 lbs until I am at -100 lbs. They will NOT go away! So..I'm gonna make em. I'm gonna go on liquids for as long as I can. I'm sure I won't be able to make it more than like 3 days though lol I'm so glad I didn't have to do 2 weeks of liquids prior to surgery! I would have never made it!
2) our little lap band friend, 'constipation'. nuff said.
I've been liquids only for about 47 hours. I feel soooo good! I know it's hard to believe this, but I do! I had a BM! lol I haven't weighed yet, but I feel thinner. My abdomen isn't so distended anymore, lol...damn constipation. I didn't think I'd be able to make it more than a day on liquids, but surprisingly, I'm fine. I'm not even hungry!
**update on my liquids only plan****
grrr...not getting the results i was trying for. i am sitting steady at 231-232. my lowest weight i've gotten to was 229 a week ago. the last time i ate was lunch on monday....it's fixin to be lunch on friday. i've had protein shakes, water, and vitamins. that's it! why am I not losing?!?! ughhhh...i know it's probably water weight. i'm just hoping it comes off soon. i have noticed body changes though. i look kind of deflated lol so i know there's gotta be some inches falling off. the lbs need to follow!! i'm not anorexic, so don't think that. i'm afraid of the 'plateau busters' diet because you have to eat meat 5 times a day. i never ate 5 times a day and i'm afraid that'll actually make me gain weight! i'm gonna stick it out a little longer and see what happens. my scrubs are actually feeling a little looser than they were last week. hell..i'll give it another day or two. it's not like i'm starving myself.
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1) Plateau Buster- I am struggling between 1 and 3 lbs until I am at -100 lbs. They will NOT go away! So..I'm gonna make em. I'm gonna go on liquids for as long as I can. I'm sure I won't be able to make it more than like 3 days though lol I'm so glad I didn't have to do 2 weeks of liquids prior to surgery! I would have never made it!
2) our little lap band friend, 'constipation'. nuff said.
I've been liquids only for about 47 hours. I feel soooo good! I know it's hard to believe this, but I do! I had a BM! lol I haven't weighed yet, but I feel thinner. My abdomen isn't so distended anymore, lol...damn constipation. I didn't think I'd be able to make it more than a day on liquids, but surprisingly, I'm fine. I'm not even hungry!
**update on my liquids only plan****
grrr...not getting the results i was trying for. i am sitting steady at 231-232. my lowest weight i've gotten to was 229 a week ago. the last time i ate was lunch on monday....it's fixin to be lunch on friday. i've had protein shakes, water, and vitamins. that's it! why am I not losing?!?! ughhhh...i know it's probably water weight. i'm just hoping it comes off soon. i have noticed body changes though. i look kind of deflated lol so i know there's gotta be some inches falling off. the lbs need to follow!! i'm not anorexic, so don't think that. i'm afraid of the 'plateau busters' diet because you have to eat meat 5 times a day. i never ate 5 times a day and i'm afraid that'll actually make me gain weight! i'm gonna stick it out a little longer and see what happens. my scrubs are actually feeling a little looser than they were last week. hell..i'll give it another day or two. it's not like i'm starving myself.
ribs anyone????
Jun 24, 2010
mmmm...ribs. not those delicious Sonny's BBQ ribs smothered in sweet BBQ sauce....no...I'm talkin about MY ribs! MINE??? WTF? I have ribs?! turns out lol......I do. So the other night I was lying on my side in bed with my dear boyfriend..just talkin, tryin to go to sleep. He throws his arm over me and says.. "Baby....what's that big knot under your skin??????" I'm like 'WTF?!' So I feel where he is rubbing and giggle....it was a rib. I ran my hand along my side and I could easily feel all my ribs. This was quite exciting!! (he thought so too ;) ;) ;) lol) But it also made me realize that my bone structure will never let me be a size 10 :( I have big bones! I'm 229lbs right now, and I can feel bones. My goal is 185..I hope I don't look anorexic at that weight. Kinda sucks that I'll never be as skinny as some people. Reckon I'll be 'thick'...but I'm totally ok with that. Thick is SEXXY! As long as I am a HEALTHY thick, I will be completely happy with myself. Khloe Kardashian is thick, and she's toned and gorgeous! That's my goal....Khloe Kardashian lol
Soooo...food choices have been ok this week. I'm eating the same food but I had a couple days where I wanted to eat all day. Not because I was hungry though. I just wanted to graze. :( I have to stop that or I'll never get where I need and want to be. Exercise? lol...ehhh, not as much as I should. I have been helping my boyfriend build a barn, so there's sweat and lifting right there. I've been working my arms and legs on his Tower 200 that he bought off the tv. It actually works pretty well. I was surprised. Yesterday I went for my 3 mile walk and by the time I got home I was drenched in sweat and felt like I would DIE. 100 degree humid weather is not the most comfortable to exercise in. Sometimes I hate Florida.
OT- I'm going to pick up my lawn mower from the shop as soon as I get off work. My loving stepdad overfilled it with oil, never told me he put any in it, and I crunk it and ran it til it died. But the shop has it all fixed up and ready for me to get. So...I will be cutting my waist high grass this weekend. haha I'm actually excited for that! I'm sure I'll be sweating midgets but it'll burn some calories. Not so much the riding mower part, but I have some trimming to do with the weed eater. It's kind of weird..I WANT to be outdoors and in the sunshine...even though it's hotter than the devil's backside.
until later when I'm bored and need to blog....
1 comment
Soooo...food choices have been ok this week. I'm eating the same food but I had a couple days where I wanted to eat all day. Not because I was hungry though. I just wanted to graze. :( I have to stop that or I'll never get where I need and want to be. Exercise? lol...ehhh, not as much as I should. I have been helping my boyfriend build a barn, so there's sweat and lifting right there. I've been working my arms and legs on his Tower 200 that he bought off the tv. It actually works pretty well. I was surprised. Yesterday I went for my 3 mile walk and by the time I got home I was drenched in sweat and felt like I would DIE. 100 degree humid weather is not the most comfortable to exercise in. Sometimes I hate Florida.
OT- I'm going to pick up my lawn mower from the shop as soon as I get off work. My loving stepdad overfilled it with oil, never told me he put any in it, and I crunk it and ran it til it died. But the shop has it all fixed up and ready for me to get. So...I will be cutting my waist high grass this weekend. haha I'm actually excited for that! I'm sure I'll be sweating midgets but it'll burn some calories. Not so much the riding mower part, but I have some trimming to do with the weed eater. It's kind of weird..I WANT to be outdoors and in the sunshine...even though it's hotter than the devil's backside.
until later when I'm bored and need to blog....
I've figured it out!
Jun 18, 2010
I love Food Network. I love food. lol I like to watch Top Chef (although it's on Bravo) and I like Chopped. Those are my fave cooking shows. I have them set on my DVR to record while I'm away at work. So some mornings when I get home from work and can't go straight to sleep, I turn one of them on. I've noticed a pattern though....when I'm watching a food show..I want to snack...the whoooole time. This morning I snacked like crazy when I was watching Chopped. (I was so busy with patients all night I didn't get a chance to eat at work so that didn't help matters. ) I ate a few peanuts, about an ounce of fruit and nut trail mix, my little quiche things I made that I didn't get to eat last night, and some carb free icecream I figured out how to make. Well..hell...now that I look at it..it really wasn't that much. But I ate for the duration of the show. I wasn't even hungry after the quiche thing. No more cooking shows when I get home from work!! Lesson learned, let's move on. 
another teenie weenie tweak
Jun 17, 2010
I had another tweak the other day to keep me in my sweet spot. Right now I'm at 6.2cc in a 10cc band., and I'm almost 14 months out. I think I'm doing pretty good! I still have plenty of room to go lol So anyway, I made a couple poor decisions last week. I had 2 pieces of pizza...not at one time though. It didn't seem to affect me in a bad way like I thought it would! It boosted my metabolism and jump started the weight loss again! Over the weekend I actually LOST weight! HA! lol. I'm at my lowest....230 right now. 2 more lbs and I'll be at my first major goal. -100 lbs!! Ecstatic! I'm so happy with myself right now. I tried on those pairs of 14 jeans in the drawer that game me a MAJOR muffin top at the beginning of the year...and they fit. Nicely I might add ;) I had bought a new bra at the same time as I bought those jeans. Lane Bryant was having a buy 2 get 2 free sale so I bought several different sizes. The smallest was a 40DDD....aaaaaand I tried it on with those 14s. Bam! Hot Mama rollin through! haha God, this is such a hard journey...but I WILL make it to the end!! I have to focus on all the positives and not the negatives of it. I'll keep looking in the mirror and smiling instead of looking for flaws. I WILL do this!
Another thought...I've been trying to plan some sort of celebration for when I reach -100 lbs. I was gonna go on a cruise but funds and situations are different from when I was planning this lol My boyfriend can't get off from work and I'm about to start school again in August (self-paying..gross). I thought about taking $500 and buying a whole new wardrobe, but I've been buying little pieces all along and I'm set on clothes :/ I want to flippin celebrate all my hard work!!! What can I do?!?!?!?!
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Another thought...I've been trying to plan some sort of celebration for when I reach -100 lbs. I was gonna go on a cruise but funds and situations are different from when I was planning this lol My boyfriend can't get off from work and I'm about to start school again in August (self-paying..gross). I thought about taking $500 and buying a whole new wardrobe, but I've been buying little pieces all along and I'm set on clothes :/ I want to flippin celebrate all my hard work!!! What can I do?!?!?!?!
repost from forum- Low Carb Blackberry Ricotta Tarts
Jun 13, 2010
So..I've been eyeballing the blackberry bushes at the end of my driveway and today I picked a huge bowl full. :) I sat down and figured up a recipe to satisfy my sweet cravings and remain in my low carb budget. I'm an avid watcher of food network and I just pretended like I was on Top Chef ;) Here we go...let me know what you think!
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Low Carb Blackberry Ricotta Tarts
With Blackberry Syrup
Tarts:
4 eggs
1 Tsp vanilla extract
¼ cup heavy whipping cream
½ cup Splenda
1 cup ricotta cheese
2 cups blackberries
Preheat oven to 400 degrees. In a large bowl, combine eggs, vanilla extract, heavy whipping cream, Splenda, and ricotta cheese. Fold in blackberries. Pour into nonstick muffin tins (lightly sprayed with Pam or that new Pam for baking). Bake for 18 minutes.
Makes 12
Carbs-1.3 grams each
Syrup:
1 cup blackberries
1 cup Splenda
1 tsp water
Mash blackberries. Combine all ingredients in a small saucepan and simmer over low heat until desired consistency.
Carbs- 4 total
this week kind of sucked
Jun 10, 2010
this week just sucked in general. the scales didn't go down at all for me. i'm stuck at 232-233. i HATE plateaus! i only walked 3 days this week because i've been so dang exhausted. i'm not making excuses, i'm just documenting so i can see where the problem is. i've had zero energy, i've had a fierce headache EVERY day this week, my sleep pattern is shot to hell. i can't sleep more than 4 hours at a time. it's been like this all week. i'll get off work at 8am, sleep til noon at the absolute latest (not by choice, i just wake up), get up and move around, take a nap from about 6-9pm so i won't be in too bad of shape for work that night. i try to lay back down at around 4-5pm and sleep til 9, but i just lay there...eyes sleepy, but they won't close. i'm physically and mentally exhausted. i don't know why the scales are stuck. i'm trying so hard to break into the 220s. I have an ultimate goal of being in one-derland by the end of the year but if I keep progressing like this, it's not gonna happen. what else can i do?!?! i normally eat less than 30 carbs/day. i cheated last sunday and ate one meal from olive garden, i had braised beef and tortellini. i refuse to feel bad about a cheat day. do you know how long it's been since i've had carbs!? grr...i'm just frustrated. i never had a nutritionist, my surgeon was my advice go-to guy, but he up and moved to missouri. i'm frustrated with him too. he comes home once a month for fills and follow ups, but the appointments are rushed because he has to see all the bariatric patients in one day. there will be like 8 people at a time in the radiology waiting room for a fill. how can he pay attention to my needs if he's rushing to get through? the only advice he gives now is to eat less than 30 grams of carbs and exercise 3x/week. well...i've been doing this and nothing else is happening. my inches aren't moving either. i was seeing more prominent neck muscles and collarbones and thought i was losing inches, but when i took measurements, everything was the same. :( anyway, i'll be more optimistic about this upcoming week. i'm just feeling like giving up at this moment.
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About Me
FL
Location
39.7
BMI
Surgery
05/20/2015
Surgery Date
Mar 05, 2009
Member Since
